weeble78 Posted February 18, 2016 Posted February 18, 2016 Hi there Backstory: married 2.5 years, 1 year old daughter, husband has had emotional affair (that I know of) and is leaving us. He has asked for 3 overnights a week, which I feel is a little too much for a baby so young (who has problems sleeping in places other than home including nursery). I can't explain to her or ask her if she is happy doing it, yet obviously as her father he has the right to be with her too and won't want to give up his time with her. How to solve something like this and what do other people think? I grew up in a happy family and just cannot imagine for the life of me what it would be like growing up between two separate houses, having two of everything and never being able to settle long before packing again. What is best for baby?
Mr. Lucky Posted February 18, 2016 Posted February 18, 2016 Hi there Backstory: married 2.5 years, 1 year old daughter, husband has had emotional affair (that I know of) and is leaving us. He has asked for 3 overnights a week, which I feel is a little too much for a baby so young (who has problems sleeping in places other than home including nursery). I can't explain to her or ask her if she is happy doing it, yet obviously as her father he has the right to be with her too and won't want to give up his time with her. How to solve something like this and what do other people think? I grew up in a happy family and just cannot imagine for the life of me what it would be like growing up between two separate houses, having two of everything and never being able to settle long before packing again. What is best for baby? Not being obstructionist, but if your theory of "one home" is true, why not his ??? And you can see your child one night per week? Kids adapt, it's the adults that struggle ... Mr. Lucky
amomwhoknows Posted February 19, 2016 Posted February 19, 2016 I think that you are right. It is too much for a 1 year old. Have you consulted an attorney? Mr. Lucky, her husband made the decision to cheat and leave the family. Actions consequences. Anyway, in many US states, even standard custody plans don't doesn't apply before the age or two or three. There is something called a step up plan, which starts off very slowly and works up. Do you know what is the norm for the courts in your area?
Tayla Posted February 19, 2016 Posted February 19, 2016 contingent on who gets primary custody, the judge will decide . Its imparative that as the parents , that your love for this child supercede the adult issues of past follies. You are both equals in accountability for the welfare of this child. If He is able to attend to mutual schedule dates/times... allow such. You both have 18 years to work towards a healthy child... start now to build that bridge.
Mr. Lucky Posted February 19, 2016 Posted February 19, 2016 Mr. Lucky, her husband made the decision to cheat and leave the family. Actions consequences. People divorce their spouses, not their children. Even if he deserves his scarlet letter, has nothing to do with custody... Mr. Lucky
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