kztar Posted February 15, 2016 Posted February 15, 2016 Hi everyone, I am new to this forum and i've found the community here to be very supportive and helpful to each other. Long story but thanks for reading in advance I recently broke up with an EX boyfriend (about a month ago) after being together for 1.5 years. At some point I felt like he was the "one" but ever since i've started using common logic I must say he was certainly not the one. So a little bit of background on whole before during and after the relationship. Prior to this relationship I was single for 4 Years and I was living the life. I was doing what most 25(my age) year olds are doing in NYC. Partying, drinking, having fun hanging out with friends and basically living the life. I was literally going out and having fun 6/7 days a week and using 1 day to rest. Whooohooo I was the happiest single person in the planet. Then on summer 2014 I guess I was just doing TOO much and I ended up sustaining a terrible back injury. This injury changed my life completely. I had to take a full week off from work, could not drive my own vehicle to places, had to get plenty of bed rest, could no longer enjoy my life the way I was previously doing it and basically had no other option to become a home body. After this injury I was miserable but I had this group trip pre-planned which is where I met my Ex. This trip was paid for months in advance before I sustained my injury so I decided to go with my crooked self and attempt to make the best of it. Well there I met this guy (my EX) that happened to be cousins with my friend the one that invited me on the trip. We were riding in the same car and we instantly started conversing. I must say I was in a lot of pain and honestly I didn't think he was attractive. Well finally we reach our destination and throughout the whole trip this guy made it his business to not leave me alone. I was enjoying the attention but again, I was still not attracted to him. After the trip was over we exchanged numbers and he called me that same night. Then we started texting, doing more talking on the phone and going out on really nice dates. This guy was literally head over hells for me so I decided to give him a chance. He was very insecure at first and would tell me things like "i know you're going to break my heart one day but im going to date you anyway". Eventually this faded and we started enjoying our fresh relationship and bla bla bla He told me he was in love with me and I felt the same and so on. Fast forward to 8 months later we go on an international vacation and had alot of fun. We returned and things started getting iffy. Red flags everywhere but I ignored. We basically spent all summer together and did NOTHING all damn summer besides going to the beach once and playing mini golf, a few family outings and thats it. As the red flags continued, I also continued to ignore. There was one time he told me im confused I don't think im in love with you and so on. I thought this was just confusion but that he would come back to his senses. This never happened and things just got worse and worse. I did everything I could to have him get those feelings back but you know what, whats not in your heart is not there. About a month ago, I was sick and had to rush to the ER and he complained about something always being wrong with me and told me that he'd rather be alone. He said I am too needy, require too much attention, and don't have any hobbies to invest my time besides him. While I do like yoga and reading, im not a big fan of having to do things on my time off. Before I met him i had no time off, i was OUT all the time living the life. I enjoy cleaning my apartment, sleeping, watching tv. I guess not real hobbies. This is when i broke things off, and i said you can go be alone since im a "problem" in your life. I went to his house and picked up all my belongings and left. For the past month i've been dealing with alot of anxiety, stress, and all the other ****ty **** that comes with a breakup. For some stupid reason, I had hope that we would be able to work through this. Today I met up with him to give him a closure letter that I had written, with the hopes of working things out. He said he was sorry but he wasn't ready for a serious relationship because he's never been in one, he's sorry im hurt but he just doesn't love me. He said that he was trying to break up with me for a while but he didn't know how to do it because I was the Perfect girlfriend. After we broke up he did text me asking me how I was and saying that he missed me. (FALSE HOPE ) Anyhow, I intend on MOVING on completely and not looking back. I have blocked him everywhere and I have no intentions of looking back. With time he began changing and showing his true personality. I recognized we were very different individuals but we had the same goals in life which is honestly the only thing that brought us together in the first place. But to finish off my story, Im very hurt and sometimes I feel like I wont make it through this. I struggle sleeping, eating, im a total DISASTER. Im just looking for some positive thoughts or comments on the situation. Has anyone been through something similar ?. Please share. 1
Author kztar Posted June 20, 2016 Author Posted June 20, 2016 Can someone tell me how to post updates on here? 1
Toodaloo Posted June 20, 2016 Posted June 20, 2016 You post as you did just then... So what is your update? 1
Zahara Posted June 20, 2016 Posted June 20, 2016 Can someone tell me how to post updates on here? Just add to the thread. Did you meet up with the ex? What happened? 1
Author kztar Posted June 20, 2016 Author Posted June 20, 2016 Hi guys, Posted update on the second chances thread. 1
Author kztar Posted June 20, 2016 Author Posted June 20, 2016 You post as you did just then... So what is your update? http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/second-chances/584738-dumper-wants-me-back-but-i-no-longer-care
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