LT1985 Posted March 8, 2016 Posted March 8, 2016 Im at my breaking point… Not sure if anyone has read my articles about by break up and how I’m struggling, but yea. So one of the reasons behind the break up was apparently because when i was out of work i didn’t put much effort in at home when her dad was sick. (I don’t believe this to be the case , but hey) So I’ve been on stress leave since July 2015 from my work due to code of conduct breaches which were out right lies. Due to the likely hood of them terminating my employment i resigned in January as i had already spent $9,000 on lawyers fighting it ran out of leave. My mental health was at a all time low. I was 4 months short of my long service leave and they didn’t even give me that. So I’ve been applying for job after job after job. Getting interviews etc but no luck until i got one, wasn’t perfect but it was a job. However today they called and said they are reviewing my employment offer as upon confirming my referees employment they were notified about my Code of Conduct issues by HR (Which is illegal, but my mental health isn’t in a good enough state to go through a fight with them.) So now I’m back to no job, bills, and where i thought i would get her off my mind for at least 8 hrs a day is not the case. Its a massive kick in the guts again. Further to this, i sent her a email the other night saying i was attending meetings for people affected by ACoC. I don’t believe i have it but she openly admits she does. I thought this maybe a reason to get some closure as she won’t give me any. I got a email reply a day and a half later just attacking me for going. So she had obviously had a bad day and decided to make mine worse. Further to this we had a dinner planned at this expensive restaurant for this weekend which was purchased ages ago. So as she said she didn’t want to go i offered it to her sister and husband as they need a night out due to some personal reasons and that they have been there for me. So yea she abused her sister saying as if your going that was meant for me and luke. The sister then told me maybe you should ask her if she would like to go as she seemed like she want to.. So sucked up my pride asked… Further to be slapped in the face again… All of this has just put be further into a hole of depression...
Heatemyheart89 Posted March 8, 2016 Posted March 8, 2016 (edited) Hey. I saw your post and I can really empathise with it . I have had to leave a job and I am dealing with the ex thing. Two majorly awful things. I think there is a few things here that need to be sorted out. Firstly your mental health, are you receiving any help for this? Therapy/ medication etc. As for the job thing ahh, I feel bad for you. Are they still reviewing your employment offer? Don't give up hope yet, keep applying for jobs. I think the ex is not good for you by the sound of it. I think in time the pain will ease but this is a rough patch for you. Try, if you possibly can to take the focus off of her and place it back onto you and re-building you. Edited March 8, 2016 by Heatemyheart89
Bee4Shine Posted March 10, 2016 Posted March 10, 2016 I am sorry for the struggle you are having. It seems to always pour when it rains. You are in one of those phases of life. What steps can you take to improve your situation? Getting a reasonable grip on how people are impacting you might be a good first step. Is she determined to break up with you? Are you willing to step aside and allow her to go? Sometimes the tighter we hang on - the more they want to go, and when we let go they wonder and question their need to run. Maybe you can make a plan to move forward, find any job that will tide you over for the time being, so you can put your efforts into looking for the right job. Easing the stress and depression you are feeling could be a good step forward. Have you sought counseling? I know that costs money, sometimes it can really be helpful for getting back on track.
bathtub-row Posted March 10, 2016 Posted March 10, 2016 Really, really sorry to hear about what you've been through. It sounds like quite a nightmare. Also I hate when people seem so unreasonable and attack for the dumbest things. I guess you've already thought of this, but is there any way you could go into business for yourself? That's usually the best route anyway so that you control your fate and no one else does.
Author LT1985 Posted March 10, 2016 Author Posted March 10, 2016 Yea im going to counciling, which is helping and applying for more jobs each day, So fingers crossed something comes up soon. As for her.. Who knows, as much as i love her and would love her back. I dont know if i could get over the damage she has done to our relationship during the breaking up period, So i am accepting it more and more day by day but doesnt stop me missing everything about her.
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