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This girl I am "dating"has a lot of issues?


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Posted

Last year I met a 19 year old girl from Czech Republic. She was visiting his father because apparently his mother is Czech and his father is American so when she was a kid they got divorced and she grew up with his mom in Czech Republic.

 

She was a little cold but I could see that she cared about me. She was mature but she used to talk bad about his father when she was drunk and other times she acted like a little kid, like one time she broke her own bracelet and then started crying because it was a gift from her father (she was a little drunk) but most of the time she was nice.

 

She also have a lot of trust issues, she called herself fat (she is definitely not) and one time she admitted that she didn't eat for 2 days (she was also drunk)

 

Now she is back in Czech Republic and I texted her (after 1 month without talking) and she just texted me "don't talk to me again" I think she is angry because I don't contact her very often.

 

Should I leave her alone even if I really really like this girl or should I try to fix the things and help her?

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Posted

snip

 

Now she is back in Czech Republic and I texted her (after 1 month without talking) and she just texted me "don't talk to me again" I think she is angry because I don't contact her very often.

 

Should I leave her alone even if I really really like this girl or should I try to fix the things and help her?

 

Respect her wishes and leave her alone.

 

If someone tells you not to contact them you shouldn't.

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Posted
Last year I met a 19 year old girl from Czech Republic. She was visiting his father because apparently his mother is Czech and his father is American so when she was a kid they got divorced and she grew up with his mom in Czech Republic.

 

She was a little cold but I could see that she cared about me. She was mature but she used to talk bad about his father when she was drunk and other times she acted like a little kid, like one time she broke her own bracelet and then started crying because it was a gift from her father (she was a little drunk) but most of the time she was nice.

 

She also have a lot of trust issues, she called herself fat (she is definitely not) and one time she admitted that she didn't eat for 2 days (she was also drunk)

 

Now she is back in Czech Republic and I texted her (after 1 month without talking) and she just texted me "don't talk to me again" I think she is angry because I don't contact her very often.

 

Should I leave her alone even if I really really like this girl or should I try to fix the things and help her?

 

You do not have the life skills or mental health skills to help a young, insecure, immature, blossoming alcoholic.

Posted

WAY too many red flags here; young, insecure, immature, drunk, emotional, unstable PLUS living so far away?

 

OP, forget her. Relationships are difficult to manage at the best of times never mind with someone this unbalanced AND trying to do it LD.

 

Cut your losses while you can.

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Posted
You do not have the life skills or mental health skills to help a young, insecure, immature, blossoming alcoholic.

 

 

I don't think she has a drunk problem. I just saw her a little drunk 3 times during this 4 months and it was because we were in a party. But I will leave her alone. I don't understand why most of hot chicks are crazy!

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Posted

I will leave her alone then. And

Posted

She isn't ready mentally to take on the responsibilities of a relationship. Long distance relationships are real tough when it comes to trust. It can be difficult even for the maturest of people. This type of relationship would be way too difficult for her to handle since she is so insecure, and has abandonment issues stemming from her childhood.

 

Sorry it couldn't work out for you. She knows she can't deal with the separation, that's why she backed off. I agree you should respect her wishes for everyone's sake.

Posted

Sounds like she does have a lot of issues and is using you as an emotional crutch, albeit not intentionally perhaps. I personally vote against helping her fix her issues. You care this much because you have feelings for her. Sometimes when our judgement is clouded, we tend to believe that by being her "therapist" she'd eventually come around and see how great you are and then when she gets better she'd be all yours. Turns out usually when someone's "broken" or "damaged" they can only work on themselves alone or through time. When they get better you won't be the one they suddenly turn to.

 

I'd leave her alone and limit contact. However you don't have to be mean and go completely cold turkey on her when she's sober and reasonable.

 

Also, 19 years old is really young. To me, that's an age when you still have no idea what you're doing and has a lot of growing up to do.

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