ThisisIt606 Posted February 7, 2016 Posted February 7, 2016 This is a really weird situation and I don't quite know how to handle it or just do nothing. So my bf has his fb set so he has to approve pics before they are posted. He didn't always have this. I was there when he changed to the "approve" option a few months ago. He did it b/c he has a older relative that would constantly tag him, comment on EVERYTHING, and post the "x years ago" memory pics of him. He would get very aggravated when she texted, called, fb, etc. because she was so over the top. I've only posted 4 things (over the course of 3 months) with him tagged since he made change having to approve posts. The last pic was us at a professional sports game. I used 2 hashtags one was #TeamName and the other was #TeamSlogan. He didn't accept this, and when I asked him a few days later if he did, he was just like "oh, I don't always get notifications to remind me to accept with this approval setting" and accept it on the spot, was no big deal. About 15 minutes later he gets a text from a friend. Out loud my bf said "Oh ok, great. Thanks *friend's name*" I asked what was that about? He said his friend (who is apparently is the fb police) said #'s are publically searchable. He told bf this since he likes to keep his fb pretty private/unsearchable. Is this odd to you that the friend texted my bf this? I think so, esp considering.. 1) the pic was just us smiling at a sports game. no alchol or anything that could be preceived as "bad" was in the pic 2) we are official. His close friends have met me. 3) The hashtags were not anything ridiculous or excessive. Again, just 2 of them. #TeamName #TeamSlogan. I asked my bf if he wanted me to stop hastaging and said I would and I could delete the hashtags I posted. He said something to the effect of "no, don't, if anything i'll just delete from timeline." He also said his friend just knows he likes to be unsearchable on fb. I also told him a hashtag can't be public unless I set my pic as public (I set my pic as private as with all my phone posts). I know fb is ridiculous, but my question is WHY do you think the firend is so obsessed with my BF's fb? *warning* him about hashtags when nothing embarrassing/bad/negative is going on in the pic? I'm going to cool it on the posts (even though 4 posts over 3 months isn't even a lot to begin with). I just don't want a random friend I don't even know to hate me and try to *spoil* my bf's mind. I DO know his ex #'ed like crazy and used things like #love, #boyfriend # handsome. Which I have never done and never will do because I personally find that embarassing and unnecessary.
dispatch3d Posted February 7, 2016 Posted February 7, 2016 Assuming he is in a professional line of work he probably just doesn't want a huge line of twitter like hash tags on facebook for potential employers to search through (which could happen). I wouldn't analyze it any farther than that and I would definitely be the same as far as letting random people I barely know search my facebook pictures/history/etc. My employer doesn't need to know I'm an Oiler's fan (if I am!). 4
Wewon Posted February 7, 2016 Posted February 7, 2016 Not totally familiar with the specifics of a hashtag, but don't they make things so that they can go into a generalized search? If not, then what's the point of a hashtag?
Author ThisisIt606 Posted February 7, 2016 Author Posted February 7, 2016 Is this friend male or female? The friend is male. I know bc he said a male's name when he said something to the effect of "Oh ok, thanks (name)"
Emilia Posted February 7, 2016 Posted February 7, 2016 I keep fb unsearchable and have helped an ex keep his unsearchable when he had a sensitive job. I am currently looking for a new job so making sure I can be only found on LinkedIn. my profile photo is very rarely me, I have different email addresses for every site, etc. 1
Author ThisisIt606 Posted February 7, 2016 Author Posted February 7, 2016 The job thing makes sense and I can see that. At the same time, I don't want to stifle what I do on social media just because of a friend that feels the need to alert my bf of hashtags... or make my bf anxious/annoyed with tags. I'll prob just still take pics but only post them on my fb book and not tag my bf, which seems weird and annoying... but I guess that's what you get when social media comes into play in a relationship.
Emilia Posted February 7, 2016 Posted February 7, 2016 I have to say social media plays zero part in my dating/relationships. I don't really see why tagging someone matters the slightest bit
Erdbeere Posted February 7, 2016 Posted February 7, 2016 This is a really weird situation and I don't quite know how to handle it or just do nothing. So my bf has his fb set so he has to approve pics before they are posted. He didn't always have this. I was there when he changed to the "approve" option a few months ago. He did it b/c he has a older relative that would constantly tag him, comment on EVERYTHING, and post the "x years ago" memory pics of him. He would get very aggravated when she texted, called, fb, etc. because she was so over the top. I've only posted 4 things (over the course of 3 months) with him tagged since he made change having to approve posts. The last pic was us at a professional sports game. I used 2 hashtags one was #TeamName and the other was #TeamSlogan. He didn't accept this, and when I asked him a few days later if he did, he was just like "oh, I don't always get notifications to remind me to accept with this approval setting" and accept it on the spot, was no big deal. About 15 minutes later he gets a text from a friend. Out loud my bf said "Oh ok, great. Thanks *friend's name*" I asked what was that about? He said his friend (who is apparently is the fb police) said #'s are publically searchable. He told bf this since he likes to keep his fb pretty private/unsearchable. Is this odd to you that the friend texted my bf this? I think so, esp considering.. 1) the pic was just us smiling at a sports game. no alchol or anything that could be preceived as "bad" was in the pic 2) we are official. His close friends have met me. 3) The hashtags were not anything ridiculous or excessive. Again, just 2 of them. #TeamName #TeamSlogan. I asked my bf if he wanted me to stop hastaging and said I would and I could delete the hashtags I posted. He said something to the effect of "no, don't, if anything i'll just delete from timeline." He also said his friend just knows he likes to be unsearchable on fb. I also told him a hashtag can't be public unless I set my pic as public (I set my pic as private as with all my phone posts). I know fb is ridiculous, but my question is WHY do you think the firend is so obsessed with my BF's fb? *warning* him about hashtags when nothing embarrassing/bad/negative is going on in the pic? I'm going to cool it on the posts (even though 4 posts over 3 months isn't even a lot to begin with). I just don't want a random friend I don't even know to hate me and try to *spoil* my bf's mind. I DO know his ex #'ed like crazy and used things like #love, #boyfriend # handsome. Which I have never done and never will do because I personally find that embarassing and unnecessary. I wouldn't use hashtags at all. I'd also ask him if he wants you to share a particular pic or not, rather than just automatically including him. He is right to be worried about security and privacy. 3
basil67 Posted February 7, 2016 Posted February 7, 2016 If your boyfriend has the same reaction with anybody tagging him, then it's not about you and what you post. This is just about his own preferences. And while a post may be private when he approves it, these settings can be changed. If tagging him is more important to you, drop the hashtags. If hashtags are important to you, then don't tag him. 1
Recommended Posts