Tuutuu22 Posted February 16, 2016 Share Posted February 16, 2016 My ex and I have a lot of history. When I finally decided to give him a shot we dated for 3months then he broke up with me out of no where through a text. I wished him the best and moved on. I know why it ended and imnot blaming myself but I became too attached and I was putting in the effort and he wasn't. He was so used to chasing me for so many years I think once he had me he didn't know what to do. Of course I was hurt but what made it worse was I came to find out right after that he hooked up with my "friend". Due to our history I felt like not only did I lose my boyfriend I lost a best friend. We were very close. About a month after we broke up he wanted me back but I wasn't open to the idea. Two months past he still was trying so I went on one date with him and it went well but two days after that I met my boyfriend that I have now (we've been dating for a year and a half. He is a great person. He is loving and very loyal. He always puts in an effort unlike my ex. We've had bad times in the past, we both can be very stubborn when we argue but we have gotten better. I love my boyfriend. However, my ex still doesn't leave me be. From the day I started dating my boyfriend he won't stop begging for me back. I told him to move on and he does for a couple of months but then comes back and says no other girl is me. I feel like it's the chase once again. I can't tell if my ex truly loves me or if it's all just bull****. I know I shouldn't care but I do love and care about him. I've always been loyal to my boyfriend and I tell my ex to stop but there are some things about my ex I find unforgettable. I just don't know what to do or if I have to do anything. And I also don't know if my ex is in love wth the chase or not because it has been two years now I would figure he would've given up especially bc he knows I'm in a relationship and I tell him to move on. Thoughts? Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted February 16, 2016 Share Posted February 16, 2016 This isn't good. You need to block your ex on everything Make it impossible for him to contact you. Does your current boyfriend know about your feelings for your ex? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Tuutuu22 Posted February 16, 2016 Author Share Posted February 16, 2016 This isn't good. You need to block your ex on everything Make it impossible for him to contact you. Does your current boyfriend know about your feelings for your ex? I feel like if i block him ill wonder if he has tried to contact me. And my boyfriend hates him he has no idea. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted February 16, 2016 Share Posted February 16, 2016 I feel like if i block him ill wonder if he has tried to contact me. And my boyfriend hates him he has no idea. If you value your relationship with your boyfriend, you will cut this ex out of your life. If you're still reluctant to do so, you need to re-examine exactly why you're with your current boyfriend. Not a good sign. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
lilmissjava Posted February 16, 2016 Share Posted February 16, 2016 This is so unfair to your current boyfriend. You know the history with you and your ex. Once the chase is over, everything planes out. If you have such a great guy now, why would you risk everything for someone who won't be there for you after a few months? I think you like the attention your ex is giving you. No contact if you genuinely care about your current boyfriend. The alternative is history repeating itself. Like being hurt. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Zahara Posted February 16, 2016 Share Posted February 16, 2016 I feel like if i block him ill wonder if he has tried to contact me. And my boyfriend hates him he has no idea. But he has tried to contact you and this has only kept you sitting on the fence. Are you going to act on it? You either end it with your boyfriend and take a chance on this guy or block your ex and focus on what you have infront of you. You cannot have it both ways. If the roles were reversed, you'd be very hurt. I have a feeling this guy loves the chase and likely is the type that doesn't want you but doesn't want anyone else to have you. Probably sniffs around every few months when he has no available prospects. Seeing that you entertain his drama, he always comes back to you because he's hoping that maybe it's an opportunity. I have to wonder if he hooked up with your friend after your break-up. You sure there was no funny stuff/overlapping going on while you were dating? Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted February 16, 2016 Share Posted February 16, 2016 I feel like if i block him ill wonder if he has tried to contact me. And my boyfriend hates him he has no idea. As I said, not good. You are not being fair to your current boyfriend, at all. Good relationships are not made out of secrets and lies. Link to post Share on other sites
Zoe5.5 Posted February 18, 2016 Share Posted February 18, 2016 My ex and I have a lot of history. When I finally decided to give him a shot we dated for 3months then he broke up with me out of no where through a text. I wished him the best and moved on. I know why it ended and imnot blaming myself but I became too attached and I was putting in the effort and he wasn't. He was so used to chasing me for so many years I think once he had me he didn't know what to do. Of course I was hurt but what made it worse was I came to find out right after that he hooked up with my "friend". Due to our history I felt like not only did I lose my boyfriend I lost a best friend. We were very close. About a month after we broke up he wanted me back but I wasn't open to the idea. Two months past he still was trying so I went on one date with him and it went well but two days after that I met my boyfriend that I have now (we've been dating for a year and a half. He is a great person. He is loving and very loyal. He always puts in an effort unlike my ex. We've had bad times in the past, we both can be very stubborn when we argue but we have gotten better. I love my boyfriend. However, my ex still doesn't leave me be. From the day I started dating my boyfriend he won't stop begging for me back. I told him to move on and he does for a couple of months but then comes back and says no other girl is me. I feel like it's the chase once again. I can't tell if my ex truly loves me or if it's all just bull****. I know I shouldn't care but I do love and care about him. I've always been loyal to my boyfriend and I tell my ex to stop but there are some things about my ex I find unforgettable. I just don't know what to do or if I have to do anything. And I also don't know if my ex is in love wth the chase or not because it has been two years now I would figure he would've given up especially bc he knows I'm in a relationship and I tell him to move on. Thoughts? Hello , If I may suggest something, I would start by examining your heart. Really find out where your affections fall and then pursue that avenue. Establish some healthy boundaries with both your current boyfriend and your ex. Make sure your intentions are crystal clear for both parties. What I am stating is establish some healthy boundaries that maybe would allow you and the ex to remain respected friends while you date the other guy. Also do the same for the other boy friend so he too will know where he stands with you and your former boyfriend. I hope this suggestive wisdom will help with your decision making as it has with me and my wife over the years. Thank you and have a beautiful day! Link to post Share on other sites
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