Guys asking for body photos OLD

February 17, 2016

I had a mix of tasteful shots on my profile and guess what? It doesn't matter.

For the vast majority of men online, there are never enough pics and within seconds of chatting they will inevitably start begging for more pics, including "special" request shots. Gimme a break.

Or better yet, they'll send a few of their own naughty pics unsolicited with the expectation of reciprocation.

Ugh.

At the end of the day an a**hole is an a**hole be it online or in real life. Just got to tune them out or block them if/when they get too aggressive.

'Tis the life of OLD :/

Edited February 17, 2016 by Michelle ma Belle

February 17, 2016

I had a mix of tasteful shots on my profile and guess what? It doesn't matter.

For the vast majority of men online, there are never enough pics and within seconds of chatting they will inevitably start begging for more pics, including "special" request shots. Gimme a break.

Or better yet, they'll send a few of their own naughty pics unsolicited with the expectation of reciprocation.

Ugh.

At the end of the day an a**hole is and a**hole be in online or in real life. Just got to tune them out or block them if/when they get too aggressive.

'Tis the life of OLD :/

And to keep saying- well we need to see more photos of you, so we know what you will look like in person...I mean, just try to meet me in person! Many, many guys I've gone out with look much different than in their photos. Mostly I feel like the need to ask for more photos is just stalling because they don't actually want to go out with you, and they're looking for reasons not to ask you out in the first place. I just think it's dating laziness on some level.

February 17, 2016

Geez. Okay fine- men of loveshack- you all have it so much worse and more difficult than we women do.

Html- Is this what you want to hear? I'm tired of arguing.

February 17, 2016

And to keep saying- well we need to see more photos of you, so we know what you will look like in person...I mean, just try to meet me in person! Many, many guys I've gone out with look much different than in their photos. Mostly I feel like the need to ask for more photos is just stalling because they don't actually want to go out with you, and they're looking for reasons not to ask you out in the first place. I just think it's dating laziness on some level.

To be fair, there are plenty of women on OLD that use it as an ego boost or just to be text buddies. They have no intention of going out with guys either. Bottom line is if you don't want to deal with all of the negatives of OLD. Then don't. If you don't have trouble meeting people in person, than just do that. But if you stick with OLD, eventually you'll get very good at sniffing out the undesirables pretty quickly. And all of the vulgar messages won't faze you anymore.

February 17, 2016

And to keep saying- well we need to see more photos of you, so we know what you will look like in person...I mean, just try to meet me in person! Many, many guys I've gone out with look much different than in their photos. Mostly I feel like the need to ask for more photos is just stalling because they don't actually want to go out with you, and they're looking for reasons not to ask you out in the first place. I just think it's dating laziness on some level.

EXACTLY! I mean, we're on a dating site to...umm....I don't know...DATE!

Yes, dating laziness is the perfect description for it. And I'm sure it goes both ways although I think the reasons why men and women behave like this are very different.

I'm no snob and definitely no prude and have been known to blow up a guys phone with all sorts of pic requests BUT get to know me first me for heaven's sake. At least make an effort that shows you're looking for more than just a bunch of random pics to add to your wank bank. Geez

February 17, 2016

I agree with you, but I think the way some (in OP's case, men) choose to express their attraction can be decidedly ... unattractive.

If it's a difference between "hey b**ch, I wanna f**k them t**ties," and silence, I would prefer silence.

And yes, men do send those types of messages on OLD.

I found at least one or two people here who understand. It's more helpful than you know

Ladies, all men look at a rack and some say stuff like that, though all men think that.

Look at this way: whether or not if it boosts a woman's self esteem, whether or not they find it disgusting.

Look at this way: these knuckle draggers just make your job screening OLD applicants fast and easy when it comes which men to discard.

February 17, 2016

And to keep saying- well we need to see more photos of you, so we know what you will look like in person...I mean, just try to meet me in person! Many, many guys I've gone out with look much different than in their photos. Mostly I feel like the need to ask for more photos is just stalling because they don't actually want to go out with you, and they're looking for reasons not to ask you out in the first place. I just think it's dating laziness on some level.

Exactly - i hate wasting time back and forth messaging. Maybe thats why I never bother asking for pics (well that plus I wont swipe anyone without decent pics).

However, Ive found that the majority of women go silent the minute I suggest meeting up. Is it the same for you if you suggest to men?

I did actually get asked for another pic once!

I was pretty flattered, and I took the opportunity to suggest we meet in person. I never heard from her again.

Personally, I've stopped all OLD (except Tinder a little), and have gone back to more organic ways of meeting people.

February 17, 2016

Why is it okay for you to say I should get a thicker skin yet men can keep saying how much they are degraded by not getting responses for women? Why do men also not need to get a thicker skin? I do feel bad for men who never get responses from OLD, I've never said you should suck it up. I'm not sure why my complaint is bothering you so much.

Simple: because a man acts immature it is a reflection on himself not the woman. It is not a reflection on her.

However being a man. I know it is a mans place to man up/suck it up when women say no when we ask them out on a date in real life, and when we never get an OLD response back from the women we click on.

Just because we like a woman she is not obligated to like us back. Just as there are women that we would never want to date.

February 17, 2016

The girl who just said that she used Tinder for an ego boost is claiming that I am posting this entire thread just to get attention. Ironic?

Not, practical.In love, like in business, it's all about segmentation. Tinder is for attention seekers - and those looking for something easy, no heavy dating stuff. I've already explained my position - real OLD sites - in my humble opinion - are paid. Dudes looking for hook ups won't pay hundreds of $ just to show their private to gals.

Super happy for you that you have not had these negative experiences. Sending a dic picture is pretty much degrading as well, but you have a different opinion of what's appropriate for dating than I do. But yes, getting dirty nasty messages in OLD does happen to other people. All the time.

Well, it's not my dic, I don't care. My point is: yes, receiving nasty messages happen, but not to everyone and not everywhere. Maybe French speaking people in Europe aren't quite that aggressive, I dunno.

In all honesty, I have heard about friends of mine complaining of regular dudes posing in honest men only to fish for a hook up, but I didn't hear about sleezy messages landing on their inbox all of a sudden. The reporting culture in Europe is strong, and again, men tend to not expose themselves to losing their hundred $ investment without making sure they get something in exchange.

Target better, complain less.

February 17, 2016

The reason men ask for full body pictures is because a LOT!!!! of women lie about their weight. Profiles with only their face and sometimes even photos that are all a couple of years old, if you're obese that's a deliberate lie. I'm not even kidding when I say I've gone on dates with women that looked healthy on their photos, and probably weighed as much as I did when I saw them face to face. Obesity is so unattractive (not just because of the looks but also because it signifies someone that won't bother keeping their body in good health) that, no matter how awesome the personality is most men don't even want to give it a shot. They'd rather know she's obese beforehand so that they won't waste time coming to the date.

It's not because men want your picture to jerk off to it or use it in some satanic ritual, it's because men want to know that you're not obese.

February 17, 2016

This is a no and a NEXT! Sending pics before meeting up in person is unacceptable! Why waste time???? Guys are dumb when they do this, seriously, just meet up and be done with it. What's the harm of a guy meeting up and seeing the girl in person! Then he can see her body! I don't care what excuses people make about lying who they are on OLD- guys complain about this, but how do we know they aren't lying if they are a over weight geezer too?

Back in the day when men were men and women were women there was no OLD. Men did not ask out women that they never saw. The desire for the man to ask a woman out was based on what he saw. The woman's response to the man was based on what she saw.

Many people back in the day did not want blind dates because they did not know what they were getting into. So what does he/she look like? Oh, they have a great personality.

OLD has not replaced the need to see what the man/woman looks like.

Back in the day they were men disrespectful to women that they approached. It is not a surprise that there are still men as that. Back then a woman would ignore and walk away. That was the best response for it did not even let the jerks get any satisfaction from getting a rise out of the ladies.

With OLD that same ignore and walk away is the best response. Human kind will never run out of jerks.

Having OLD has not replaced the need to see.

February 17, 2016

This is actually a very informative thread, because it follows to a T the pattern of a lot of issues between the genders when it comes to dating:

1. Due to bad experiences, women often act in a way that seems overly self-protective to the point of sabotaging. In this case not posting a full-body picture of herself. And blocking anyone who asks for a full-body shot. (Which makes her look like a catfish or that she has something to hide, IMO, even to the good guys.)

2. However, the guys, instead of seeing where the women are coming from, come back with "that's a problem I'd love to have!" or "I'd never do that" and accuse the women of "monsters under the bed" thinking say that the solution is better boundaries, a better picker, ect.

3. And round-and-round we go.

AMJ I don't know what to tell you. I DO thank you because I always wondered why women post a gazzilion head-shots and no full-body shots of themselves in their OLD profiles, now I know why.

BUT, I am physically attracted to someone from the neck down too. I don't mind "curvy" at all but I do need to know that the woman in question is athletic and takes care of herself physically. What you need to realize: 1. Other women (your competition) ARE still posting full-body shots of themselves. They seem to deal with it. 2. I'm not a fan of asking for more pictures after we make contact--it feels awkward ending it with someone right after they send you a picture of themselves, or to waste everyone's time going on a date where you already know it won't work. 3. Come to think about it, I have NEVER met up with anyone when I didn't see a full-body picture beforehand, in her profile. I just don't have time to be giving a few hours to someone where I have no idea whether there will be attraction, and looks (from the neck down) are a huge part of it. And again, your competition is posting pictures, so.... Just being blunt here....

Edited February 17, 2016 by Imajerk17

February 17, 2016

I don't get it why would giving a guy a full body shot be such a big thing unless you have something to hide? Not saying you OP but a lot of us women lie about our weight hoping our personality's win the guys over its stupid..and its a waist of everyone's time not to mention disrespectful.

If its honestly just that you are fit and some guys are pigs then block them it takes all kinds or try meeting men in public but I wouldn't block a guy just cause they ask to see what you look like full body that kinda defeats the purpose on finding a good match on line no?

February 17, 2016

Reminder from moderation:

The thread starter is seeking advice about how women respond to men asking for full body photos. Posters should not be using this thread for general discussion of OLD, which gender has it worse in dating, or anything else.

Future postings that are off-topic will be deleted.

Thank you,

~6

I completely understand why a man would want to see a head-to-toe photo of a woman before asking her out. Likewise, I'm also interested in what their body looks like. I don't like posting photos that show my entire body, mainly because I cannot stand all of the creepy messages that guys will send. While I understand why men want to see what my body looks like, I honestly can't really believe that they think it's acceptable to ask me for body photos. I'm actually just throwing this topic out here for more female opinions- how do you respond to this?

----From original William - it appears a couple of members are getting posts auto-moderated so they're appearing late. We apologize for that and suggest those members try grabbing another internet provider or address and re-trying later.

Also, though I approved some posts prior to our other moderator's directive, posts after the directive shall respect it, so don't quote off-topic posts and continue off-topic discussion or you'll get a sanction for both going off-topic and ignoring moderation's directive. Thanks!

Edited February 17, 2016 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Added content

February 18, 2016

Should a guy feel offended with you asking his occupation if it isn't listed? If not, Then same applies here.

February 18, 2016

I completely understand why a man would want to see a head-to-toe photo of a woman before asking her out. Likewise, I'm also interested in what their body looks like. I don't like posting photos that show my entire body, mainly because I cannot stand all of the creepy messages that guys will send. While I understand why men want to see what my body looks like, I honestly can't really believe that they think it's acceptable to ask me for body photos. I'm actually just throwing this topic out here for more female opinions- how do you respond to this?

Why would guys send creepier messages than normal because of body pics? (Barring maybe super suggestive ones).

I have had profiles of the waist up or chest up and men still commented about my cleavage or lips. My roommate made a profile where only the back of her head was in her picture and got creepy messages still. Creeps will be creeps regardless.

However, I generally put both face and body pics so that someone choosing me is at the least attracted to me physically and won't be surprised about anything. However, you have guys who will immediately start asking for "more pics," that for me is a bit of a turn off, depending on how they go about it. If we exchanged numbers and had some kind of interesting phone conversation and have been texting then I will maybe Snapchat them or volunteer other photos or if they send me some and ask then it's less weird than when they just message you online asking or after a few texts or something seem to be demanding pics...if they ask for "sexy pics" just cut them off. If you've not even been on a date and a man wants you to send him provocative pics, it's not a good sign.

February 18, 2016

If you've been chatting for some time and they want more photos, I still would say no. At that point, I'd say "Only one way to find out." I'm disgusted by the level of guarantee men are asking for in OLD. How can I be sure you have boobs? How can I be sure you won't reject me? How can I be sure you'll sleep with me? Man up, that's how.

February 18, 2016

This is so depressing. Perhaps take a break from OLD and go out into the real world.

I'm a huge fan of taking breaks from OLD and meeting men in the real world, I promise. I've only dated briefly a few guys from OLD and it's never amounted to much. I don't really think it will ever amount to much for me in terms of a relationship, but figure it can't hurt to try. Until I realize that it does hurt to try.

February 18, 2016

Exactly - i hate wasting time back and forth messaging. Maybe thats why I never bother asking for pics (well that plus I wont swipe anyone without decent pics).

However, Ive found that the majority of women go silent the minute I suggest meeting up. Is it the same for you if you suggest to men?

I did actually get asked for another pic once!
I was pretty flattered, and I took the opportunity to suggest we meet in person. I never heard from her again.

Personally, I've stopped all OLD (except Tinder a little), and have gone back to more organic ways of meeting people.

If I suggest meeting in person, men never respond. So I stopped doing that.

When they suggest we meet in person, most of them never actually follow up with making an actual plan.

February 18, 2016

Back in the day when men were men and women were women there was no OLD. Men did not ask out women that they never saw. The desire for the man to ask a woman out was based on what he saw. The woman's response to the man was based on what she saw.

Many people back in the day did not want blind dates because they did not know what they were getting into. So what does he/she look like? Oh, they have a great personality.

OLD has not replaced the need to see what the man/woman looks like.

Back in the day they were men disrespectful to women that they approached. It is not a surprise that there are still men as that. Back then a woman would ignore and walk away. That was the best response for it did not even let the jerks get any satisfaction from getting a rise out of the ladies.

With OLD that same ignore and walk away is the best response. Human kind will never run out of jerks.

Having OLD has not replaced the need to see.

I appreciate this- and agree completely that physical attraction is necessary. I will say though, that men being disrespectful online is much easier for them than it is in person, therefore it seems to happen much more often. OLD makes men who probably would never in a million years have the confidence to approach me in person, send me messages.

That's not a problem, but when they think they can get away with really inappropriate messages, it is a problem. It's hard to ignore sometimes. Or all the time. Losangelena was saying that I need a happy medium, and I agree. I thought my happy medium could be to not post pictures that will invite rude comments, but I'm not sure if that's the answer either.

February 18, 2016

If you've been chatting for some time and they want more photos, I still would say no. At that point, I'd say "Only one way to find out." I'm disgusted by the level of guarantee men are asking for in OLD. How can I be sure you have boobs? How can I be sure you won't reject me? How can I be sure you'll sleep with me? Man up, that's how.

I wish I could like this comment ten more times. It's like they are the only ones who are fragile and need their ego to be protected.

February 18, 2016

Should a guy feel offended with you asking his occupation if it isn't listed? If not, Then same applies here.

Well, I'd say this isn't really an equal comparison. If I asked him to see his full resume, then yes- it's the same thing. Or college transcripts. Because hey, I don't believe that you actually went to UCLA Law School. You probably went to UCLA extension and work as a legal secretary.

February 18, 2016

This is actually a very informative thread, because it follows to a T the pattern of a lot of issues between the genders when it comes to dating:

1. Due to bad experiences, women often act in a way that seems overly self-protective to the point of sabotaging. In this case not posting a full-body picture of herself. And blocking anyone who asks for a full-body shot. (Which makes her look like a catfish or that she has something to hide, IMO, even to the good guys.)

2. However, the guys, instead of seeing where the women are coming from, come back with "that's a problem I'd love to have!" or "I'd never do that" and accuse the women of "monsters under the bed" thinking say that the solution is better boundaries, a better picker, ect.

3. And round-and-round we go.

AMJ I don't know what to tell you. I DO thank you because I always wondered why women post a gazzilion head-shots and no full-body shots of themselves in their OLD profiles, now I know why.

BUT, I am physically attracted to someone from the neck down too. I don't mind "curvy" at all but I do need to know that the woman in question is athletic and takes care of herself physically. What you need to realize: 1. Other women (your competition) ARE still posting full-body shots of themselves. They seem to deal with it. 2. I'm not a fan of asking for more pictures after we make contact--it feels awkward ending it with someone right after they send you a picture of themselves, or to waste everyone's time going on a date where you already know it won't work. 3. Come to think about it, I have NEVER met up with anyone when I didn't see a full-body picture beforehand, in her profile. I just don't have time to be giving a few hours to someone where I have no idea whether there will be attraction, and looks (from the neck down) are a huge part of it. And again, your competition is posting pictures, so.... Just being blunt here....

A thoughtful post! I love those. Sure, there are women who only post head photos because they don't like their body. There are men who do this, too. But I think there are lots of women like me, who are sick and tired of nasty comments.

Actually it's been nice to talk to guys who are still willing to talk to me without the body picture- and there's plenty of them. It's kind of a test, and I already know they're looking for more than FWB. Finally, my picker IS broken, otherwise I wouldn't be in this situation at all.

I probably will throw the body pictures back on. If it's interesting, I'll post updates here. Honestly though, one nasty comment and I'll probably cash the whole thing and go on a OLD hiatus.

February 18, 2016

This is a no and a NEXT! Sending pics before meeting up in person is unacceptable! Why waste time???? Guys are dumb when they do this, seriously, just meet up and be done with it. What's the harm of a guy meeting up and seeing the girl in person! Then he can see her body! I don't care what excuses people make about lying who they are on OLD- guys complain about this, but how do we know they aren't lying if they are a over weight geezer too?

The same question could be asked to you. What's the harm is sending one regular fully clothed picture? I mean I could understand the outrage if a guy demanded a nude pic. But..the way that it comes off when she acts offended over such a simple request is :

1) She has no confidence

2) Or she's protesting to distract from the fact that she's embarrassed her body doesn't match the description on her profile. So she's got something to hide.

Finally, time is valuable to some people. I mean let's say you had two choices. 1) Finding out in ten seconds if it's not a good fit. 2) Making plans, getting ready, and being on a date you never should have been on. Personally, I'll take the ten seconds. Just saying....

Edited February 18, 2016 by fitnessfan365

February 18, 2016

Maybe you need to get a thicker skin and reframe your thinking.

Men are primed to want sex. Tinder was designed as a hookup app. if you are getting lots of attention, then you are successful. If you really get so offended and find it so degrading then I suggest not using it.

Personally I'd love some degrading. Just one suggestive message, one comment about my ass! Never got as much as one

I tried that with a guy yesterday...

I got the same response I would have given...

... silence!

Saying all that stuff is fine when you are in a relationship but saying it to some random stranger over the internet - not fine...

If some guy came up to me in a supermarket and said that he would get a foot in the balls and a slap round the face...

Protect your balls. Say those things once you are in a relationship not before...

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