Survivor12 Posted March 5, 2016 Posted March 5, 2016 You've been on one date, he's a virgin--and he's talking about having KIDS with you?!?!? Do you not see the weirdness in that? I am curious, though. What makes you believe that he is so "into" you & not just looking for a volunteer to play a part in his plan to have a wife and family? You don't really even know each other yet! 1
preraph Posted March 5, 2016 Posted March 5, 2016 Just remember you're setting the precedent for going forward with these long calls all the time. That's going to get old as soon as you run out of new things to talk about and then when you pull back, he's going to go nuts because he's probably very uncertain and insecure due to inexperience, at minimum. You ought to set some boundaries now while you can. 1
Author ilovemusic3 Posted March 6, 2016 Author Posted March 6, 2016 You've been on one date, he's a virgin--and he's talking about having KIDS with you?!?!? Do you not see the weirdness in that? I am curious, though. What makes you believe that he is so "into" you & not just looking for a volunteer to play a part in his plan to have a wife and family? You don't really even know each other yet! Well he didn't necessarily say he wants kids with me, just saying he wants them. Well, he calls me everyday, seems happy talking to me and had fun on the date. So, is it bad to somewhat play a role, I mean doesn't everybody? I mean I want someone to date and he likes me. He said he enjoys talking to me and likes I'm not crazy.
Gaeta Posted March 6, 2016 Posted March 6, 2016 OP Hon, if you enjoy this man then keep on dating him. He has done nothing worth dumping him. He's inexperienced and not aware of all the stupid dating rules we live by. It's much better for you to date this man then to deal with a player with a long list of conquests and you're just gonna be # 456 on his list. When I met my ex-husband, that same night, he told his mother he had met the woman he was gonna marry. Of course they all laughed at him. He was not a weirdo or socially awkward, he was just infatuated. We still dated 3 years before getting married so no one rushed in anything. Good luck and enjoy it !
Author ilovemusic3 Posted March 6, 2016 Author Posted March 6, 2016 OP Hon, if you enjoy this man then keep on dating him. He has done nothing worth dumping him. He's inexperienced and not aware of all the stupid dating rules we live by. It's much better for you to date this man then to deal with a player with a long list of conquests and you're just gonna be # 456 on his list. When I met my ex-husband, that same night, he told his mother he had met the woman he was gonna marry. Of course they all laughed at him. He was not a weirdo or socially awkward, he was just infatuated. We still dated 3 years before getting married so no one rushed in anything. Good luck and enjoy it ! Thanks for the advice. Yea, I guess I should just wait and see. I just want to know if things are normal because I am also inexperienced when it comes to dating. I just don't want to end up dating a nut.
Author ilovemusic3 Posted March 7, 2016 Author Posted March 7, 2016 Definitely be on the lookout, not only for clingyness but also for him trying to escalate things quickly. You don't know him well, so he might be building up "credit" with you that he wants to cash in later (i.e. pressure you to go to far physically). This is wrong. Some guys don't realise they're doing it. Try telling him you're not the type of girl who sleeps around in the early stages of a relationship so not to expect sex for awhile. That's a telltale way to see if that's what he's after (even if he says he's not). If he's only after that then he will duck out the backdoor! Well, I don't think he's after that exactly. He told me he wants to wait until he's in a serious relationship and since he is a Christian he says he values waiting. He pretty much said he's a virgin and told me to tell him if he's moving too slow.
Author ilovemusic3 Posted March 7, 2016 Author Posted March 7, 2016 We talked tonight for an hour, yesterday he texted me saying he was out with friends and he couldn't call until 9:30. Well I was out until 12, so we didn't talk yesterday. Tomorrow we're going to a mall and dinner. He told me the whole day was mine. It just makes me nervous because no guy has ever been so interested in me before. Most guys don't like me after the first date, so I just am concerned something is wrong with this guy. Everything seems fine, but is it?
ff12343 Posted March 7, 2016 Posted March 7, 2016 Most guys don't like me after the first date, so I just am concerned something is wrong with this guy. Everything seems fine, but is it? What's with the insecurity? Play it slow.
Author ilovemusic3 Posted March 8, 2016 Author Posted March 8, 2016 So we went out tonight and we had a good time, and we seem to like each other. We were talking and he started to say how the longest relationship he's had was 3 dates and that he has never kissed a girl before. He did go to a Christian college, so the most guys and girls could do there is hold hands. He is 30 now though. He said he doesn't always know when it's time to kiss a girl and he doesn't want to be rejected. Is this okay? Is it weird? I'm not that experienced either, but I have done sexual things with a guy before. Thoughts please?
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