Lola2609 Posted February 26, 2016 Posted February 26, 2016 So I met this guy on vacation few months ago. We have been in touch since than and finally I decided to visit him. I am staying here for 3 days but something happened. Let me say that he was a great host, he showed me around, he hinted that i should come back again, he should visit me. We kissed (a lot), we slept in the same bed. The problem is sex never happened. The first night I was drunk so I understand why. Last night, however, he asked me what do i want. I thought it was obvious (I was lying naked on top of him). He said he wouldnt make me do anything i dont want to. We kept making out but that is it. It really bothers me that he could not have sex. What do you think ?
PegNosePete Posted February 26, 2016 Posted February 26, 2016 I think he meant "what do you want" in a more general sense, as in, what are you looking for relationship-wise. Just a ONS / holiday fling, or an actual relationship? Often guys feel they are in a no-win situation. If they go for sex, they are pigs who are only interested in sex. If they don't... well, this thread. 2
TheArtist Posted February 26, 2016 Posted February 26, 2016 You were lying on top of the guy, why didn't you say, 'I'll show you what I want right this minute...', and then get all squelchy? I tend not to take the initiative on this stuff either, because, as Pete says, men get labeled very quickly on that kind of thing. 1
SSJROMANCE Posted February 26, 2016 Posted February 26, 2016 Did you ask him when he turned gay? On a serious note if you wanted to have sex why didn't you take things into your own hands - literally? Did you grab his cock and stroke it until he had a massive pulsating dripping wet hard on? Did you go down on him and give him a blow job? I am quite sure if you did any of those two things he would have been banging you shortly thereafter. I'm confused. 1
smudge21 Posted February 26, 2016 Posted February 26, 2016 Agree with all this as have been there (well, she wasn't naked on top of me but was initiating all the moves back to the hotel room). It's a minefield of not knowing. I know that sounds odd to the OP, but we men do get odd responses at times. Maybe he simply liked the idea of the woman taking charge, sometimes we do, it's a major turn on. Plus even though you were naked, he still may have had the smallest doubt, and that's often enough. There's a Reg Hunter stand up routine that goes something like this: I'm a party with some friends back years ago. We're young, excited, thinking that maybe we can hook up with some girls and who knows, might even get a kiss. Anyway later on this girl comes over to me, we dance, she's grinding, things are heating up. Then she drags me into a small room and things really get going. Clothes are coming off, hands are everywhere. Then suddenly she pushes back and says "I can't do this" - "what does that mean?" "I mean I can't do this, I don't know you that well"... now at the time she said this, I had two fingers in her pussy! Where's the line? What would she have said if I only had one finger in, "now come on, you know me better than that!"... 1
Author Lola2609 Posted February 26, 2016 Author Posted February 26, 2016 OP, your point being ? My point is why he didnt want to have sex with me if otherwise, he acts like he likes me.
Author Lola2609 Posted February 26, 2016 Author Posted February 26, 2016 Here is the update: i asked me what is the reason. He told me that he is very nervous. He actually tried after I asked him but no luck. Wtf is going on? 1. He doesnt like me or 2. He is really nervous
Lobouspo Posted February 26, 2016 Posted February 26, 2016 OP, did you guys have sex when you met him on vacation? If so, how was it?
spiderowl Posted February 27, 2016 Posted February 27, 2016 Here is the update: i asked me what is the reason. He told me that he is very nervous. He actually tried after I asked him but no luck. Wtf is going on? 1. He doesnt like me or 2. He is really nervous Could be either. Give him chance to get to know you as a person. Some guys do need to feel a bond and don't want to just have sex with a stranger.
Author Lola2609 Posted February 27, 2016 Author Posted February 27, 2016 OP, did you guys have sex when you met him on vacation? If so, how was it? No, we did not. We spent only one night together and that was a party and then a pool. Since then we have been in touch and finally met just now.
Mr. Lucky Posted February 27, 2016 Posted February 27, 2016 We spent only one night together and that was a party and then a pool. I'll admit up front I'm old school, but why not let the relationship develop a little more organically? Spend some time together, get to know each other and enjoy each others company. When a comfort level exists and you've established you like each other, the sex usually flows pretty freely. Based on your description, he's feeling rushed... Mr. Lucky 1
joseb Posted February 27, 2016 Posted February 27, 2016 Here is the update: i asked me what is the reason. He told me that he is very nervous. He actually tried after I asked him but no luck. Wtf is going on? This is pretty relevant information! Your original post did not suggest this. When you say he tried, do you mean he couldnt get an erection/couldnt put in in, what?
Author Lola2609 Posted February 27, 2016 Author Posted February 27, 2016 This is pretty relevant information! Your original post did not suggest this. When you say he tried, do you mean he couldnt get an erection/couldnt put in in, what? Well, after I posted my question I talked to him and asked straightforward what is going on. He explained that he is nervous and also doesnt like to rush things but he likes me. An hour later he tried but yes, he couldn't get an erection. He said it is 100% him and that I am too sexy and make him nervous (rolling my eyes here). I can't help but feel he is just not attracted to me.
preraph Posted February 27, 2016 Posted February 27, 2016 Nervous might equal erectile dysfunction for him. Or he may be just inexperienced and virginal and doesn't know what to do. He did ask. He shouldn't have had to, granted. 2
BetrayedH Posted February 29, 2016 Posted February 29, 2016 Performance anxiety that makes it difficult to get an erection, which leads to more anxiety, which makes it more difficult to get an erection... See where I'm going with this? Or he already knows he has difficulty getting erections and has no idea what to do about it (which makes him anxious and precludes it from happening). I doubt it's you, at all.
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