kztar Posted March 7, 2016 Posted March 7, 2016 1)Forced me to dump you yet im the actual dumpee here not the dumper. 2)Had the dirtiest room on earth, nails on floor, dust everywhere, clean and dirty clothes all together in the floor. Lived at home and didn't even lift a figer to throw out garbage or anything 3)No sense of style. Got some after got with me 4)Obsessed with video games, gym and steroids 5)Mama's boy that did nothing without his mother's approval 7)serious insecurities issues always asking if I would leave him for a black guy. I should have. 8)Always complained I needed a hobby but failed to understand that ALL MY HOBBIES were back home and not in his hometown where I only spent weekends 9)Ate too much and was ALWAYS wanting me to cook, which also led to me gaining weight 10)Felt some type of way because I got a job where I made more money than him 11)Made me feel the worst i've ever felt in bed making me feel ugly rather than sexy in bed. First time in a lifetime SMH. 12)Claimed that he TRIED to love me but keep tally of all my wrongs and never discussed a word with me 13)Avoided any type of conflict, even if it meant not voicing his concerns. 14)Hates any type of responsibility This list is much longer but ill leave it there for now!
Satu Posted March 7, 2016 Posted March 7, 2016 "Because you were frequently rude to people you didn't know for no good reason, and it embarrassed and saddened me."
SixxChick Posted March 8, 2016 Posted March 8, 2016 Polar965 ... did we date the same guy? LOL! Because we are very similarly situated. I did a pro/con list several months ago. The pro list was one page. The con list was five pages, single spaced. Hang in there! 1
Damaged217 Posted March 9, 2016 Posted March 9, 2016 Oh I HAVE to get in on this! 1. I also am so relieved that I don't have to cook his a$$ dinner anymore! 2. He never told me I was beautiful 3. He was a dirty pig and I felt like his mom yelling at him to pick his dirty clothes off the floor 4. He never planned any dates for me 5. He was sexting women instead of communicating with me about his self-esteem issues or any issues for that matter 6. Was an immature prick who never appreciated me 7. Kissed a woman AFTER I forgave him and gave him another chance after the sexting (and never confessed and then lied multiple times when I discovered it) 8. Was too sensitive and got mad over the dumbest things 9. Acted like an old grumpy grandpa That felt good!
SixxChick Posted March 9, 2016 Posted March 9, 2016 I think a brilliant strategy for moving on is to read your list, and then imagine you'd never met your ex, but was shown your list instead. Would you still want to meet them? Would you go on a blind date with that person? I think this is actually very brilliant. But it made me wonder. What would his list look like? I'll never know because lack of communication (not on my part) was one of our biggest downfalls. If you can't sit down at the table and sort it out like adults, what have you got?
kztar Posted March 9, 2016 Posted March 9, 2016 I love these lists. I think a brilliant strategy for moving on is to read your list, and then imagine you'd never met your ex, but was shown your list instead. Would you still want to meet them? Would you go on a blind date with that person? I wouldn't even give it the benefit of the doubt. I would take an immediate PASS. No way. If i could go back in time I wouldn't have dated him at all.
Redhead14 Posted March 9, 2016 Posted March 9, 2016 I am a couple weeks out with NC after ending relationship with boyfriend. For whatever reason, I am not feeling strong. I'm questioning my reasoning, I'm feeling lonely, I'm having nostalgia. The thing is; I've been down this road before and I know that exBF and I were on an endless circle of make up/break up and were just not compatible, despite underlying feelings of love. I have made a list (harsh sounding, I know) of my pet peeves and larger reasons I broke it off. I'm trying to strengthen my resolve by reminding myself WHY I am doing this. Please feel free to join me if it is helpful to you to keep NC. 1) I am relieved to not cook him dinner all of the time. 2) I was sick of his need for attention from other women. 3) His holy attitude was tiresome. 4) He was unreliable with plans. 5) He never went to the doctor or dentist. 6) He did this weird thing where he always had to be clever with rhyming words and word play. 7) Everyone in the world needed a therapist but him. 8) He never gave gifts, brought flowers did traditional acts of generosity while a couple. 9) He had a very low libido. 10) He was shifty with money. AHHHHHH. I feel better. Now I remember. 1. I am a strong woman 2. I was sick of needing attention from HIM 3. I am the woman I was before he came along 4. I have the attitude that is needed to be a strong woman 5. I have a life and a schedule of my own 6. I say what I mean and mean what I say 7. I don't need a therapist 8. I am a generous person and emotionally available 9. I am a sensual/sexual woman 10 I am a strong woman
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