Jabron1 Posted March 13, 2016 Posted March 13, 2016 So how do you define girl game? Or is that too long for this thread?! Girl game is looking to attract the highest value man possible. Girl game is make-up, hair and nails. Girl game is attention seeking. Girl game is having adventure sex with some men, whilst making other men 'wait'. Girl game is monogamy when convenient. Girl game is balancing the need for good DNA (the exciting guy), with the need for security (the safe guy). Girl game is friendzones, orbiters, and other ways of cultivating options. Girl game is putting men on 'breaks', checking out of relationships early, and branch swinging. Girl game is having to deal with a biological clock which factors into decision making. Girl game is having a ready-made rationalisation for their game... Who's the player now?
katiegrl Posted March 13, 2016 Posted March 13, 2016 Girl game is looking to attract the highest value man possible. Girl game is make-up, hair and nails. Girl game is attention seeking. Girl game is having adventure sex with some men, whilst making other men 'wait'. Girl game is monogamy when convenient. Girl game is balancing the need for good DNA (the exciting guy), with the need for security (the safe guy). Girl game is friendzones, orbiters, and other ways of cultivating options. Girl game is putting men on 'breaks', checking out of relationships early, and branch swinging. Girl game is having to deal with a biological clock which factors into decision making. Girl game is having a ready-made rationalisation for their game... Who's the player now? Oh goodness, I have no girl game! Sounds lovely.....NOT!
Jabron1 Posted March 13, 2016 Posted March 13, 2016 (edited) Oh goodness, I have no girl game! Sounds lovely.....NOT! I can point out many, many, many posts on here as examples of girl game. But I won't, because I don't want to start a row, or make anyone feel like I'm picking them out. My point is merely that calling a guy a player is hypocritical. Everyone is a player in the dating game. Edited March 13, 2016 by Jabron1
katiegrl Posted March 13, 2016 Posted March 13, 2016 (edited) My point is merely that calling a guy a player is hypocritical. Everyone is a player in the dating game. Sort of like everyone has *game* too right? Things they do to attract the opposite sex? I suppose I am a player too then. NOT any of the above (shudders)...except maybe hair, make-up (very little) and nails (sometimes). But I am friendly, open and approachable. And very feminine in looks, voice, mannerisms. I know this and use it to my advantage. I like to flirt a bit too ... and get asked out quite often. If I like him, we go on a date. If I don't like him after that, I move on. It may take a long time and many first dates with different men before I find one I wish to embark on a RL with. Mutual chemistry, attraction and compatibility being of the upmost importance. I am pretty *picky* when it comes to this. Most guys don't understand. It disappoints and sometimes angers them, and I bet they accuse me of being a *girl player* because of it. So yeah, you are right, I have *game* and I am a "player". Glad I figured that out...whew! Edited March 13, 2016 by katiegrl 1
SammySammy Posted March 13, 2016 Posted March 13, 2016 The game is real whether we believe it or not. Politics is a game. Business is a game. Marriage and dating is definitely a game. Now, there are differences in the skill of players. Some players are professionals. Some are amateurs. Some suck at playing the game and choose to sit on the sidelines. But, the game goes on. 3
katiegrl Posted March 13, 2016 Posted March 13, 2016 (edited) The game is real whether we believe it or not. Politics is a game. Business is a game. Marriage and dating is definitely a game. Now, there are differences in the skill of players. Some players are professionals. Some are amateurs. Some suck at playing the game and choose to sit on the sidelines. But, the game goes on. Oh I know and have said so. There was another thread discussing this... wherein I said, when played correctly, the "game" of dating is fun! That *having game* is not a bad thing, but a necessary thing. I said this in that other thread too, but I think the problem is how people define *game* and *player*. We are all searching for "the one right person for us.". This may take dating several different people, maybe for a long time. That is how I define player. Someone single, searching and dating different people in search of the one they wish to have RL with. Both men and women. It is not a bad thing! Lying, cheating and mis-leading are completely different, and IMO fall into the category of sociopath (and d-bag .... lol). We all do things in an attempt to attract the opposite sex. IMO, this is "having game." Everyone defines these two terms differently, and depending on that definition, it's either a bad and negative thing, or a good, necessary and positive thing. Hope that makes sense ....I'm tired!! Good night! :) Edited March 13, 2016 by katiegrl 1
SammySammy Posted March 13, 2016 Posted March 13, 2016 Oh I know and have said so. There was another thread discussing this... wherein I said, when played correctly, the "game" of dating is fun! That *having game* is not a bad thing, but a necessary thing. I said this in that other thread too, but I think the problem is how people define *game* and *player*. We are all searching for "the one right person for us.". This may take dating several different people, maybe for a long time. That is how I define player. Both men and women. Lying, cheating and mis-leading are completely different, and IMO fall into the category of sociopath (and d-bag .... lol). We all do things in an attempt to attract the opposite sex. IMO, this is "having game." Everyone defines these two terms differently, and depending on that definition, it's either a bad and negative thing, or a good, necessary and positive thing. Hope that makes sense ....I'm tired!! Good night! :) I actually agree with this. Most people misuse the word player and have no idea what it really means. A guy simply sleeping with a lot of women is not a player. A guy lying, cheating and misleading women is not a player. A real player, as the term was originally used, has several relationships simultaneously without needing to lie to anyone. True players have a ... stable ... and they all know each other.
Jabron1 Posted March 13, 2016 Posted March 13, 2016 Lying, cheating and mis-leading are completely different, and IMO fall into the category of sociopath (and d-bag .... lol). In my opinion a liar is a liar, and a cheat is a cheat. And should just be labelled as such. Women call these guys 'players', but they are playing a weak and whipped game. The game is real whether we believe it or not. Politics is a game. Business is a game. Marriage and dating is definitely a game. Now, there are differences in the skill of players. Some players are professionals. Some are amateurs. Some suck at playing the game and choose to sit on the sidelines. But, the game goes on. Yet too many women will outright deny their part in it. While sitting back and judging 'players'. 1
katiegrl Posted March 13, 2016 Posted March 13, 2016 I actually agree with this. Most people misuse the word player and have no idea what it really means. A guy simply sleeping with a lot of women is not a player. A guy lying, cheating and misleading women is not a player. A real player, as the term was originally used, has several relationships simultaneously without needing to lie to anyone. True players have a ... stable ... and they all know each other. Using the original definition, it should be fairly easy to avoid dating a player then. Early on, let him know what you're about, how you date (one at a time or multi), and since players don't need to lie, then he will be honest and upfront in telling you what HE is about too! If his style doesn't work for you, or match yours, move on! Problem is, many women think they can change him. That her "love" will change him. So they stick around, and when he doesn't change, they get their hearts broken, and accuse the guy of being a *player*!! 1
katiegrl Posted March 13, 2016 Posted March 13, 2016 In my opinion a liar is a liar, and a cheat is a cheat. And should just be labelled as such. Well yeah ...I just said that! Cept I tossed in sociopath and d-bag too for good measure and added emphasis....lol
SammySammy Posted March 13, 2016 Posted March 13, 2016 Using the original definition, it should be fairly easy to avoid dating a player then. Early on, let him know what you're about, how you date (one at a time or multi), and since players don't need to lie, then he will be honest and upfront in telling you what HE is about too! If his style doesn't work for you, or match yours, move on! Problem is, many women think they can change him. That her "love" will change him. So they stick around, and when he doesn't change, they get their hearts broken, and accuse the guy of being a *player*!! True, true. I agree again. 1
soph-walker Posted March 13, 2016 Posted March 13, 2016 Yes, a big issue of mine. I avoided getting too involved with this man for 4 years. I decided after almost 2 years of being completely single to give it a shot. People kept telling me he kept coming back for a reason lol But yes.. Even though they have all gotten into relationships. Doesn't mean they are happy. I just take comfort in knowing the next girl can now deal with their sh** Hey hon, I can relate to this. I was pursued by a player for about 2/3 years on and off every couple of months. He ended up wearing me down and I caved in...only for him to completely chuck me and wash his hands of me once he'd got bored. I think men/women that try to play people are narcissists and should be kept well clear of. Everything they do is to fuel their ego and keep the ball in their court. I would shake the dust off and move on, you deserve someone to treat you with admiration and love.
Revolver Posted March 13, 2016 Posted March 13, 2016 Being a player is mostly correlated to options so unless his options start dwindling down then to answer this thread yes
thecrucible Posted March 14, 2016 Posted March 14, 2016 No. People can change. Sometimes people act a certain way, make mistakes, then get humble and change. However if there are recent patterns that suggest they are a player then I would avoid someone like that as they can't have changed much. I don't date someone to change him.
stillafool Posted March 14, 2016 Posted March 14, 2016 When I was with him, he made me feel like i was the only one. He would stare at me, laugh with me. Tell me how funny I was. How gorgeous I was. He would sit across from me at every dinner and stroke my hand. That is when I started to think that maybe he was falling for me. What does cad stand for? I am interested Perhaps he does thinhk you are funny and gorgeous. Why does that have to be a lie? It's just that he probably meets and dates alot of women who are funny and gorgeous. 1
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