Author Stapleton Posted February 5, 2016 Author Posted February 5, 2016 Ppretty funny! I'm sure my boyfreind would also lose his job when they saw what he responded with. That wouldn't be so funny.
Gaeta Posted February 5, 2016 Posted February 5, 2016 We have lived together for almost three years now. Ok so, there is no walking on eggshells here. You have a solid relationship and this is beyond what a girlfriend should tolerate from a boyfriend. 1
kendahke Posted February 5, 2016 Posted February 5, 2016 (edited) The problem isn't her. The problem is that your boyfriend responded positively to her text and reciprocated. This should have been shut down the first time she sent something. It wasn't. He engaged her and encouraged her through his replies. The other problem is that you don't actually have transparency in your relationship if you can't tell him that you looked through his phone and saw this. If right is so on your side, you should fear nothing and no one or their reaction. That you aren't talking to anyone like this is non sequitur. He already knows that you have access to his phone, so in truth, what does he have to hide from you that you already have access to? If he hadn't changed the passcode before now, that means he's thinking what he's been saying isn't serious enough to hide it from someone who already has access to his phone. Tell you what--tonight, ask him for his phone and see how long it takes for him to give it to you or what he says to not give it to you. His behavior will tell you all you need to know. I guess I don't want him to know I read them because I don't want him to block me from his phone. This is called being deceitful. Actually, no. You tell him what you read and you tell him you expect for the transparency policy to remain in effect in your relationship or you're out of there. THAT is dealing with the issue with transparency and integrity, not deceit. And you don't proceed in a relationship without having the means to make good on that. You should never be at the mercy of any man for a place to lay your head at night. Your relationship obviously has some problems if 1. he's doing this and 2. your answer to dealing with it is to be deceitful. That makes you no better than him. Edited February 5, 2016 by kendahke
Toodaloo Posted February 5, 2016 Posted February 5, 2016 My boyfriend is in a powerful position at work. Recently they merged two companies together. A woman that now works with him has been texting him sex cartoons. The first one showed three nurses and talked about them having sex with a corpse, the second about waterboarding a mans ball sack. After recieving these he replied "funny". Then he proceeded to send her one that said "it's smack a dumb coworker day" and she responded "your first in line". The second to last cartoon said something about anal sex wasn't a loophole to virginity, to which my boyfriend responded "yeah but it feels good" then she said "LMAO didn't know you were the ****ty dick type" The last cartoon she sent said "every lady knows that man that thinks he's gods gift to women, but when he comes near you your clit climbs inside your womb" WTH? Anyhow he did not respond at all after that until the next week. He sent her at text that said "GET YOUR ASS TO WORK" She obvioulsy has some motive.. I am assuming it is to be with him. I am not so much mad at him (kinda for even responding to her). Mostly I want to stop her. She also requested his freindship on facebook, so they are now "friends". We have been together three years and live together, i'm madly in love and he treats me like a queen. Texts me many times through the day, sometimes all day long telling me he loves me and our weekends together are always perfect. I don't think he is interested in her, he's just stupid. But I still need advice on how to go forward. BTW he doesn't know I saw any of this and I'm not about to let him know. This sounds like the sort of conversations I have with my bosses. Trust me there is NO real flirting going on there!!! Your boyfriend is only interested in you. Tell the crazy lady within you to get a grip and be cool. Don't let him know but if it does come up be very relaxed about it - ask him to send it to you so you can send it to one of your friends to make them laugh. 2
Remington Posted February 5, 2016 Posted February 5, 2016 This situation is not appealing to any of the parties involved. Every player and playee is or is to be disappointed. It's just what it is. The very nucleus of life. Being here isn't easy. Nor is being alive. Or being human and all civilized. Being loved isn't easy and being vulnerable is very hard. Being desired is the same as being ****ed. And getting up after you're ****ed up. That's not easy either. Don't want to sound discouraging but you might just wanna get on with your life.
Gaeta Posted February 5, 2016 Posted February 5, 2016 This sounds like the sort of conversations I have with my bosses. Trust me there is NO real flirting going on there!!! You have had those conversation privately on text? with your married bosses?
katiegrl Posted February 5, 2016 Posted February 5, 2016 If it was the opposite, a man sending these dirty sex jokes to a woman, he'd be hit with a sexual harassment charge in a split second. This is highly inappropriate at work, and in your relationship. On top of that he is in a position of authority !! I would not tolerate it. Not that I think they're being sneaky or anything but because it's just an ugly and disrespectful thing to do when someone is in a relationship Since he is in a position of authority...and HE is responding...he could STILL be hit with a sex harassment lawsuit! Which may very well be her plan. Easy settlement. Slam dunk actually since she's got the emails to prove it. She's initiating but he's responding....which implies he's encouraging it. I work in the legal field (employment law) and we see this all the time. 2
dreamingoftigers Posted February 5, 2016 Posted February 5, 2016 I'd be more concerned with him getting a sexual harassment charge than cheating in this instance. Just seems like inappropriate work humor, not interest in the other person sexually. I would freak. I would probably laugh but point out the concern.
dreamingoftigers Posted February 5, 2016 Posted February 5, 2016 I find it more immature than offensive or cheaterish.
Recommended Posts