MidwestUSA Posted February 21, 2016 Posted February 21, 2016 wow!!! that's awesome. thanks for sharing! You're quite welcome!
truth_seeker Posted February 21, 2016 Posted February 21, 2016 I've told it a lot, but okay, for you. I noticed this guy and I ended up commenting on a lot of the same posts, mostly music related. I didn't know him, or recognize his last name as anyone I knew (pretty common last name). But we shared a lot of common friends. So, after a particularly intense discussion about Rodger Hodgson (Supertramp), and his underratedness, for one particular song (the name of which escapes me now, but I have it on vinyl, I'm not dating myself, am I?), I friended him. We Facebook chatted for a bit over two months, met face to face in May, but at an event where we didn't really connect due to the number of people there. We spent a month talking on the phone (about 120 hours, I printed out the itemized phone bill, and it's in our scrapbook) before going on a date on June 2. He dropped the ILY on June 28th, moved in with me on July 25th, proposed on Valentine's Day, married on Cinco de Mayo 2013. Short version, and no, I was not pregnant! Nice story. This was fate at work. Together 6-7 months, engaged, married... to me, the way it should be... not date for 3-5-7-10 years and never commit - those relationships are filled with deceit, betrayal and unfilled promises. 1
loveflower Posted February 21, 2016 Posted February 21, 2016 I've told it a lot, but okay, for you. I noticed this guy and I ended up commenting on a lot of the same posts, mostly music related. I didn't know him, or recognize his last name as anyone I knew (pretty common last name). But we shared a lot of common friends. So, after a particularly intense discussion about Rodger Hodgson (Supertramp), and his underratedness, for one particular song (the name of which escapes me now, but I have it on vinyl, I'm not dating myself, am I?), I friended him. We Facebook chatted for a bit over two months, met face to face in May, but at an event where we didn't really connect due to the number of people there. We spent a month talking on the phone (about 120 hours, I printed out the itemized phone bill, and it's in our scrapbook) before going on a date on June 2. He dropped the ILY on June 28th, moved in with me on July 25th, proposed on Valentine's Day, married on Cinco de Mayo 2013. Short version, and no, I was not pregnant! Very romantic and magical! 4
Author ScienceGal Posted February 21, 2016 Author Posted February 21, 2016 The message I sent did not go through. This is like a similar situation I had recently where someone couldn't receive a message until we were friends. So, he'll just get the request and not the message (I'm pretty sure). I'll keep you all updated! 3
Author ScienceGal Posted February 21, 2016 Author Posted February 21, 2016 He accepted the request. Resend the message or no?
truth_seeker Posted February 21, 2016 Posted February 21, 2016 He accepted the request. Resend the message or no? Yes. Resend. 1
truth_seeker Posted February 21, 2016 Posted February 21, 2016 I'm very happy for you, ScienceGal. We need more good stories, less negative ones. 3
Author ScienceGal Posted February 21, 2016 Author Posted February 21, 2016 (edited) Well, let me just say that this doesn't mean anything yet. I had a similar thread recently where I posted about another guy accepting my friend request as well, but things never went anywhere. We chatted back-and-forth for a while, but could never really connect. And in seeing his posts, I'm OK with that. He is not in a place to be dating right now. I think it's good to reach out and take a chance though. You never know! Edited February 21, 2016 by ScienceGal 4
truth_seeker Posted February 21, 2016 Posted February 21, 2016 No, it doesn't guarantee that romance will blossom but you took a chance and it might pay off. I hope it does for you. 2
Author ScienceGal Posted February 21, 2016 Author Posted February 21, 2016 Thanks I resent the message, but it still just shows "sent" as opposed to delivered or read. I'm not sure why. I'm happy he accepted anyway. Ideally, it'll spark more conversation at the gym. And, he can learn a little about me through my profile. 1
truth_seeker Posted February 21, 2016 Posted February 21, 2016 Thanks I resent the message, but it still just shows "sent" as opposed to delivered or read. I'm not sure why. I'm happy he accepted anyway. Ideally, it'll spark more conversation at the gym. And, he can learn a little about me through my profile. It means it was sent and not yet read. When he opens it, it will say read.
Author ScienceGal Posted February 21, 2016 Author Posted February 21, 2016 I thought it usually says "delivered" once it reaches the inbox?
jesslindy Posted February 21, 2016 Posted February 21, 2016 You could start a realtionship the old fashioned way and just talk to the guy to his face. Man the world is a changing. If I had a facebook, wouldn't be caught dead, and someone messaged me on there in a flirtatious way, I would laugh. Talk to his face.
truth_seeker Posted February 21, 2016 Posted February 21, 2016 I thought it usually says "delivered" once it reaches the inbox? I know with text messaging on the phone it says delivered. On FB messenger it was SENT then READ. That what I remember.
Author ScienceGal Posted February 21, 2016 Author Posted February 21, 2016 You could start a realtionship the old fashioned way and just talk to the guy to his face. Man the world is a changing. If I had a facebook, wouldn't be caught dead, and someone messaged me on there in a flirtatious way, I would laugh. Talk to his face. I agree with you. If I saw him all the time I would talk to him more. Problem is, until this morning I hadn't seen him since September. I figure this is the only way to get the ball rolling… And I didn't message anything flirtatious. 1
HansonGirl Posted February 21, 2016 Posted February 21, 2016 I agree with you. If I saw him all the time I would talk to him more. Problem is, until this morning I hadn't seen him since September. I figure this is the only way to get the ball rolling… And I didn't message anything flirtatious. what did you say if you don't mind my asking? or what was the gist of it? I am asking because i wouldn't know what to say! you are so brave!
Author ScienceGal Posted February 21, 2016 Author Posted February 21, 2016 what did you say if you don't mind my asking? or what was the gist of it? I am asking because i wouldn't know what to say! you are so brave! "Hey! You came up as someone I might know, which I thought was interesting since I don't see you very often and we don't really have any mutual friends"
Author ScienceGal Posted February 21, 2016 Author Posted February 21, 2016 HansonGirl, I obviously don't know what to say either! I was aiming for a neutral opener, so hopefully I achieved that.
Chris2016 Posted February 21, 2016 Posted February 21, 2016 Good for taking the risk ScienceGal! Life is short. And in the grand scheme of things, it's nothing. I'm tempted to too, with meetups, but so chicken. But you got me motivated. 1
loveflower Posted February 21, 2016 Posted February 21, 2016 Just poll a bunch of women and most will say they would be creeped out if a guy they really didn't know, maybe seen them before at the gym, work, wherever, would creep them out. so guys won't get creep out? what if a woman request but the guy decline, wouldn't that be harder for a woman?
Author ScienceGal Posted February 21, 2016 Author Posted February 21, 2016 so guys won't get creep out? what if a woman request but the guy decline, wouldn't that be harder for a woman? I'm sure some guys get creeped out. Depends on the person and situation. If he didn't accept my request, I'd be a little bummed, but that's it. It wouldn't really bother me since I have no investment at this point. I'd then know to take any further interaction at the gym as purely friendly. 1
truth_seeker Posted February 21, 2016 Posted February 21, 2016 so guys won't get creep out? Guys are more dismissive. If the girl isn't hot to to them, they'll just be like "eh, not interested, delete" but women sometimes make a bigger deal out of it. They can be dramatic about it. "OMG! I can't believe this creep found me on FB and friend requested me!!!" what if a woman request but the guy decline, wouldn't that be harder for a woman? Maybe. I think when anyone gets rejected it stings... depends how sensitive they are... some take it harder than others.
MidwestUSA Posted February 21, 2016 Posted February 21, 2016 You could start a realtionship the old fashioned way and just talk to the guy to his face. Man the world is a changing. If I had a facebook, wouldn't be caught dead, and someone messaged me on there in a flirtatious way, I would laugh. Talk to his face. Well, thank goodness my H didn't laugh at me! Altho I wasn't flirtatious. Best of luck, OP! 1
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