AdamantyumKrystal Posted February 19, 2016 Posted February 19, 2016 (edited) I'm not sure yet with what i'm dealing here or what i'm even going thru right now,sorry in advance for my sloppy english . So i'm talking on FB with this girl for like 5 or 6 months,in the first months we talked a few times a week and my guess is she seemed pretty interested , she was contacting me first lots of times,send me selfies and lots of kisses and little hints of "flirt". We never met face to face, one of my bestfriends showed her to me,and she seemed a decent girl to him and i guess i wanted to see if it would work till we would meet. She is in France now at her aunt looking for a job and she is coming back to the "home-country" this summer;So...as i said she seemed pretty interested in the first months,but lately (last month) she started acting distant and barely reaching out to me and i had to start mostly all the contact, at first i thought she is playing hard to get but last evening my bestfriend which is in a relationship with one of her bestfriends and has access to his gf's FB account,sent me a printscreen that basically sadened me and made me rethink all of my thoughts about her. So there was this guy which she was hanging around when she was back here,that kind of guy who lies,deceits and tells girls whole loads of crap to get in their panties,that is what my bestfriend told me about him,and i believe his judgement. Well,he was annoying her and making rude sexual remarks so she blocked him a few times, one time she even told me, but she unblocked him after some time and started falling for his bullsh*t again,which i warned her before ofc but as most 21 yr old girls are,she didn't listen -_- Well,last night this good friend of mine was logged on his gf's account and he happened to witness what his gf was talking with the "abroad girl"i shall call her BLondie,so blondie told his gf something like " he conquered her with words,and he's good at words" and that she let him put a private engagement status visible only to them and her familiy-close friends on facebook so he would feel better if noone saw,as my buddy's gf is is listed as one of her sisters on FB ,she could saw the private info on blondie's profile. I didn't believe at first what he was saying and thought that he was joking,but after he sent me a printscreen which showed she was really engaged to him i was just shocked ! all these months i tried to get along with her get to know her and which basically would lead to meeting her in person when she comes back here seem IN VAIN :"( My good friend didn't knew what to say either,he was the one to introduce us and told me things about her , i can't say he was sad like me but he wasn't quiet pleased either. Basically now, my questions are : -SHould i keep pursuing this girl?? Do i still have a chance with her? -It's just a hidden info which only family would see,could this be some kind of joke and im worrying too much or the sh*t is getting real? I remember when we talked some months ago and she told me that she can't wait to meet me and get to know me,some cute stuff, but now... i don't know what to say , i feel hurt... i don't know how i can get attached so easily to someone without even knowing them in real life .. As far as i know she never had a real boyfriend ,she is a virgin ,she didn't go to parties and she always was the "good"-girl which listens to her parents, so she didn't really got to know the "real world" and the panties-predators that are in it , as he is one of em players and manipulating liar , it seems she is an easy prey for him -_- I have no idea what he said to her that she fell so hard for him or didn't , but one thing she doesn't know and i do, is that most of his words are lies,my friend was room-mate with this guy for some time when he was in college so he knows the guy is fake as heck.At this point i'm not quite sure what should i do next , or if NEXT should even be an option anymore.. it's so annoying that i didn't met her irl , it would have been so much easier then, but now after these news i don't know if i even want to meet her anymore, i honestly hoped she is a smarter girl than to fall for a player's facade and i'm kinda dissapointed. My friend told me that if i really want to be with her than i should keep pursuing her and somehow show her what that guy really is and how he is playing her, easier said THAN done,coz if i say something bad about him she will think i'm falsely accuse him and as she is almost caught in his net already, he could easily portray me as the malovelont-guy . I've been thru alot this last year and experienced some traumatizing heartbreak which lead to depression and other not so good personality changes & trust issues, and after i started talking to her i felt that perhaps and only Maybe there is still some lovely girl left for me out there , she and i have some pretty common interests, music taste, even some hobbies , families etc. But now after all this "honeymoon phase" i feel like everything i tried to built is crashing down in a hurry, somehow in the end after my first and last relationship i finally learnt to detach myself emotionally when someone is not into me, but i feel that maybe if i fight for her i have a chance to take her back and "save" her from future heartbreak and other "not so good" events, or i could just let her go and and she will hit her head HARD against the wall,lose her "most precious gift" to a pig,end up in a mess,get heartbroken and finally regretting that she was so stupid to fall for his lies.. I somehow care about her and really want to be with her but if she is really that easily to fool then ... i don't know if i should keep invest my time in her and try harder or not, i would also feel like a coward if i let her go without an attempt to win her . So PLEASE, i'm asking u to give me some advice and give me some hints on what should i try to do next, i have almost 2 years of membership here and browsed loveshack weekly &read many many posts and stories ,gave some advices and learnt alot about relationships,but right now i'm super-duper emotional and i really need the view of someone from the outside on this topic.. I'm very emotional right now and haven't felt like this in a long time, i'm trying not to overly-dramatize everything and i am able to walk away if i want to but i really don't know what to do.. coz at the end of the day i know there's other fish in the sea, and i also learnt that it's better to be alone than with the wrong person! sorry for the long post .. Edited February 19, 2016 by AdamantyumKrystal
AverageJoe1986 Posted February 19, 2016 Posted February 19, 2016 Worth reading for the phrase 'panties-predator'. You should move on and forget about her. If she comes back to the home country and initiates contact with you then maybe talk to her but I would just move on. 1
Author AdamantyumKrystal Posted February 19, 2016 Author Posted February 19, 2016 Worth reading for the phrase 'panties-predator'. yeah .. sometimes i make myself laugh alone :v , i will wait until the next time she contacts me , meanwhile i will prepare my moves
todreaminblue Posted February 19, 2016 Posted February 19, 2016 i dont think you should pursue her at all...she made a choice and she also chose not to inform you of that choice....so a bit dishonest ...not a good sign for longevity.....move on and find someone who chooses you and you alone....get to know that lady a little better than just facebook ...good luck...deb
Recommended Posts