Daking123 Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 Started dating this girl a month ago. She ended a 3 year relationship then 2 weeks later we start dating. She is already say we're soul mates. She's always emotional. Sex is what we do a lot of. She's always posting pictures of us together. I don't know if she's truly that happy or just in a phase 1
katiegrl Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 (edited) Started dating this girl a month ago. She ended a 3 year relationship then 2 weeks later we start dating. She is already say we're soul mates. She's always emotional. Sex is what we do a lot of. She's always posting pictures of us together. I don't know if she's truly that happy or just in a phase How do YOU feel about her? Or does that not matter....as long as she's into you, you're in? It's impossible to say what she is feeling. What's your connection like? Edited February 8, 2016 by katiegrl 1
LostOnes05 Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 Do you play basketball?? Because it sounds like a rebound to me. I could be wrong though...but 2 weeks in, nah. 2
d0nnivain Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 She's caught up in a romantic fantasy world. She can't be alone. This isn't about you. It's about her not being alone. Tread carefully. 2
mike_89 Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 Lust or love or, my guess, manipulation. She needs someone to fill the void her breakup left her and you are the chosen one. 1
SSJROMANCE Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 She JUST ended a 3 year relationship 2 weeks ago and now you guys have already done "lots of sex" and she believes you are her soul mate within that two week timeframe. Oh my - she sounds unstable to me. Just as quickly she sucked you up I would be worried how quickly she can spit you out. Careful. 5
Satu Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 Started dating this girl a month ago. She ended a 3 year relationship then 2 weeks later we start dating. *She is already say we're soul mates. She's always emotional. Sex is what we do a lot of. She's always posting pictures of us together. I don't know if she's truly that happy or just in a phase *Underneath that lies an ocean of desperation. Enjoy it while you can, because it won't last. 1
lilmissjava Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 You're going to get hurt when the band aid gets ripped off from her previous relationship. 2
Redhead14 Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 Started dating this girl a month ago. She ended a 3 year relationship then 2 weeks later we start dating. She is already say we're soul mates. She's always emotional. Sex is what we do a lot of. She's always posting pictures of us together. I don't know if she's truly that happy or just in a phase A man or a woman who just ended a long-term relationship two weeks ago is in no way emotionally prepared to get into another one. When they do it so quickly, it's simply because they are vulnerable, needing validation and seeking comfort in the arms of someone else which is really just a temporary fix, an attempt to replace the other person. She's always emotional -- Of course she is. She's grieving a loss. Sex is what we do a lot of -- sure, its a good distraction from the pain. She is in a phase that may last a while, and then the reality will hit her again and you will be hurt. Either she will go back to the ex or simply drop you and tell you she's not ready for a relationship or "doesn't know what she wants". If she says she doesn't know what she wants -- she knows what she wants -- she wants her ex and not you. If I were you, I would stop seeing her if you are hoping for a relationship for yourself with someone. Do it gently and respectfully but do it soon. 1
deckard11 Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 Started dating this girl a month ago. She ended a 3 year relationship then 2 weeks later we start dating. She is already say we're soul mates. She's always emotional. Sex is what we do a lot of. She's always posting pictures of us together. I don't know if she's truly that happy or just in a phase Run away dude, run! 3
WomenWubber Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 When someone use that word on me I always disregard the "soul" part of it and just focus on having a good time. Just dissappear when things go south with her. 1
Popsicle Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 Started dating this girl a month ago. She ended a 3 year relationship then 2 weeks later we start dating. She is already say we're soul mates. She's always emotional. Sex is what we do a lot of. She's always posting pictures of us together. I don't know if she's truly that happy or just in a phase She's happy. Its sad that people are so negative here. 1
OnlyHonesty Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 She's happy. Its sad that people are so negative here. People are not being negative, they are being realistic. The woman has barely got out of her previous relationship and has already proclaimed another man is her soulmate. This is all fantasy and she doesn't even know him! 2
Popsicle Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 People are not being negative, they are being realistic. The woman has barely got out of her previous relationship and has already proclaimed another man is her soulmate. This is all fantasy and she doesn't even know him! Maybe he is her soulmate. You don't know that he isn't. 1
WhirlwindGuy Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 She's happy. Its sad that people are so negative here. This. I have noticed people on this site always ALWAYS attribute some negative undertone to everything that happens in a relationship. Sure, maybe she is wrapped up in "that feeling" but maybe she really means it? Maybe she hated her ex and is thrilled to be with someone she actually connects with? Maybe she is an alien from mars? Maybe she is a dude? I mean maybe anything, right? For now, I would suggest taking it at face value and if you are into her, see what happens. If it fails, it fails...but don't sabotage it, let it happen. 2
Erdbeere Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 We cannot comment until you explain how you feel about her and the goings on.
Author Daking123 Posted February 10, 2016 Author Posted February 10, 2016 I've been dating this girl since December 26th but she had just ended a 3 year relationship December 14th. -we first started talking beginning of November but she said "she couldn't continue because her heart was with her ex" - a week later she came back and we talked again. But she left me again 2 weeks later for her ex. - she came back a month later and we've been together since. She is very emotional at times. She can be extremely happy and hot one minute then distant and cold the next. -We've hung out almost everyday she basically stays with me from time to time. The only problem I've seen from her she stalks her ex Twitter account daily. The past 2 weeks she has innitited contact with him twice through text and twice the call. a lot of people have told me to be careful because as we just started dating and she already speaking about kids, me being her soul mate, and her posting pictures of us up non stop. Because they feel she's trying to catch us up to where she left off with her ex. she always tells me I'm a blessing, the best she has ever had, and wants a long future with me.
LostOnes05 Posted February 10, 2016 Posted February 10, 2016 Indeed, you are a rebound. Enjoy it while it lasts. 1
Redhead14 Posted February 10, 2016 Posted February 10, 2016 (edited) I've been dating this girl since December 26th but she had just ended a 3 year relationship December 14th. -we first started talking beginning of November but she said "she couldn't continue because her heart was with her ex" - a week later she came back and we talked again. But she left me again 2 weeks later for her ex. - she came back a month later and we've been together since. She is very emotional at times. She can be extremely happy and hot one minute then distant and cold the next. -We've hung out almost everyday she basically stays with me from time to time. The only problem I've seen from her she stalks her ex Twitter account daily. The past 2 weeks she has innitited contact with him twice through text and twice the call. a lot of people have told me to be careful because as we just started dating and she already speaking about kids, me being her soul mate, and her posting pictures of us up non stop. Because they feel she's trying to catch us up to where she left off with her ex. she always tells me I'm a blessing, the best she has ever had, and wants a long future with me. Your friends are correct. She's going to blow hot and cold with you because her emotions are running high and low. She's struggling with the very fresh wound of a break up. She's seeking quick comfort from someone new as a distraction from that pain. But, at some point, the reality of her situation will hit her again and she will pull away, go back to her boyfriend behind your back for a while, and/or dump you. You've seen that a couple of times already. Tell her you've enjoyed the time spent with her but it's clear to you that she needs to some time to process her break up and wish her well. Edited February 10, 2016 by Redhead14
Jabron1 Posted February 10, 2016 Posted February 10, 2016 Hangout, have fun, and hook-up. But, don't catch feelings for her. -We've hung out almost everyday she basically stays with me from time to time. I don't like that. Haven't you got a busy life? You shouldn't be seeing her every day. Women fall in love with you in your absence, not by being around you every second. It sounds like she's using you as some sort of crutch.
quattrob Posted February 11, 2016 Posted February 11, 2016 Walk away... Fast. It's either you walk away or you wait until she does because she WILL. 1
lop98 Posted February 11, 2016 Posted February 11, 2016 I did the rebound thing. It's lame and it took me over 2 years to admit to myself that it was a rebound. I can tell you that I went for it like there was no tomorrow (pretty much in proportion of the pain I was feeling after the breakup), lots of sex, all kinds of sex too, PDA everywhere (even on the street), and making sure the ex knew. I was so hurt and so vulnerable and felt so rejected that this new source of love and attention felt like both justice and the best medicine ever. Eventually, after enough time on my own, I healed... and the guy (I don't want to call him the rebound but that guy yeah) well, I realized I didn't feel much for him after all. It's probably the only ex I do not miss one bit or even think of him. One of the most selfish things I've done. This girl is 100% rebounding. What I would do is to walk away and cut all forms of contact immediately and stick to that with zero moments of weakness and "how are you?" in between, for at least a year. She needs to learn how to value you, you need to value yourself more too, and if you love her already, you have to step out of this situation so that once she's in a better place, you can have a better role in her life, not just backup person. If that's too hard, then the less mature but probably less cruel option for both of you is to keep things super casual, knowing it's going to end because the relationship is sustained on her recovery and not on the usual values of long-lasting relationships (trust, friendship, etc). 1
mightycpa Posted February 11, 2016 Posted February 11, 2016 Dump her, kindly, and then give her some time to process the old relationship out of her system. Then move in for the kill.
mrwigand Posted February 11, 2016 Posted February 11, 2016 It all depends on what your expectations are. If you're cool with something casual and FWBish, then it's not necessarily a problem. But if you're thinking this is going to be a serious, healthy relationship with a future, then you definitely need to leave, because that is not what this relationship is or most likely will be. 1
Author Daking123 Posted February 11, 2016 Author Posted February 11, 2016 I did the rebound thing. It's lame and it took me over 2 years to admit to myself that it was a rebound. I can tell you that I went for it like there was no tomorrow (pretty much in proportion of the pain I was feeling after the breakup), lots of sex, all kinds of sex too, PDA everywhere (even on the street), and making sure the ex knew. I was so hurt and so vulnerable and felt so rejected that this new source of love and attention felt like both justice and the best medicine ever. Eventually, after enough time on my own, I healed... and the guy (I don't want to call him the rebound but that guy yeah) well, I realized I didn't feel much for him after all. It's probably the only ex I do not miss one bit or even think of him. One of the most selfish things I've done. This girl is 100% rebounding. What I would do is to walk away and cut all forms of contact immediately and stick to that with zero moments of weakness and "how are you?" in between, for at least a year. She needs to learn how to value you, you need to value yourself more too, and if you love her already, you have to step out of this situation so that once she's in a better place, you can have a better role in her life, not just backup person. If that's too hard, then the less mature but probably less cruel option for both of you is to keep things super casual, knowing it's going to end because the relationship is sustained on her recovery and not on the usual values of long-lasting relationships (trust, friendship, etc). So with us spending majority of our time together is for her comfort. She's always calling me her blessing and showing me off on social media. It makes me feel like she's serious about us
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