Do you ever have moments of appease where you feel better than the heartbreak

[loveandhearts]

I started off not that into him (right now it's hard to understand how as my love made me think he is the best) and then he became my world.

Right now though my heart is calm (somehow) and I just think he can live his life and I can live mine.

I'm just scared of the pain coming back, the memories of feeling so loved by him. Even saying that it begins to make me hurt inside.

 

But I feel strong at this moment. I will not see him today like he wants me to. He wants to do the typical best friend thing which this site has helped me understand why he wants to be such good friends with me. I'm basically a back up plan, and I will not have that. I'm better than that.

As hard as it is, I think I'm going to pretend this year and a half never happened. Is that healthy when it comes to healing?

 

Also, sadly, the thought of another guy trying to get to know me just pisses me off which shows how much I'm not over him. I want to meet someone new, the right guy. And even though I wish it could be tomorrow I'm pretty sure it can't be that soon. I need to heal and stop loving my ex so damn much. I care about the littlest scratch on him, I want to make him feel warm when he's at work, I want to see him smile at me. I can't believe it's over. While there were problems for a while, it being over is so sudden.

Wow I went from thinking I was getting the hang of this to crying and my heart hurting again.

I know the hope of him wanting me again will creep up when he contacts me later, how do I handle that? Should I make sure I don't talk to him on the phone? Even though I still love his voice? Yesterday I told him I wasn't sure about us hanging out so I feel like I can't completely ignore him as I know my answer now, I have to tell him we can't be friends now, right??? Or will he get the picture if I never respond?

[PegNosePete]

Yesterday I told him I wasn't sure about us hanging out so I feel like I can't completely ignore him as I know my answer now, I have to tell him we can't be friends now, right??? Or will he get the picture if I never respond?

Sometimes they "get the message" but it can take a while. If you have been talking to him regularly then he may think something is wrong, he may send messages repeatedly before getting the message, which will hold you back. I think it would be best to tell him:

 

"Sorry but I am in too much pain now to be friends with you. I will not be communicating with you any more. Please respect my feelings and do not communicate with me either. This will be my last message. Goodbye"

 

And then DO NOT RESPOND, whatever he writes back.