Lily1234 Posted February 6, 2016 Posted February 6, 2016 (edited) This is what I posted about this guy last time. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/567385-stay-together-everyday-after-first-meet To be brief, we are both undergrad, I knew him at school and he invited me to a party and we slept together that night. Since then he started to ask me to go study with him almost everyday. But now things started to be more and more confused. Actually I didn't feel he really likes me even though he wants to meet at school everyday. He always wanted me to help him with Math or something, which makes me feel like a tutor. And there was a time that he wanted to sleep over, but he didn't ask me. He said "I want stay by campus tonight so I can go study earlier tomorrow". When I asked him are you indicating sleep over he said he'd love to. I really don't like the feeling that he always says things indirectly and pushes me to say it. This happened so many times that he always says things indirectly and then waits me to offer it. And I thought he is the one more likes physical contact, he always gives sign to cuddle or kiss goodbye. But one day night he texted me and said he felt too shy to kiss me in public, which really surprised me! There is no sign to indicate that he is shy, and I know he used to have a lot fun or date girls frequently. He was a typical party animal in freshman but started to work hard since he is a senior now. Sometime he introduced me to his friends but still I feel like he doesn't want people know we stay together. Am I overthinking? Is he treated me as a "friend with benefit" or is he just shy? I'm so confused why he wants to stay together everyday if he does't take it seriously. Edited February 6, 2016 by Lily1234 change details
WhatYouWantToHear Posted February 6, 2016 Posted February 6, 2016 Am I overthinking? I think your under acting on it. You need to tell him exactly what you posted--that you unsure of what type of relationship you guys are in and would him to clarify it. Also, you need to call him on his passive-aggressive imposing on you. Don't let him manipulate you into inviting him to stay--tell him that if he wants to spend the night to come right out and ask. Lastly, let him know what type of relationship(s) you are open to. If you want to be boyfriend/girlfriend, tell him. If fwb is ok with you, let him know that. 1
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