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did i blow it?

tylerjones

By tylerjones
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tylerjones New Member

tylerjones

Posted
Posted

Hi, I really need some input here

 

I went on a date Friday Night and had a good time. I called her monday and set up a date for next monday

 

Well for some reason I got all clingy and needy on her yesterday with my texting

 

She is id nursing school and works so that takes up much of her time which i understand

 

We were texting yesterday and this is basically what happened

 

me:Sooo what are you looking for if anything?

me: Im not wanting to jump into anything at all. just curious

me: cuz i did have a nice time with you

me: If your just wanting a good time, thats understandable. if you just wanna see where things lead, thats cool to

me: I have no idea why i said all that. lets just go out next monday and have a good time

 

her: lol

her: chill

her: Im not looking for naything serious. nursing shcool is my top priority. i graduate and that comes before anyone else besides my family

her: are you wanting anything in particular?

her: Imean you were pretty legit over not being in a relationship

 

me: im not sure what happend lol. i swear i AM NOT a clinger lol

me: im not really looking for anything in particular. whatever happens, happens. i dont really like putting pressure on anything.

 

her: wait. i thought you and i had a connection? i thought you loved me!

 

me: that cant happen till you bowl

 

her: guess you'll never marry me

 

me: ha ill survive somehow

 

 

I laid off today. she snapchatted me today a couple of snaps but thats it

 

I don't know why I went crazy like that. I NEVER DO THAT. I really did have a great time with her and she really intrigued me.

 

I mean, I'm tired of playing games. I would like to get to know here and see where it leads is why i was aksing her that

 

So is there anything i can do? Did I ruin it? I mean she was tetxing and joking after

  • Like 1
smudge21 Established Member

smudge21

Posted
Posted

Ah the classic feeling of regret over trivial things. Stop with the over thinking. You've only just met and you're both feeling each other out. Yeah, you did over do it on those texts a bit her replies seem okay. You're both asking each other what they want out of this and I never like that, as each of you will be trying to say something that's also honest but also doesn't push the other away (or pull them too close).

 

 

Try not to worry about it but also recognise when you're about to flood the girl with texts and back off. Keep them short and sweet unless you know for a fact she prefers texting over phone calls. Plus take into account her life style so don't fall into that trap of expecting responses instantly.

 

 

I actually quite liked her tongue in cheek response of "I thought you loved me" and you're reply of "can't happen until you bowl" and what followed there. If I'm reading that right, it came off as you both had a sweet moment, without either coming on too strong or seeming uninterested.

  • Like 1
Toodaloo Established Member

Toodaloo

Posted
Posted

Go bowling and tell her face to face. I just want to date you, no one else and see where it leads. I want to enjoy spending time with you and getting to know you. Check that she feels the same and then carry on enjoying your date.

 

This girl wants to be cool but she also doesn't want to share you with a load of other girls or be a FWB.

  • Like 3
smackie9 Established Member

smackie9

Posted
Posted

Why not just keep things light/casual and get to know her proper before investing yourself so suddenly. You could potentially ruin things if you keep at her about it. Relax, and just enjoy her company. Then if you are at say date 6, then approach her about being exclusive. IMO wait til she is more emotionally invested, it will increase your chances of her wanting something more serious.

  • Like 1
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tylerjones New Member

tylerjones

Posted
  • Author
Posted

The reason i asked her that is because I wasn't sure. The last few girls liked to play the whole were dating but we are not card which is annoying

  • Like 2
smackie9 Established Member

smackie9

Posted
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This is why we date.....to see if there is potential for a serious relationship. Even after two months of dating one can change their mind. it's all trial and error, just part of the process.

 

The ones that have major priorities, busy with career, school, etc would be the ones who are not ready for someone serious. Just saying.

  • Like 1
Satu Established Member

Satu

Posted
Posted

Snip

*I really did have a great time with her and she really intrigued me.

 

 

*Thats what you should have said to her.

 

Just that and the arrangements for the next date.

 

Relax.

 

 

Take care.

Mrin Established Member

Mrin

Posted
Posted

Dude.

 

I don't know if you messed it up or not but here's a handy rule for you to use in the future: don't use text for anything even remotely serious.

 

Come on man, say it with me - don't use text for anything even remotely serious. Pick up the phone or do it in person. Why? Here, read the first half of your text convo aloud in a "leave Brittany Alone" voice. Stage 5 clinger - run! Now read it out loud in a Rocky voice. That's just kinda funny.

 

Texting is so open to interpretation and honestly, talking about stuff like this on text is uber passive and weak. Just don't do it.

 

Good luck man!

  • Like 1
Miss Peach Established Member

Miss Peach

Posted
Posted
Dude.

 

I don't know if you messed it up or not but here's a handy rule for you to use in the future: don't use text for anything even remotely serious.

 

I totally agree with this rule.

 

From that text conversation I couldn't tell what either of you wanted other than her first priority is school. It read like a I'll show you mine if you show me yours type of thing. If she still talked to you, agrees to see you, and actually does then I'd say that's a good sign.

  • Like 1
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tylerjones New Member

tylerjones

Posted
  • Author
Posted
I totally agree with this rule.

 

From that text conversation I couldn't tell what either of you wanted other than her first priority is school. It read like a I'll show you mine if you show me yours type of thing. If she still talked to you, agrees to see you, and actually does then I'd say that's a good sign.

 

 

yea just whew..thank goodness

  • Like 1
Satu Established Member

Satu

Posted
Posted

Snip

I totally agree with this rule.

 

Me too.

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tylerjones New Member

tylerjones

Posted
  • Author
Posted

I don't think it was bad as i thought

Jabron1 Established Member

Jabron1

Posted
Posted

Chill out, mate! There's a song that you need to listen to :D

 

 

"You need to hold it down Jack, put your phone back

Quit staring into space and eat your snack, that's that

She'll want you much more for not hanging on

Stop me if I'm wrong, stop me if I'm wrong...

 

Hold it down boy, your head's getting blurred

I know you cant stop thinking of her

By all means you can vibe with this girl

But just don't mug yourself, that's all don't mug yourself!"

xcupid Established Member

xcupid

Posted
Posted

Leave it be. You're way overthinking this. Keep it light and fun.

d0nnivain Established Member

d0nnivain

Posted
Posted
I don't think it was bad as i thought

 

It wasn't. She interjected humor into it to lighten the tone.

 

One minor little mini-freak out . . . eh . . everybody is insecure. It's part of being human. You do this again & then you look like a Cling-on.

While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!
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