katiegrl Posted March 4, 2016 Posted March 4, 2016 (edited) I always treat good people well. I just say something like 'sorry, you're a cool person, but I don't think it's working because of A, B and C', etc. I ghost when I've been given crappy behaviour and am not exclusive with the person. I don't think there's anything at all wrong with that. I'm way past the point of feeling obligated to treat everyone with indiscriminate respect. Respect is earned. Underlined -- nor do I.... as I said in my original response to you. If a man was crappy to me, I wouldn't contact him again either. But again that's not what I'm talking about. Edited March 4, 2016 by katiegrl
The Outlaw Posted March 5, 2016 Posted March 5, 2016 I can't ever really see ghosting as being acceptable unless the person is less than kind, rude, or disrespectful to you. I was on the receiving end of being ghosted by a girl I briefly dated in July 2014. Things were fantastic. Awesome. She seemed to be everything I had ever wanted but out of the blue, bam! Ghosted. I never got any explanation whatsoever despite the fact I called her out on it. I didn't hear from her for about at least six weeks when she managed to call me three times in two minutes by 'accident ' she said and didn't really have the first thing to say. That was the last I heard from her, but came to find out she's engaged and I have the misfortune of passing her on her way to work at least once a week. I don't mean to sound harsh, you don't owe anyone anything, but if you're not into someone, I find the truth is always better than a lie or stringing someone along.
tuxedo cat Posted March 10, 2016 Posted March 10, 2016 (edited) Anecdotally, based on the responses in this thread, this seems to be more of a male phenomenon. I think men *on average* have more trouble with confrontation and less consideration for people's feelings, or at least they can compartmentalize guilt more easily than women can. Not all guys or even most guys, just more guys. The stories I hear about women ghosting usually occur earlier on in the courtship. Despite their reputation for frankness, men are generally less direct than women when it comes to anything emotional and their words hold less weight than their actions. Women are more in touch with their feelings and have more interest in communicating them. I dated one girl briefly and found the experience a lot easier because we could discuss everything. There was no guessing about whether she was into me. I think men sometimes say women are unpredictable or hard to read because guys aren't as skilled at picking up social cues, but many men are legitimately vague and don't even understand their own actions. Edited March 10, 2016 by tuxedo cat
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