whatwhit Posted March 6, 2016 Posted March 6, 2016 Hello All, In today's world do you think if a guy or girl kisses you on a first date, does that really mean anything? Also, should a girl text a "thank you" text after the first date? I've read that texting after is a big no no , but I've also seen where guys seem to prefer it. Went on a first date with this guy last night, he kissed me. I asked if he wanted to hang again he said he did - but didn't set a date Thanks!!
fitnessfan365 Posted March 6, 2016 Posted March 6, 2016 Well first of all, the date was last night. So be a bit more patient and actually give the guy time to follow up. Now I can only speak for myself. But if I kiss a woman on a first date it's because I want to see her again and I think she feels the same way. It's the best way to make sure we're on the same page. Luckily my instincts have always served me well. With that said, I've always set a second date regardless of whether I got a "thank you" text or not. Mainly because her interest seemed like common sense after kissing. 4
d0nnivain Posted March 6, 2016 Posted March 6, 2016 As a woman I like to be kissed on the 1st date. In the absence of a kiss, I am left wondering if the guy likes me. As I understand it texting a thank you after the date has become a signal to the guy that it's OK to call again. You are giving him sort of a green light. With any of these so called "rules", it's really all about your personal confort level and what feels right to you.
scooby-philly Posted March 6, 2016 Posted March 6, 2016 Agreed with the previous posters. A kiss should happen within the first 5 dates. Without that, there's no real "spark" unless the guy is totally, totally awkward or shy but even then, if he can't overcome that to kiss someone he's attracted to...... I don't hold to the whole concept of playing hard to get after each of the first few dates. If you want to say how you feel, say it. It certainly clears the air early on.
Author whatwhit Posted March 6, 2016 Author Posted March 6, 2016 Thanks for the input! I've had guys, ok one guy kiss me and it turned out he didn't think we were fit. I think that might of been cause I stayed the night ( didn't do anything) but idk. Should I text him today thanking him for the date or should I give him a couple days and then text him say on Wednesday?
d0nnivain Posted March 7, 2016 Posted March 7, 2016 The thank you text should come close in time to the event you are saying thank you about. Next Wednesday would be a good time to reach out on a more substantive level.
Author whatwhit Posted March 7, 2016 Author Posted March 7, 2016 So I text him, Happy Monday! So Saturday was fun, Oliver and I had a great time! ( Oliver is my dog) He replied back minutes after and was like, "hey you. Happy Monday, and yeah Riley and I had a great time too. ( Riley is his dog ). I texted him, would you be interested in a repeat? I'll leave Oliver home. No response yet - hopefully that sounds ok. I remember when we first started talking and I asked if he wanted to hang he was like, " I'm going to pretend you didn't ask that" and he asked me. So, if he doesn't respond should I just, not trying to be forward but I don't like to waste time, but we already kissed so I'm not sure how I'm being forward. Ugh!!! Dating is fun . .
d0nnivain Posted March 7, 2016 Posted March 7, 2016 Your reply sounds perfect: pithy, mirthful, no pressure but clear that you want to meet again.
Author whatwhit Posted March 7, 2016 Author Posted March 7, 2016 Should I say anything if he doesn't respond like, hopefully I'm not being too forward, or idk just let it go?
wildsunandmoon Posted March 7, 2016 Posted March 7, 2016 I think you were very direct and that you text doesn't warrant you a follow up text. The ball is in his court. Try to tone down your eagerness and let it happen naturally!
Larryville Posted March 7, 2016 Posted March 7, 2016 In today's world do you think if a guy or girl kisses you on a first date, does that really mean anything? Also, should a girl text a "thank you" text after the first date? I've read that texting after is a big no no , but I've also seen where guys seem to prefer it. A kiss should happen within the first 5 dates. Wow I think 5 dates (within) is seriously too long, to me it comes down to economics and time. You are going to know (from a guy’s perspective) pretty much right away if he is into you. As many experts say a woman will mirror and/or find an excuse to touch you. The body language and eye contact should be obvious. I say get it out of the way so you don’t waste your time and money on coffee dates or whatever… do the math how much do these encounters cost you? Also going home wondering after each encounter. It just drives you crazy and will cause you to second guess yourself. Try to tone down your eagerness and let it happen naturally! Absolutely!
zenguy Posted March 7, 2016 Posted March 7, 2016 A kiss is usually a positive sign, yeah. As for the reaction to you saying "hang", it could just be that he's just avoiding the friend zone. And wants to date you, not simply "hang".
Author whatwhit Posted March 7, 2016 Author Posted March 7, 2016 I don't think he's going respond - don't get it why do guys kiss girls they're not into??
Author whatwhit Posted March 7, 2016 Author Posted March 7, 2016 Actually he texted me back asking if I'm free Wednesday night! But heck Wednesday night who asks someone out on a weekday???
AnnaGem Posted March 7, 2016 Posted March 7, 2016 Actually he texted me back asking if I'm free Wednesday night! But heck Wednesday night who asks someone out on a weekday??? Because Wednesday is closer than Saturday and he wants to see you again soon? I see nothing wrong with weekday dates. 2
d0nnivain Posted March 7, 2016 Posted March 7, 2016 Actually he texted me back asking if I'm free Wednesday night! But heck Wednesday night who asks someone out on a weekday??? A guy who doesn't want to wait to the weekend to see you. Stop seeing the rain cloud & look for the silver lining. 1
thecrucible Posted March 7, 2016 Posted March 7, 2016 I agree with the two above posts. Go for it! Never mind making a rule that he must ask you out for the weekend. If you want to see him and you're free, then go see him.
Miss Peach Posted March 7, 2016 Posted March 7, 2016 Well first of all, the date was last night. So be a bit more patient and actually give the guy time to follow up. Now I can only speak for myself. But if I kiss a woman on a first date it's because I want to see her again and I think she feels the same way. It's the best way to make sure we're on the same page. Luckily my instincts have always served me well. With that said, I've always set a second date regardless of whether I got a "thank you" text or not. Mainly because her interest seemed like common sense after kissing. This. I prefer to thank the man and tell him I had a good time, etc. I don't like to send a separate text thanking because to me that's like chasing and fishing for attention. If a man wants to see me again he'll contact me for a second date.
Miss Peach Posted March 7, 2016 Posted March 7, 2016 Actually he texted me back asking if I'm free Wednesday night! But heck Wednesday night who asks someone out on a weekday??? I have always found the majority of guys tend to ask for weekday dates until they have seen you a few times.
Author whatwhit Posted March 8, 2016 Author Posted March 8, 2016 I could be just being paranoid - but he's being extra long with text responses. I guess that's the downside of asking a guy out for the second date is that you never know if they were truly interested. Has anyone had a successful relationship where you initiated the second date or any date. Conversation yesterday Me: Happy Monday, so Oliver and I had a great time on Saturday Him: hey you, happy Monday, yeah Riley and I had a great time too Me: would you be interested in a repeat? I'll leave Oliver at home ::: did hear from him for a few hours::: Me: hopefully I am not being too forward - I remember the last time I asked to hang out you told me that you were going to pretend I didn't ask. ( when I asked him to hang the first time he didn't seem to excited about it so I stopped texting him. But then a few days after he asked if we were still on so technically he asked to hang out, Him: haha, it's fine, are you free Wednesday night
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