Dontfindme Posted March 8, 2016 Posted March 8, 2016 Does anyone else get really heartbroken/depressed when the weather is so great? It's amazing in NYC today. And I feel pretty crappy, as I won't be spending it with my ex. I know it's sort of pathetic, but great weather was something we so actively looked forward to, and now he's gone, and I just dread it. And the weather is just going to get better and better... I know this probably sounds ridiculous to most people. 3
amaysngrace Posted March 8, 2016 Posted March 8, 2016 He doesn't have dibs on enjoying nice weather. It's there for you to enjoy too. Do you have a skateboard or a bike? 2
Author Dontfindme Posted March 8, 2016 Author Posted March 8, 2016 He doesn't have dibs on enjoying nice weather. It's there for you to enjoy too. Do you have a skateboard or a bike? I know, he doesn't. The problem is that I just don't enjoy it anymore. I had a bike. It was stolen unfortunately.
Raina314 Posted March 8, 2016 Posted March 8, 2016 I'm in DC, and the weather's great here too. Its had the opposite effect for me because I always get a little down in the winter anyways, so spring gives me a real boost, maybe also because the first time I had my heartbroken I also recovered in the spring. It makes me feel alive again, especially since almost every guy I know prefers winter to spring/summer, including my ex, so its "my" season now instead. I do understand how you feel though, I felt that way around Christmas and it was awful cuz everyone else seems to be happy, so no, it doesnt sound crazy. 1
sorano Posted March 8, 2016 Posted March 8, 2016 I live on long island. The weather was nice in ny today. I was at work. Even though I put my foot down a few days ago and said to myself, enough is enough with feeling sad and that no person will make me feel like crap and ruin my life, I will admit, it did make me feel a little depressed. Its not ridiculous. Nice weather, parties, family events, will be very hard to deal with now. Its just something else on this path we are all in that we have to overcome and figure out a way to be happy. There will always be something new that you have to overcome. 2
benB Posted March 9, 2016 Posted March 9, 2016 Haha I was just thinking the same thing earlier today. Like wow, she broke up with me right when the weather was turning, I wanted to be outside with her in the spring/summer. But those thoughts didn't last long, I am in DC as well and the weather was perfect for outdoor basketball so thats what I did. I feel better now, go enjoy the weather! 2
Simon Phoenix Posted March 9, 2016 Posted March 9, 2016 Good weather means lots of attractive people outside wearing less clothing than normal. If anything, spring is the perfect time to be unfettered. Gotta look at the bright side. 2
Blanco Posted March 9, 2016 Posted March 9, 2016 I'm the opposite. We were having some unseasonably nice weather a couple weeks ago and I was feeling OK. Then we had a huge snow storm that kept me inside for a couple days and I found myself feeling a bit down. It's been beautiful the last two days and I just feel really good. Yeah, I'm still thinking about her, but this sort of weather just brings out people and the world feels a little less empty because of it. 2
Author Dontfindme Posted March 9, 2016 Author Posted March 9, 2016 Thank you guys for the positivity. You're all right, I think I just have to go through the emotions and learn to enjoy the good stuff, solo. And yes, the uplifting weather, lots of people out and about having fun - it's bound to lead to something good. 1
TaraMaiden2 Posted March 9, 2016 Posted March 9, 2016 It's absolutely bucketing it down here, at the moment. You're very welcome to it. I'd trade our weather for yours any day. 1
kztar Posted March 9, 2016 Posted March 9, 2016 I live in NYC too and it's much nicer than yesterday. I honestly been so depressed and seeing everyone enjoy life while im miserable is just not enjoyable. I just want to go home and sleep the year away until next spring. SMH. Maybe I go take a stroll to Central Park today for the hell of it. 1
kztar Posted March 9, 2016 Posted March 9, 2016 I live on long island. The weather was nice in ny today. I was at work. Even though I put my foot down a few days ago and said to myself, enough is enough with feeling sad and that no person will make me feel like crap and ruin my life, I will admit, it did make me feel a little depressed. Its not ridiculous. Nice weather, parties, family events, will be very hard to deal with now. Its just something else on this path we are all in that we have to overcome and figure out a way to be happy. There will always be something new that you have to overcome. Ughhh My ex lives there. I don't think I would go there for a while. I used to drive there every weekend for nothing. Talk about the LIE and that traffic. Yet all for nothing.
kztar Posted March 9, 2016 Posted March 9, 2016 Thank you guys for the positivity. You're all right, I think I just have to go through the emotions and learn to enjoy the good stuff, solo. And yes, the uplifting weather, lots of people out and about having fun - it's bound to lead to something good. Can you say we are on the same boat ?. Now he's gone so I look forward to beautiful days just being miserable. 1
burnt Posted March 9, 2016 Posted March 9, 2016 Does anyone else get really heartbroken/depressed when the weather is so great? Yes, I do. I feel exactly the same way as you do. It used to be the case that when the weather was bad, my mood was bad. The entire winter gloom brought about 'seasonal depression' which MANY people suffer from. The lack of sunlight, the cold everything makes you feel less energetic and more depressed. But now it's exactly the opposite for me. Each day when the weather is really pleasant it brings really beautiful memories of my ex, which then immediately turns painful because it reminds me of the loss. I see the incredible color in the sky in the morning, I recognize how beautiful it is; my mind then immediately goes to thinking: I wish I could share this image with him right now. Then I also remember 'that' time when he said something very specific like "it's a beautiful morning and I'm thinking of you…". The memories of his words are now somehow forever tied to the changes in the weather. If the breeze is pleasant, somehow it reminds me of that specific day/time when I was with him and I remember the breeze felt exactly the same way. So, no, what you are saying doesn't sound ridiculous to me. Nice weather = triggers for happy memories happy memories = triggers for pain since the person is gone. End result: nice weather = pain. But it's so sad, because nice weather is usually something that can help to alleviate depression, instead it turns to aggravate the depression. 1
Author Dontfindme Posted March 9, 2016 Author Posted March 9, 2016 Can you say we are on the same boat ?. Now he's gone so I look forward to beautiful days just being miserable. Yeah, that's how I've been feeling too. It's hard to break free of that mindset. I took today off from work, and kept looking out my window at the beautiful weather, and I felt a physical ache in my body. I keep having to distract myself from this sadness or longing, but it's there in the background. Yes, I do. I feel exactly the same way as you do. It used to be the case that when the weather was bad, my mood was bad. The entire winter gloom brought about 'seasonal depression' which MANY people suffer from. The lack of sunlight, the cold everything makes you feel less energetic and more depressed. But now it's exactly the opposite for me. Each day when the weather is really pleasant it brings really beautiful memories of my ex, which then immediately turns painful because it reminds me of the loss. I see the incredible color in the sky in the morning, I recognize how beautiful it is; my mind then immediately goes to thinking: I wish I could share this image with him right now. Then I also remember 'that' time when he said something very specific like "it's a beautiful morning and I'm thinking of you…". The memories of his words are now somehow forever tied to the changes in the weather. If the breeze is pleasant, somehow it reminds me of that specific day/time when I was with him and I remember the breeze felt exactly the same way. So, no, what you are saying doesn't sound ridiculous to me. Nice weather = triggers for happy memories happy memories = triggers for pain since the person is gone. End result: nice weather = pain. But it's so sad, because nice weather is usually something that can help to alleviate depression, instead it turns to aggravate the depression. Your post resonated with me so much. It helped me make sense of what I was feeling exactly. Thank you. It sucks though. I hope we can all get through this, and start to disassociate from this pain, and find happiness once more. Sometimes I like to think that my ex is making the most out of this weather, while I'm cooped away to motivate myself to not feel this way, and aim to better my situation; sometimes it works. 2
amaysngrace Posted March 9, 2016 Posted March 9, 2016 Do you have music and headphones and good shoes to walk in? Get yourself out there!! I'm sorry about your bike. I hope the chain fell off. 1
Author Dontfindme Posted March 11, 2016 Author Posted March 11, 2016 Do you have music and headphones and good shoes to walk in? Get yourself out there!! I'm sorry about your bike. I hope the chain fell off. I do! I have all of those things. Thanks Amaysngrace! Your responses make me feel like there is hope yet. 1
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