echoecho37 Posted February 7, 2016 Posted February 7, 2016 I've been in a relationship with my bf for 8 years. We were supposed to get married but it has been cancelled now because family matters, our parent don't like each others. At first all went smooth, his family love me and also respect my family. Both of our family have the same tradition because we are from the same ethnic group in Asia. But then, along with the wedding preparation, there's something with tradition perception that didn't match and his family was intolerant with it. In our tradition, his family have to visit my family for the formal proposal. We have to follow the tradition. They felt offended for something that my family think it's normal to do so and got really mad at my family. In short, all screwed. They cancelled the wedding date at the church that my parent already booked. I have to cancel all the wedding vendors. I was trying to get through it and still dating my boyfriend, but always get hurt when he defends his family and blamed my family for ruining the wedding plan. Things got worse when his mom texted me not to meet him for a while to test our love which I thought it was just an excuse to separate us. My boyfriend rebuked her and I blocked all his family contacts after. Vice versa, my family still approve my bf despite the family issue. They still want us to get married. Now I don't even know when he will marry me, and when I asked him few days ago, he said that he still needs his parent approval otherwise we won't get married. We got into a really big fight, I got anxiety and ended up at the hospital getting an anti-depressant. He doesn't brave enough to marry me due to family issues. My bf is not a type who likes to take a risk. I can understand the tradition, it's kinda different with white ppl culture. We can't live freely, most of us still live with our parent until we get married. But we've been dating for 8 years and I started to think maybe he doesn't love me that much. It's really difficult for me to decide whether I still want to be with him or not because 8 years mean I really depend on him in everything I do. I don't know if I'm strong enough to make a decision. I don't tell my problem to my family, they just know I'm fine with it. And I can't share with my friends, cause for 8 years I only share my problems to my bf. Looking forward to hearing advises in this forums. Thank you
Recommended Posts