idontknow1234 Posted March 7, 2016 Posted March 7, 2016 I don't know anything about this forum. I hope I've come to the right place, I just need to write about this. Okay, so I just need some help. I'm around 17 years old (no, my profile age isn't true. I'm trying to be atleast a bit anonymous haha) Like 2 weeks ago i met this girl at a party. She was really cute and we talked for some time before eventually splitting up. She seemed a bit interested in me. A few hours later we met again (we were both drunk at that point) and started making out. We made out a few more times during the party, it was great. The only thing that made it feel a bit wrong was that she said like "oh we're gonna regret this later" several times. Anyway, I made her add me on Facebook before I left. A few days later I tried to write to her using Facebook messenger, but it kinda failed since it turned out she barely uses Facebook. But that didn't really matter because the next weekend (only a few days ago when writing this) we met at another party. This time things went to a new level. Not sexually but we made out numerous times, and we cuddled in a couch while kissing and talking about stuff. She wanted me to sleep over at the party like she would but I really couldn't. (The reason for sleeping over was not to have sex, it was just so that we could talk while sober next morning). At the beginning of the second party I got her number. During this party it literally felt like true love (we weren't that drunk, either). Next day I texted her. But now she seems extremely uninterested in me. She anwers like a few times a day! I've made her write stuff like "hahahah" few times but come on, if she was interested she would write alot more often, right? I've never tried to text a girl before, but I'm trying my best. I don't think I'm good, but I'm sure I don't suck THAT much. Also, I'm almost entirely sure she doesn't have a boyfriend. It feels like she's very unexperienced (like I am). So, what do you guys think? It feels like every text she sends will be the last one. For example, she hasn't answered to my last text for like 4 hours. Should I do something if she stops answering completly? Because I was almost a 100 % sure that we had something last party. (also I have a really hard time finding someone that really seems to like me, and I'm kinda sad over this girl since I really thought we had something tbh). And yeah, english isn't my first language so sorry for any mistakes, I haven't really cared about correcting any mistakes.
mrs rubble Posted March 7, 2016 Posted March 7, 2016 Why don't you give her a call instead? Texting and messaging can drive you nuts wondering how to interpret what is being said, tone of voice can change the whole way a written conversation sounds and is meant. 1
Author idontknow1234 Posted March 7, 2016 Author Posted March 7, 2016 (edited) Thanks for answering! I hope this is the right way of answering you I was actually thinking of calling her instead of texting in the first place. I do have the guts to call her, but she seems kind of shy and unsure, and quite inexperienced. I'm afraid a a call would be to sudden and that she would feel pressured to either say yes or no. But if you insist, I will probably call her soon! Edit: changed from pressed to pressured Edited March 7, 2016 by idontknow1234 2
mrs rubble Posted March 7, 2016 Posted March 7, 2016 Thanks for answering! I hope this is the right way of answering you I was actually thinking of calling her instead of texting in the first place. I do have the guts to call her, but she seems kind of shy and unsure, and quite inexperienced. I'm afraid a a call would be to sudden and that she would feel pressured to either say yes or no. But if you insist, I will probably call her soon! Edit: changed from pressed to pressured Good luck! At least you'll get a better idea of how she feels hearing her talk.
Author idontknow1234 Posted March 8, 2016 Author Posted March 8, 2016 Hi! I created a thread yesterday about whether a girl liked me or not. Seems like she does. I'm just going to write a really fast summary. Im around 17 (my profile age isn't true, I wanna be atleast a bit anonymous haha). A few weeks ago I met a really cute girl at a party. We made out. Next weekend I met her again. We made out and cuddled and talk about stuff. Then I started texting her. After a while the conversation started flowing and eventually I asked her out, just for coffee or something. She says that she really, really wants to but she doesn't dare since she's "too awkward while sober" (both times we've met we've been fairly drunk). So, I think it's kind of obvious that she's atleast a bit interested in me. But, how should I continue our conversation? I've played it really cool so far, saying stuff like "oh thats perfectly fine! We can bring it up later instead!" To this she's answered "Yeah, but it feels frustrating since I want to meet you but can't since I dont dare". What are your tips? Should I try to convince her or just play it really cool and start talking about something else? Please, I really really like this girl!!
GenuineAttraction Posted March 8, 2016 Posted March 8, 2016 Two things could be happening. If she was older I'd say she's just not that interested in you and she's trying to be nice, while having a drinking problem. Since she's 16-18 or thereabouts, she may like you, and genuinely feels this way. You would give the same response in either case. First, determine if you want to be with someone who is only fun while they drink. If the answer is YES! Then stop texting her all the time. You're going to chase her away from you and you'll be confused. Hit her up in a few days and ask her out again. No idle chit chat. Make a definite date. If she says no, I'm too shy, say something clever. Then leave her alone for another week. If she contacts you first then make a date, no idle chit chat. If you can't get her on a date after 3 times let her go, she's not that into you and just wants someone to text with, or she wants you to be her "friend." Oh and start dating other women, you barely know this girl and you are already sold on her.
spriggan2 Posted March 8, 2016 Posted March 8, 2016 Tell her you love awkward or don't mind awkward. Tell her the awkwardness won't disappear unless she gets over the initial phase of getting to know you. Tell her you want more than a text and drinking relationship, if she doesn't that's fine, but it's not for you. Tell her you'll kiss her whenever things get awkward or something. Fck knows...just don't stall. Its a waste of your time imo. Figure our if she's willing to go on sober dates with you, if not, ditch her.
Redhead14 Posted March 8, 2016 Posted March 8, 2016 Hi! I created a thread yesterday about whether a girl liked me or not. Seems like she does. I'm just going to write a really fast summary. Im around 17 (my profile age isn't true, I wanna be atleast a bit anonymous haha). A few weeks ago I met a really cute girl at a party. We made out. Next weekend I met her again. We made out and cuddled and talk about stuff. Then I started texting her. After a while the conversation started flowing and eventually I asked her out, just for coffee or something. She says that she really, really wants to but she doesn't dare since she's "too awkward while sober" (both times we've met we've been fairly drunk). So, I think it's kind of obvious that she's atleast a bit interested in me. But, how should I continue our conversation? I've played it really cool so far, saying stuff like "oh thats perfectly fine! We can bring it up later instead!" To this she's answered "Yeah, but it feels frustrating since I want to meet you but can't since I dont dare". What are your tips? Should I try to convince her or just play it really cool and start talking about something else? Please, I really really like this girl!! You want to date someone who can't be with or comfortable with someone without being drunk????? You will be dating a "dual-personality" and always confused about her feelings and so will she. Acts one way when she's drunk and seems to pull away when she's not drunk. That's not going to be fun.
Author idontknow1234 Posted March 8, 2016 Author Posted March 8, 2016 Thanks for the answers! Most of you mentioned that she isn't worth it if she's only interesting/funny while drunk. Well, that's obvious! One of the reasons I wanna meet her is to see how she is when she's "normal". Also, I'm pretty sure it will turn out alright when/if we actually meet. She thinks it's going to be weird and awkward the entire "date", I need to know how to make her feel secure enough to meet.
Redhead14 Posted March 8, 2016 Posted March 8, 2016 Thanks for the answers! Most of you mentioned that she isn't worth it if she's only interesting/funny while drunk. Well, that's obvious! One of the reasons I wanna meet her is to see how she is when she's "normal". Also, I'm pretty sure it will turn out alright when/if we actually meet. She thinks it's going to be weird and awkward the entire "date", I need to know how to make her feel secure enough to meet. Well, if she doesn't feel more secure about meeting by virtue of you asking her, there's not a whole heck of a lot you can do. I'd just keep in contact with her and communicate for a while and not while drinking until a little more trust can be fostered, then ask her.
Author idontknow1234 Posted March 29, 2016 Author Posted March 29, 2016 Hi! I've already made 2 threads about the same girl but I need some help again haha. So basically I'm 17 years old, I've met a girl as old as me at a couple of parties and we've made out during both of them. We then started texting, I asked her out after a couple of days of texting. She said she was too shy to meet. Since then we've been texting, and now, 2 weeks later, I finally asked her out again, "just for a coffee or something." And she said yes. However, she also told me that she's very busy this week, so we'll have to meet next week or so. Today is tuesday. Is this planning too far ahead? Should we plan everything now and then wait, or should I wait for some time before bringing up the topic again?
mike_89 Posted March 29, 2016 Posted March 29, 2016 Just plan it on like the Thursday and after that keep contact by texting once a day or so.
Author idontknow1234 Posted April 7, 2016 Author Posted April 7, 2016 HEY! I'm a guy. I really like a girl. We're both 17 and we've met 3 times, kissing, making out, holding hands and hugging and so on everytime. However, we've both been a bit drunk all those times. Tomorrow we're gonna meet for coffee. IF the date goes extremely well and I feel like it's a good idea, should I go for a kiss at the bus stop afterwards? Or is that just not socially acceptable after only one date? (despite the fact that we've done it several times before)
DreamP Posted April 7, 2016 Posted April 7, 2016 Ask her. It's not about what is socially acceptable. It's about what is acceptable to you and her.
Author idontknow1234 Posted April 7, 2016 Author Posted April 7, 2016 Ask her. It's not about what is socially acceptable. It's about what is acceptable to you and her. That's true, but wouldn't that be a bit lame and unromantic? *we're just about to say goodbye* *our eyes meet* *HEY CAN I KISS U?* Kind of lame to be honest :/
TXGuy Posted April 7, 2016 Posted April 7, 2016 I think it is a good idea to try to kiss her if things go well after your 'day-date.' I think it will show you actually like her and not just when you have been drinking. (I'll refrain from an underage drinking lecture-I'm sure you have heard it before). Just make sure not to 'mug' her out of the blue. Assuming your date goes well, at the end of it: - from a face to face position - make and maintain eye contact (make sure your face is 'friendly') - say something about how you enjoyed spending the day with her. - lean in toward her, but stop short of kissing her (maintaining eye contact). ---If she leans in toward you, kiss her. ---If she leans back, turns away, etc, then back off or just go for a friendly hug.
Eighty_nine Posted April 7, 2016 Posted April 7, 2016 you really have to try to read her. if she seems like she is up for a kiss, go for it; if she seems shy, or uninterested, or just isn't giving off vibes that you should kiss right now, then don't.
DreamP Posted April 7, 2016 Posted April 7, 2016 That's true, but wouldn't that be a bit lame and unromantic? *we're just about to say goodbye* *our eyes meet* *HEY CAN I KISS U?* Kind of lame to be honest :/ I don't understand why teenagers think asking for consent is lame. IT IS NOT! It shows the girl that you respect her to ask permission before doing anything. Also, there is not doubt on your end whether you should or not. Hollywood movies are just that, movies. The perfect moment when you both can read each other's mind and know you both want to kiss is BS. If you are not sure about whether you can kiss her or not, then you NEED to ask for permission. Also, it can be extremely sexy.
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