Mrin Posted March 1, 2016 Posted March 1, 2016 I've seen quite a bit of discussion around people's "number". You know, the number of people they've had sex with. That's an interesting conversation. But what I think is an even more interesting conversation is a person's true number. How many people have your truly been in love with? Romantically. No family or friends. Not relationships per se. But real sticky sweet romantic love. Since I asked, I'll go first: 5 2
RecentChange Posted March 1, 2016 Posted March 1, 2016 One I did tell my high school BF that I loved him, but that was before I found deep, enduring, passionate love. Now the number of people I have had sex with is a very different number 1
carhill Posted March 1, 2016 Posted March 1, 2016 Six in total. Nearly all occurred from age 20 through age 40, typical for male reproductive drive period. I like to use that song lyric from Willie Nelson 'you were always on my mind' as an indicator of the demarcation between romantic love and other loves. 1
Michelle ma Belle Posted March 1, 2016 Posted March 1, 2016 My number is two; my (ex) husband and my last partner of 3 years. 1
GorillaTheater Posted March 1, 2016 Posted March 1, 2016 Just one. And that one since the Carter administration. 6
LydiaLong Posted March 1, 2016 Posted March 1, 2016 That's a really interesting question, one I've thought about extensively over the past 5 years. I have told many men that I 'loved' them. When I look back on those times, I'm not sure what I meant by 'love.' It was probably something like, "I lust after you" or "I'm really happy and excited with you right now." But those relationships didn't last, and I certainly don't think of them now with memories of 'love.' I didn't meet my true love until later in life. The relationship that I have now as a mature woman is one that I never felt with anyone else. It's more than just lust. It's a true connection, an acceptance of his faults, a deep caring, admiration for his accomplishments, empathy with his pain, etc. I've never been happier. So when I think of how many men I've 'loved,' the answer is really only one. We tell people we love them, but what do we mean at the time? 4
No_Go Posted March 1, 2016 Posted March 1, 2016 The real sticky (super sticky) love - one. Never dated him. Two others (never dated them as well) in a very young age (under 20). Some form of love - the people that I have dated long-term (three). I've seen quite a bit of discussion around people's "number". You know, the number of people they've had sex with. That's an interesting conversation. But what I think is an even more interesting conversation is a person's true number. How many people have your truly been in love with? Romantically. No family or friends. Not relationships per se. But real sticky sweet romantic love. Since I asked, I'll go first: 5 1
CarrieT Posted March 1, 2016 Posted March 1, 2016 I'm 51. I've had somewhere around 300 sexual partners (give or take a dozen). I've been in love at least 12 times that I can recall. There may have been one or two more that I thought was love at the time but was really infatuation. 1
Toodaloo Posted March 1, 2016 Posted March 1, 2016 2 One I should have married when I had the chance but I was scared. Massive mistake that. He is the one that got away. He asked me several times... I was very young and freaked out. I hurt him badly. He will never speak to me again and I do not blame him. I would still do anything for that man. One broke me, mind, body and soul. Having said that I was in love with the man I thought he was not who he actually was... Not been in love since him. So knock it down to one again. I keep hoping though. There have been several others that I thought I loved but looking back it wasn't romantic love at all. Just a sort of infatuation or with many of them the deep strong love you have for a friend who is just a friend not a lover who is also your best friend. So just once for me. 6
MrDuck Posted March 1, 2016 Posted March 1, 2016 Hmmm, I guess two. My ex was the first girl I loved. At the time I had never loved anyone like that. She gave me my son for that i'll be eternally thankful and I guess a part of me will love her all my life in a way. The love I feel for my current gf feels much deeper, not just that "sickly sweet" excitable love, but genuinely my future with her: marriage, kids, a Labrador and the rest of my life ...but I guess im older, more settled, more awear of myself, so I guess love changes as you go through life, im capable of a much deeper love now that I wasn't at 17. I loved them both as best as I could at the time, so 2. 1
Shepp Posted March 1, 2016 Posted March 1, 2016 Its right there in my signature! It's always been her. Since I was 15. No one else has ever come even close. 2
Satu Posted March 1, 2016 Posted March 1, 2016 (edited) A clipping from my journal: "Falling in love seems much, but is little. The slow discipline of love seems little, but is much." People can fall in and out of love in an evening, and do As for my number: 1. Edited March 1, 2016 by Satu 2
basil67 Posted March 1, 2016 Posted March 1, 2016 Three. And a whole lot of crushes which I thought were love at the time but actually weren't. 1
Timshel Posted March 1, 2016 Posted March 1, 2016 Six in total. Nearly all occurred from age 20 through age 40, typical for male reproductive drive period. I like to use that song lyric from Willie Nelson 'you were always on my mind' as an indicator of the demarcation between romantic love and other loves. You sir, have pulled a trump with Willie. I won't fold but will stay with my It's less than the BG's and more than one. 1
ChickiePops Posted March 1, 2016 Posted March 1, 2016 Just one. And that one since the Carter administration. Why don't men like you exist anymore?? Two for me but the second was much, much stronger than the first. 2
Emilia Posted March 1, 2016 Posted March 1, 2016 Why don't men like you exist anymore?? t. One is enough 4
preraph Posted March 1, 2016 Posted March 1, 2016 I've loved three, but one wasn't really at all reciprocal as far as love goes, but he never really hurt me either, to his credit. I came to believe we'd been engaged in a past life after having some visions in the first years I knew him. And I always had a sixth sense about him. The others loved me, but one had ED and some childhood issues and he couldn't be my man, but we remained close for some years. The other wanted kids and now has them and we had a lot of ups and downs because we worked together after the dating for a number of years. Lots of turmoil. But one thing that never changed is although love sometimes turned to hate, what it didn't do is fade away entirely, and I am going with him and his wife to a concert next month. I last slept with him in 1979, with a couple of close calls in the 80s and estrangement in the 90s. I'm really okay with being friends now. He's a good music buddy, and my other great music buddy died, so I need him. Love isn't always sweet and sticky or simple. At least not for me.
loverboy69 Posted March 1, 2016 Posted March 1, 2016 Been truly in love with three. While single I was very sexually active and I don't want to post the amount of sex partners I've had. I've also dated many people who I felt a little chemistry with but never love. My first love was very intense. It took me almost 2 years to get over him. Second love started out very physical then I fell head over heels. Ended badly. The third is who I'm with now. He wasn't even my type when I met him. The chemistry is intense. I love him including all his faults. 1
Timshel Posted March 1, 2016 Posted March 1, 2016 Five for me. Between 18 and 43. One is good...real love is always enough. 2
ShatteredLady Posted March 1, 2016 Posted March 1, 2016 2. The first was my love through my formative years. He was an acoustic guitar playing, bleeding heart poet. His 'depression' was always that he'd loose me. I always thought that he was waiting for that to happen so he could go back to being a 'bad boy' with a good excuse for it "She broke my heart!". Strange thing is, I've recently reconnected with a (female) childhood friend who still speaks to him on occasion. He's never married, no kids & claims me as the only love of his life, 25 years later! He's a 'kept man' by a much older lady at the moment. I haven't contacted him & don't intend to. The second is my H of nearly 20 years & father of my children. It's a different kind of love. He's hurt me more than I thought anyone ever could. Life's confusing & very painful at times. I still don't feel like a 'grown-up' in many ways. I'm shocked when I say I'm 46 now!! I've been with other men when I was young but never felt love.
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