whiterose2334 Posted March 13, 2016 Posted March 13, 2016 (edited) I'm 25. He's 26. We had argument last night because I have never brought him to see my family whereas he had took me over to see his family. I met his mom and friends in his hometown but he never meets any of mine yet. He called me I'm fake.. Let me mention some background story. A year ago, when I got along with my parents, I did offer him to come see them. I even spoke to my dad telling him that "My bf has some tattoos but it's just for the fashion. He is not a bad man" Being raised up in Asian family, it was quite hard to convince my old-fashioned parents. I feel embarrased to admit my parents criticize people, in the other word, judge the book by its cover. So my dad accepted what I said. I started looking for cheap flights. But me and bf didn't get to go because I reckoned we broke up. And when we got back together, there were a few chances for him to meet my friends who graduated from same school. But it didn't happen. And I wasn't trying hard to make bf meet those friends because they are friends in general who I met in uni. They are not that good friends I can really trust. Unlike friends of bf I met, they are like grown up together, went to school togetger since young age, they arehis best friends who be there for eachother. And we would breakup again for whatever reason. I left him. I felt very sad and brokenhearted. My dad called me and asked me for money. And I told him that "Dad I just brokeup with him. And I don't have enough to provide you what you asked. Could you wait until things get better? " But dad didn't seem to care what I'm experiencing. He continued to pressure me to send some money (money for the bank to pay monthly becauae they bought a house) So I felt....mmm...like...alone. Like no one in my fam supported me emotionally. So I sent them money and told them to never contact me again. "If you only think of me when you need money then you are not my fam. Family is more than this. That is not even my house. I have credit card I have to pay, I never bother you. You don't care what burden Im carrying. So leave me alone" Then 1-2 months later me and bf tried to work things out. We got back together again. I have told my bf what happended in my fam. Time flies, his friends askes him if he has met my parents. And bf told me that when he was asked like that he felt a bit .....not good. Because his friends who date Asian girl they all have met their gf's family. And he started to be untrusting towards me lately. Called me fake. Said that I'm using him. Said to me that "I've been with you for 3 years and I haven't met any of ur fam and friends. Something is not right. You're fake really." And I explained to him like the way I wrote it above. He doesn't understand. To me, I feel like he fired bullets after bullets to me. Im hurt. Please advise what I should do pr say to him. He is kind. But when he is mouthful and not understanding I do feel unhappy over this. Thank you. P.s I'm thinking to start talking to my parents but the issue is that it will be the door for my parents bother me with money. I gave them money whenI had enough they didn't have to ask for it. But I don't like when they ask for it when I dont have it because it makes me angry. Or maybe I should just leave my bf. He approached this subject like AH. He didn't act like a friend and work with me. Im not sure. It's overwhelming Edited March 13, 2016 by whiterose2334
Els Posted March 13, 2016 Posted March 13, 2016 Is introducing him to your parents even the major issue here though? Your other threads mention that you broke up because he lied, not because of parents. Could you elaborate on that? That being said, to answer your question in and of itself - I do think that after 3 yrs together it is reasonable to expect to meet the parents, but that is assuming that the family circumstances are reasonably normal. Yours are not, so I do think you should be exempted from this expectation. I mean, how can he expect you to introduce him to your parents when you don't even speak to them anymore yourself?
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