Simon Phoenix Posted March 4, 2016 Posted March 4, 2016 (edited) It's not awful behavior to block someone you've broken up with. It is inappropriate behavior to send gifts to exes, especially when you've just broken up. He's more that justified to block her and that particular action doesn't make him a "pig" or anything related to a pig. He might have been inappropriate in other aspects of the relationship that have not been chronicled on here or that I haven't read, but that's not the issue that was brought up by her ITT. I think the fact that she agreed that sending the present and continuing to try to communicate with him when it clearly wasn't welcome is telling and shows that she knows she overstepped. Does that make her a stalker? No, it doesn't, as long as she doesn't continue on that path. Even the best of us get carried away sometimes, and the OP is not a bad person for showing poor judgement in a stressful time. It seems like she's learned from it and I seriously doubt she'll be repeating this mistake from here forward. Edited March 5, 2016 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Itspointless Posted March 4, 2016 Posted March 4, 2016 It's not awful behavior to block someone you've broken up with. It is inappropriate behavior to send gifts to exes, especially when you've just broken up. I understood her writing in the other thread as that she was not broken up at the time she sent it. Immediately after she suddenly was blocked. Nivy please correct me if I were wrong with my understanding of this. Does that make her a stalker? No, it doesn't, as long as she doesn't continue on that path. Even the best of us get carried away sometimes, and the OP is not a bad person for showing poor judgement in a stressful time. It seems like she's learned from it and I seriously doubt she'll be repeating this mistake from here forward. Yeah, I think that too. As for calling her behavior that way, I have the feeling that the word has a slightly different meaning and weight in my language and country.
katiegrl Posted March 4, 2016 Posted March 4, 2016 Yes I know who I am, I already wrote that. And after looking back, I see that something in my sentence has been mixed up in a strange way. It is there twice, while I only wanted to write in the first sentence. Yes I do not know the whole story. At that time I had read both threads and still I find it awful behavior to block someone because she sent a present he did her ask not to sent. I sympathized with Nivv and can understand how it drives you (a bit) mad. I am a but surprised with the strong reactions about the word I used but OK, lesson learned. If I broke some rules on the board than I sincerely apologize for that. As for the word stalking I think Apparition has made his point, I agree with his feelings about that word. No worries Ip...I still like you.... :laugh: And I agree about the stalking too. I only used it as that is how it was being described. However, she does need to tone it down a bit....cuz IMO she pushed him away. Lesson learned for her too.
Itspointless Posted March 4, 2016 Posted March 4, 2016 No worries Ip...I still like you.... :laugh: Lol, thanks Katie, I was afraid that I needed to take some English lessons again. However, she does need to tone it down a bit....cuz IMO she pushed him away. Yes, that is a real possibility.
Author Nivy Posted March 5, 2016 Author Posted March 5, 2016 (edited) [T]o them who are thinking I sent him the gift after we broke up.....no...it didn't go like that. When he sent me a good luck token, that time only I told him that I'll send him something nice. But he said not to. Then I said that "I know you like cookies, I'll bake them myself for you and send " to which he replied "Then its okay!". And judging this, I sent him those cookies. When I told him that you were okay with it he said "Even if I tell you I'm okay with it, you simply shouldn't have sent it". Now, something I noticed out of nowhere. Since people were stating that I can become a stalker, from that day onwards I stopped checking his profile. Plus he has blocked me. Every time I open his profile it shows that I am blocked and it hurts, so I thought why hurt myself more! So, last night, I accidentally opened the page where twitter shows who logged in from where. Now, he has my password. I found that he has logged in everyday into my account since the day he broke up. EVERYDAY AT-LEAST 5 TIMES. What do you guys think is going on? I don't know why but it kinda made me feel that he hasn't forgotten me and this has made me happy and given me the spirit of not contacting him anymore! So tell me, what do you really think? Why he logs into my account everyday? Edited March 5, 2016 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Paragraphs and remove off-topic content
Simon Phoenix Posted March 5, 2016 Posted March 5, 2016 (edited) You are asking the wrong question here. You should be angry about having your privacy compromised and change your password ASAP. This is not a good thing and not a thing you should be asking about. If anything, this should piss you off. Edited March 5, 2016 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Removed full quote of immediately preceding post
Author Nivy Posted March 7, 2016 Author Posted March 7, 2016 (edited) Yep I have got a sudden boost to continue NC from a single thing that I noticed. After we broke up and he blocked me everywhere, I just found out that he keeps logging into my account daily at least five times. The day I saw this, it made me kinda happy because I thought that he hasn't completely forgotten about me. But now as days are passing by I have started to feel this thing - "If you blocked me, you did that for a reason. Now why log into my account everyday if you have to keep me blocked?". This honestly makes no sense to me. I know I shouldn't keep my hopes higher but this again made me feel that he is keeping a tab on things I am doing and perhaps secretly wishing too that I don't date someone else. Sometimes his behaviors does surprise and confuse me. It has confused me this time too. But on a better note, this kinda motivates me to keep up with NC as I want to see how long he keeps doing this. I have stopped seeing his social media profiles and have even stopped checking what he is posting and when he is waking up etc etc. And I am following NC because if it not helps to patch us up together at least it'll make me heal. What do you people think of this situation? Edited March 7, 2016 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Paragraphs, merge similar threads, retitle to update
ExpatInItaly Posted March 7, 2016 Posted March 7, 2016 I don't understand, which account is he logging into? What were the circumstances of your breakup? I don't know, but I would find anyone logging into any account of mine to be quite invasive and I would not tolerate that. Unless I have completely misunderstood what you meant.
Simon Phoenix Posted March 7, 2016 Posted March 7, 2016 Why haven't you changed your password to this account exactly?
Author Nivy Posted March 7, 2016 Author Posted March 7, 2016 I don't understand, which account is he logging into? What were the circumstances of your breakup? I don't know, but I would find anyone logging into any account of mine to be quite invasive and I would not tolerate that. Unless I have completely misunderstood what you meant. My account. He has my password because we both work as content writer on social media and when I was busy or unwell, he would sometimes finish my work. And after the breakup I completely forgot that he has my password.
Author Nivy Posted March 7, 2016 Author Posted March 7, 2016 Why haven't you changed your password to this account exactly? Coz I myself didn't remember that he has it and after our break up I was so involved with grieving and crying that I completely forgot about it. Should I change the password?
ExpatInItaly Posted March 7, 2016 Posted March 7, 2016 My account. He has my password because we both work as content writer on social media and when I was busy or unwell, he would sometimes finish my work. And after the breakup I completely forgot that he has my password. Yes, I understand that. But what I meant was your account for what? Facebook? Loveshack? Email? Change your password.
Author Nivy Posted March 7, 2016 Author Posted March 7, 2016 I don't understand, which account is he logging into? What were the circumstances of your breakup? I don't know, but I would find anyone logging into any account of mine to be quite invasive and I would not tolerate that. Unless I have completely misunderstood what you meant. This is what happened! Hello guys, I am 23years old female from India. I have (or should I say had) a long distance relationship with my boyfriend. Before my exams he sent me a Parker Pen as a token of good luck. I always knew he liked cookies, so after my exams were over, I baked a box full of cookies for him. Now just before I was going to send it to him, he told me not to send it coz he doesn't like gifts or anything. I thought, he might be happy after getting it and I couriered it anyway. After receiving the package, he blocked me everywhere and told me not to contact him again. I mailed him saying that I was sorry but he didn't listen. After a day, he had unblocked me but didn't talk to me. I kept on texting him, calling him but everything went unanswered. This continued for 3 weeks until 4 days back I nagged the **** out of him. I constantly begged and pleaded for an hour and that enraged him. He told me that I was now harassing him and it was his biggest mistake that he unblocked me. He even said that "I've learnt a great lesson now". And then again he blocked me everywhere. He blocked my calls too. Then I wrote him a mail stating how embarrassed I was about my behavior. He then replied "I am not in state to love.....I'll tell you everything one day....till then don't contact me." I didn't contact him since that day. I am trying to go for NC but its hard. I uninstalled whatsapp. I don't check facebook. But I have to be on twitter coz I help trending contents there. In twitter I find it hard not to check his profile. I click on his name and find me blocked everyday. I was holding up good since yesterday but today I have this strong urge of contacting him. So, I joined this forum and I hope you all can give me a little insight into how to handle all of this situation and all. Thank you everybody
Author Nivy Posted March 7, 2016 Author Posted March 7, 2016 Did you ever meet him in person? no. Never. We talked over the phone but never met him in person.
ExpatInItaly Posted March 7, 2016 Posted March 7, 2016 no. Never. We talked over the phone but never met him in person. Then, to be blunt, this guy was never a boyfriend. You have no idea who you're really dealing with. He could be married for all you know. In fact, I imagine this is why he didn't want you mailing him anything and proceeded to block you when you did anyway. I would change your password immediately.
Recommended Posts