michwinter15 Posted February 21, 2016 Share Posted February 21, 2016 (edited) I've been thinking about some of the regrets I have regarding my life, and the biggest one that keeps coming up is not asking out a former co-worker. She and I worked together for about 3 years in different departments (both single the entire time), but didn't really know about one another until about 4-5 months ago, right before I left the company. At that time, I was really shy, and a habitual choke artist, so I never took our conversations as far as I really wanted, afraid I might accidentally ruin an opportunity I wasn't ready for. Unfortunately, right when I was feeling comfortable around her, I got an offer for a better job elsewhere. The only thing I managed to do before I left was to connect with her on LinkedIn. I got busy at my new job, and just couldn't bring myself to follow-up with her, justifying myself with various excuses. Over these past few months, I've realized I might have made a big mistake, and am unsure of what to do. Do you guys/gals think it would be reasonable to ask her out through LinkedIn, or would it be too creepy? Is there something else might have missed, or should I chalk it up as a loss? EDIT: Now, there's a bit more I should mention first. She and I have very similar personalities, as we're both quiet and rather introverted. The reasons I only connected with her on LinkedIn are: 1) I choked asking for her number; 2) Neither one of us used Facebook, Twitter, etc. I can't think of any other options that aren't super stalker-like. Edited February 21, 2016 by michwinter15 Missing infomation. Link to post Share on other sites
candie13 Posted February 21, 2016 Share Posted February 21, 2016 I've been thinking about some of the regrets I have regarding my life, and the biggest one that keeps coming up is not asking out a former co-worker. She and I worked together for about 3 years in different departments (both single the entire time), but didn't really know about one another until about 4-5 months ago, right before I left the company. At that time, I was really shy, and a habitual choke artist, so I never took our conversations as far as I really wanted, afraid I might accidentally ruin an opportunity I wasn't ready for. Unfortunately, right when I was feeling comfortable around her, I got an offer for a better job elsewhere. The only thing I managed to do before I left was to connect with her on LinkedIn. I got busy at my new job, and just couldn't bring myself to follow-up with her, justifying myself with various excuses. Over these past few months, I've realized I might have made a big mistake, and am unsure of what to do. Do you guys/gals think it would be reasonable to ask her out through LinkedIn, or would it be too creepy? Is there something else might have missed, or should I chalk it up as a loss? EDIT: Now, there's a bit more I should mention first. She and I have very similar personalities, as we're both quiet and rather introverted. The reasons I only connected with her on LinkedIn are: 1) I choked asking for her number; 2) Neither one of us used Facebook, Twitter, etc. I can't think of any other options that aren't super stalker-like. creepy. If You don't have a fb account you should make one yesterday. Organize drinks with former colleagues & make sure she finds out. Follow her on instagram. Linked in is Really creepy. Link to post Share on other sites
266696687 Posted February 21, 2016 Share Posted February 21, 2016 I've been thinking about some of the regrets I have regarding my life, and the biggest one that keeps coming up is not asking out a former co-worker. She and I worked together for about 3 years in different departments (both single the entire time), but didn't really know about one another until about 4-5 months ago, right before I left the company. At that time, I was really shy, and a habitual choke artist, so I never took our conversations as far as I really wanted, afraid I might accidentally ruin an opportunity I wasn't ready for. Unfortunately, right when I was feeling comfortable around her, I got an offer for a better job elsewhere. The only thing I managed to do before I left was to connect with her on LinkedIn. I got busy at my new job, and just couldn't bring myself to follow-up with her, justifying myself with various excuses. Over these past few months, I've realized I might have made a big mistake, and am unsure of what to do. Do you guys/gals think it would be reasonable to ask her out through LinkedIn, or would it be too creepy? Is there something else might have missed, or should I chalk it up as a loss? EDIT: Now, there's a bit more I should mention first. She and I have very similar personalities, as we're both quiet and rather introverted. The reasons I only connected with her on LinkedIn are: 1) I choked asking for her number; 2) Neither one of us used Facebook, Twitter, etc. I can't think of any other options that aren't super stalker-like. LinkedIn is a professional network so instead of asking her out over it why not just drop her a friendly note to say hello. Give her your phone number and tell her you'd love to catch up with her for a coffee or something. Offer her a time / day. If she agrees you can ask her on a date in person. You haven't seen her in a while so instead of directly asking her for a date a casual coffee is much more welcoming. You can start from there. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
candie13 Posted February 21, 2016 Share Posted February 21, 2016 Email. Do That on her private e-mail. Focus on getting her emsil. Less professional, more friendly. Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted February 21, 2016 Share Posted February 21, 2016 Using LinkedIn would be creepy. It's just so not done that way. Lots of scammers use it for romance scamming, in case you didn't know. There have been posts here from women who were completely put off by being contacted on LinkedIn. If you have other means to get in touch with her, use them. Link to post Share on other sites
ScienceGal Posted February 21, 2016 Share Posted February 21, 2016 Don't do it directly through LinkedIn. Link to post Share on other sites
bu2002 Posted February 21, 2016 Share Posted February 21, 2016 Since you guys worked at the same company, and she's still there, wouldn't you know her work email? You would've had a similar email since you worked there and know what format it uses. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted February 21, 2016 Share Posted February 21, 2016 Obviously, you know where she works, so why not just call up there and ask for her. If you had been social there, having lunch with some people, call and invite all of them to lunch and include her. Link to post Share on other sites
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