Mjm1014 Posted March 4, 2016 Posted March 4, 2016 Okay so I've come to the conclusion, I suck when it comes to dating. I'm constantly being rejected, and it's usually after they get to know me. I'm not exactly sure what I'm doing wrong, I always treat women with respect, but for some reason they seem to get bored and change their minds. Even the last girl I was in a relationship seemed to get bored and we ended it 6 months in. There was a girl I was seeing about a year ago (we talked about 4 months, became good friends-but she never wanted to make it official-we did sleep together though), and I was thinking about asking her why she rejected me. I'm NOT trying to get her back, but trying to get some positive feedback where I'm going wrong with the ladies. I figured I'd ask her since its cooled off since then and there is no feelings there between either of us anymore. Do you think this would put her too much on the spot? I'm really looking for ways to improve and have no idea where I'm going wrong with all these women lol Good or bad idea?
yxalitis Posted March 4, 2016 Posted March 4, 2016 Okay so I've come to the conclusion, I suck when it comes to dating. I'm constantly being rejected, and it's usually after they get to know me. I'm not exactly sure what I'm doing wrong, I always treat women with respect, but for some reason they seem to get bored and change their minds. Even the last girl I was in a relationship seemed to get bored and we ended it 6 months in. There was a girl I was seeing about a year ago (we talked about 4 months, became good friends-but she never wanted to make it official-we did sleep together though), and I was thinking about asking her why she rejected me. I'm NOT trying to get her back, but trying to get some positive feedback where I'm going wrong with the ladies. I figured I'd ask her since its cooled off since then and there is no feelings there between either of us anymore. Do you think this would put her too much on the spot? I'm really looking for ways to improve and have no idea where I'm going wrong with all these women lol Good or bad idea? I can tell you what's wrong already... You have no confidence. The very idea that you need to seek help from some girl you bonked once to improve yourself reeks of insecurity. HOW to get over that is a voluminous subject...
Jabron1 Posted March 4, 2016 Posted March 4, 2016 I always treat women with respect Uh-huh but for some reason they seem to get bored and change their minds You are probably trying to ingratiate yourself to women too much. Try an experiment with the next girl you go out with. Do whatever makes you happy. Be completely selfish. Go where you want to go on dates. If you want to kiss her, just do it. Don't ask permission for anything. If you forget to reply to a text for 10 hours, oh well... Just try to approach things from a more solipsistic perspective for a short while. 1
yxalitis Posted March 4, 2016 Posted March 4, 2016 Just try to approach things from a more solipsistic perspective for a short while. Man, I had to Google that one!
PacMann87 Posted March 4, 2016 Posted March 4, 2016 First of all you would not be getting positive feedback at all if you asked her this. You're literally asking her to tell you why it didn't work out and what you're flaws are. So that's going to get you negative feedback guaranteed. There's no answer she can tell you that's gonna sound good or make you feel good about yourself. Definitely don't do this. It's been way to long since you stopped seeing her. If you contacted her or ask her this now, you def will come off as a weird, insecure, desperate guy. Don't volunteer that info to a girl out of nowhere. Secondly, no girl you've dated or been with is going to be your life/dating coach and teach you what you're doing wrong and how to fix it. They don't care. You want brutally honest answers from the girls you've been with but truthfully, women don't feel comfortable bashing a guy and telling him things like that. Actually no one does. Which is why when people break up, they say things like "it's not you its me", instead of "you are just getting really fat and I'm not into you anymore " So don't ask people what sucks about you. You need the opposite. When you meet a girl and start talking to her, ask her "so what do you like about me?". If you do it flirtatiously then you are going to get a compliment. Then you obviously tell her what you like about her and wa-lah.. You're both smiling. Lastly... You don't suck at dating. How old are you? You've had girlfriends, you've hooked up with chicks, you've had sex. Do yourself a favor and read through this forum for a few pages. Look at the number of guys who literally have 0 experience with dating and have never kissed a girl. Those guys suck at dating and have real trouble. You just have low self confidence and that's probably noticeable with the girls you're with.
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