cudenver Posted February 18, 2016 Posted February 18, 2016 I have just given up on finding a gf. Tried so hard but can't even get a women too look at me. I have so much love to give up no one wants It I guess. What ever I do is wrong, from what I say to what wear. Guess it was never meant to be ever. Can't believe I'm 31 already and have not found anyone. Maybe it'd time to just give up on everything for good
ExpatInItaly Posted February 18, 2016 Posted February 18, 2016 OP, where/how are you meeting women? What kind of image and character do your present? What do you bring to the table? We might be able to give you some pointers if you paint a broader picture for us. 1
road Posted February 18, 2016 Posted February 18, 2016 I have just given up on finding a gf. Tried so hard but can't even get a women too look at me. I have so much love to give up no one wants It I guess. What ever I do is wrong, from what I say to what wear. Guess it was never meant to be ever. Can't believe I'm 31 already and have not found anyone. Maybe it'd time to just give up on everything for good Always pays off to pause and think before saying something to regret. Well if you what you wear is a problem then why have you not thrown out those offending clothes and improve your look? Do you work out, are you toned? You see even if a man is a 0 or a 1 by him no longer putting his foot in his mouth, dressing well, being fit he can turn himself into a 4-6. Now being a 4-6 may not sound great to you. But a man being squarely in the average group/middle tier is not as good as the top tier though it is a lot better then being in the bottom tier. 1
BronzeAgeJaeger217 Posted February 18, 2016 Posted February 18, 2016 So in other words, never had a gf before OP?
feb87 Posted February 18, 2016 Posted February 18, 2016 I have just given up on finding a gf. Tried so hard but can't even get a women too look at me. I have so much love to give up no one wants It I guess. What ever I do is wrong, from what I say to what wear. Guess it was never meant to be ever. Can't believe I'm 31 already and have not found anyone. Maybe it'd time to just give up on everything for good There's someone out there for everyone. Some people wait a lifetime to find 'the one.' Put yourself out there. Internet date, join singles social clubs, etc.
bluefeather Posted February 18, 2016 Posted February 18, 2016 you might benefit from a real friend or a coach of some kind. someone who could help you with dating and/or being more confident. there are people out there who will help you with this if you pay money. there are also therapists, but they are probably more expensive. and books too. if you have not used all of these options yet, it would be foolish to give up.
brokengirl85 Posted February 22, 2016 Posted February 22, 2016 I have just given up on finding a gf. Tried so hard but can't even get a women too look at me. I have so much love to give up no one wants It I guess. What ever I do is wrong, from what I say to what wear. Guess it was never meant to be ever. Can't believe I'm 31 already and have not found anyone. Maybe it'd time to just give up on everything for good Don't give up just yet I haven't found anyone that loves me either. I'm sad and lonely but I still think ill find someone in the future. Someone who will accept me and love me in a healthy way. I'm preparing for that, nurturing myself, learning about myself, learning about previous mistakes, trying to be happy with myself. See? There's tons to do before I'm ready for that special someone
ZA Dater Posted February 22, 2016 Posted February 22, 2016 There's someone out there for everyone. Some people wait a lifetime to find 'the one.' Put yourself out there. Internet date, join singles social clubs, etc. I totally disagree, please quantify this statement with fact rather that supposition. The fact is many people never find anyone at all, saying otherwise is to ignore reality and paint an unrealistic idyllic picture.
ZA Dater Posted February 22, 2016 Posted February 22, 2016 I have just given up on finding a gf. Tried so hard but can't even get a women too look at me. I have so much love to give up no one wants It I guess. What ever I do is wrong, from what I say to what wear. Guess it was never meant to be ever. Can't believe I'm 31 already and have not found anyone. Maybe it'd time to just give up on everything for good We could be twins! Seriously though I am also 31 and enjoyed zero success at all, like you it was about the way I dressed and then what I said or didn't say. I changed the clothes, now apparently I look "good" but its made zero difference. Like you I have a lot to give and its extremely hurtful to just find nobody I like ever likes me, I am sure you are familiar with this scenario. The problem with giving up for good is its actually not impossible, as people we are driven to find that companionship, there is always that curiosity, the only way one would give up would be remove oneself from society and become a recluse because all around us we are reminded we have nobody. People here will chime in shortly with "therapy, dating coaches", its up to you whether you want to go down that route but the overwhelming evidence is you aren't alone with having zero success, there are many, many people on this forum with the same situation. What you can do is try be the best you can be each day, set yourself non dating related goals and try do enough to distract yourself.
AverageJoe1986 Posted February 22, 2016 Posted February 22, 2016 I'm getting to the same point mate. Fed up of banging my head into a brick wall.
smudge21 Posted February 22, 2016 Posted February 22, 2016 I look back and wonder how I even got any interest over the years, but somehow I did. The thing is, I never really have gone looking. I've always been very push away to the whole idea of being with someone 24/7 so it's held me back but it's also meant I've shown interest in people who don't in me. It's an odd one but I do know that when things have happened, they've happened when I definitely 100% haven't been wanting them to. This is usually when I'm focused on other things or doing something that clearly is so opposite of looking for a partner. Mixing with other people during these times and just being myself seems to work. I'm not saying all the time or even that all of them turned out to be something good (one brought me here 5 years ago and my current interest is hurting me now) but at least they happened. Maybe it's when you're not putting out those desperate vibes that others, girls, get attracted. Maybe then you're seen as a challenge. With that said, focus on you and what you want to do in life (31 is still very young). Go do things you want to do. You may find people just come along when you're not looking for them. There's no guaranteed way to meet someone and fall in love, but giving up will guarantee you never do.
BronzeAgeJaeger217 Posted February 22, 2016 Posted February 22, 2016 Ya oh well, my biology professor told me a few years ago that very few of the male Mallard ducks get to mate 1
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