Amor289 Posted March 8, 2016 Posted March 8, 2016 The love of my life had an intense 2 year relationship. Its one that just got better by the month. My ex was an arrogant guy where he think fighting is just not on. We had a fight which derived from me telling him that I didn't feel that I was being cared for enough by him. Over a fight in December it ended with him telling me that he had had enough and that I had ruined everything, that I had destroyed the his "perfect picture of us" and that he resents me. I was so devastated that I went to a psychologist. I kept in touch with the ex the week after the break up where we got on ok with just the "hey what are you up to questions" Then one night he told me " Stop telling me you love me, we are not together any more you need to respect my space". I was so hurt and felt so rejected that I went in to NC. Then a day later he called me to ask how I was as if nothing had happened. I told told him that I would go on a holiday for 3 weeks overseas and if was keen to work things out that he can reach out to me after I get back, if he disagreed then he can tell me now and I'll completely let go. He didn't reply. Its been three weeks now and he still hadn't replied. He also said during the break up that he would return my things after my trip. why? its not like he's busy as he is in between jobs he could have sent my stuff back right away instead of waiting. Anyway, i am 22 days in to the 30 days of NC, back from the trip now, still hadn't heard from him, hadn't gotten my stuff sent back. I guess I just want to know how you guys read in to this. Remember we are a very compatible couple. Both of us work in the same industry, same drive, same goals, same temper, same hobbies.... I don't know. I just don't know. I am a stockbroker with an in come three times that of his. I own a condo, a sports car, I keep fit going to the gym 5 times a week and yet I am a down to earth person who lives within my means. I am always concious of how my actions make others feel. I am just so gutted that some one can still take my love and abandon me like this. Can someone share some successful NC stories to give me some confidence back? Thank you 1
Jim nine three Posted March 8, 2016 Posted March 8, 2016 Many people have had exes come back to them,many haven't.No Contact is not applied to make the other person miss you and want you back.Not talking to your ex for 10,20,30,60 days is not gonna make your ex miss you and want you back.The purpose of No Contact is to create separation between the two of you in order to heal and move on with your life.Any other use is actually manipulative,making the other person miss you on purpose usually backfires.Don't go down that path. Be honest with your feelings.If you really want him back and haven't discussed it with him do so,but be prepared for the possibility of rejection.Tell him you want to continue seeing him and be together.If the answer is no,there is nothing more you can really do,walk away and never look back. Otherwise ask for your stuff back and keep up with No Contact in order to move on with your life.Remember using manipulation to get back with someone will end up badly for both parties in the long run. Whatever your decision,take care.Remember everything in life happens for a reason! 2
Satu Posted March 8, 2016 Posted March 8, 2016 Using NC like that is like "make them jealous," and the other game-playing tricks that some people resort to. You can't make someone feel what you want them to feel. You can't make them want something they don't want. Take care. 1
elaine567 Posted March 8, 2016 Posted March 8, 2016 (edited) He seems to have made it perfectly plain that he is done with you, nothing you write says otherwise, sorry! Relationships can often run their course, no matter how perfect they may be on paper, resentment is often a killer. I think going no contact here will allow you to heal and move on. Edited March 8, 2016 by elaine567 removed quote text 1
Satu Posted March 8, 2016 Posted March 8, 2016 snip The love of my life had an intense 2 year relationship. Its one that just got better by the month. My ex was an arrogant guy where he think fighting is just not on. We had a fight which derived from me telling him that I didn't feel that I was being cared for enough by him. Over a fight in December it ended with him telling me that he had had enough and that I had ruined everything, that I had destroyed the his "perfect picture of us" and that he resents me. Thank you Too many fights.
Satu Posted March 8, 2016 Posted March 8, 2016 (edited) deleted. posted to the wrong thread by mistake. Edited March 8, 2016 by Satu
keiji Posted March 8, 2016 Posted March 8, 2016 I've had success, absolutely, but maybe not the kind you're looking for. I've been in NC with my ex-girlfriend for over a month and a half now. She hasn't come back to me (she was actually sleeping with someone else when we last spoke. So much for "the love of her life", that being me) nor has she contacted me. I won't contact her either. So yes, it's a huge success, because I've managed to stay away from the source of pain, I've started a very fruitful therapy, I've met other people, I'm working a lot on myself on a personal level and I've realized what I already knew: I can live without her. I'm not saying it's easy to detach from someone you've loved so much, but they don't want us in their life. That's the sad truth. Success in NC is about you and only you. 2
Satu Posted March 8, 2016 Posted March 8, 2016 No contact is about two things, and two things only: 1. It protects you from further hurt. 2. It allows you to heal from a breakup without being distracted by the ex. Thats all it is, and all it does.
Recommended Posts