JensDestiny Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 Hi, I have been dating a guy for about 4-5 months and recently discovered that he has erectile dysfunction. He has tried the little blue pills and they do not work for him. We have never been able to have sex; this is something that he has been dealing with for who knows how long. This is still a very new relationship and, to be honest, I am not ready to give up sex for what could potentially be forever. I guess I am really at a crossroads as to what to do with this relationship? Do I stick it out and hope that he gets whatever resolved or do I move on before things get more serious? Frustrated...
CarrieT Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 Hoping an issue like this to be resolved is like hoping an amputee will grow their limb back. You either accept him - flaws and all - for who he is and what he has to offer (or not) or you move on. 4
road Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 Hi, I have been dating a guy for about 4-5 months and recently discovered that he has erectile dysfunction. He has tried the little blue pills and they do not work for him. We have never been able to have sex; this is something that he has been dealing with for who knows how long. This is still a very new relationship and, to be honest, I am not ready to give up sex for what could potentially be forever. I guess I am really at a crossroads as to what to do with this relationship? Do I stick it out and hope that he gets whatever resolved or do I move on before things get more serious? Frustrated... How old are the both of you? His health, weight, fitness, Dr evaluation?
preraph Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 One of my loves had ED and wouldn't even tell me why he wasn't having sex. So at least you know why and aren't left dangling to wonder if you're crazy for thinking you're in a relationship. His ED was caused by some molestation when young that he had not dealt with. Within 10 years, he was married with a child and able to talk about it to me. So I don't know if he saw a psychologist or what, but he worked through it. I think there is more than one ED drug now, so look into that if he hasn't already. Find out if he's able to do it alone or not. Like mine, he would at least try with really drunk kind of short blond girls, I guess because he didn't care or something, but not sure if it was successful. Probably. Sometimes it's about confidence and if someone is important to them, it makes them even more nervous about failing. You might try joint counseling before throwing in the towel too. I know it sucks. Good luck.
red.velvet Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 How important is sex to you? & how open is he about it and about getting help? I once dated a guy with ED, a while ago, he blamed me for not being able to get it up. He didn't accept he had a problem, according to him, it was all me. Had to get out of this relationship.
coolheadal Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 Some me might not be able to with you how is this guy has he always been like this prior to you. If you can't give up SEX then why are you with him. Find another man who doesn't have this issue with you. I don't see why you would put of with this and and live unhappy each day. Doesn't make much sense to put up with it. Move on!
Captivating Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 Hi, Try to be supportive and go with him to his physician who can refer him to a specialist. Sometimes there is a health condition behind this such as high blood pressure. Sometimes it is psychosomatic, "performance anxiety", both of them a treatable. You guys need to find this out regardless. I hope things will work out.
basil67 Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 Hi, I have been dating a guy for about 4-5 months and recently discovered that he has erectile dysfunction. He has tried the little blue pills and they do not work for him. We have never been able to have sex; this is something that he has been dealing with for who knows how long. This is still a very new relationship and, to be honest, I am not ready to give up sex for what could potentially be forever. I guess I am really at a crossroads as to what to do with this relationship? Do I stick it out and hope that he gets whatever resolved or do I move on before things get more serious? Frustrated... Is viagra the only thing he's tried? Echoing the thoughts of another poster, what's his health and fitness like? Has he seen a urologist? Psychologist? There are even 'penis pumps' if nothing else works. There are solutions, but he needs to be pro active
road Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 How important is sex to you? & how open is he about it and about getting help? I once dated a guy with ED, a while ago, he blamed me for not being able to get it up. He didn't accept he had a problem, according to him, it was all me. Had to get out of this relationship. Unless we get some pictures I think I am having to believe him.
SSJROMANCE Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 Don't give up hope. There are various solutions out there that DO work for some men but not for others. So a search on vitamins/herbs that help ED like vitamin E, L-Arginine and many others. Start taking them and double the dose at first. Make sure he consults a doctor first on his plan as it may be unsafe to take certain ones together. Also I might add it may not be that the bill pill doesn't work. It may just be he has another underlying problem that is blocking the blue pill from working. Once he gets that solved the blue pill may start to work. For example perhaps he just doesn't have any libido. The blue pill only works if you still have a libido. Therefore if he gets help with his libido then the blue pill may start doing its job. Good luck.
Lily blue Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 A lot of male sexual enhancement pills sold online has Viagra and Cialis but ingredient will never tell you that. It contains high level of sildenafil or sulfoaildenafil which is same ingredient as Viagra and Cialis and other herbal stuff. It is much cheaper and most works. This will not increase penis size but will give erection and last long. Research online there are tons of information about it from lab testing and Doctors view of this stuff and reviews from real guys who uses. I worked Pharmacy and Doctors office and I asked about it too because my Ex- husband had erectile dysfunction from his diabetes.
Michelle ma Belle Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 How does your partner feel about this? Is this something HE wants to remedy as much as you or has be made peace with it to some extent? Because if he's less motivated to "fix" things you'll be in for a world of pain. YOU can't fit anything and you certainly can't make him want to do something he's not ready or wiling to do for himself. That's a huge waste of your time and energy. Personally, I couldn't live without sex. I was in a sexless marriage for many many years and I'll never again settle for anything less than a healthy and fulfilling sex life with my partner. If sex is still important to you then you have some very hard decisions to make.
SoleMate Posted February 8, 2016 Posted February 8, 2016 Total inability to have sex is something that should be admitted to early on.....you should not have had to wait 4 months. I would have a real concern with the lack of disclosure. 1
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