EternallyDistant Posted February 3, 2016 Posted February 3, 2016 Firstly, I'm sorry if this comes across as strange... But I want to tell you all a little story, and I'm hoping you'll read and then be kind enough to give me a little advice. I'd really appreciate it. This all started the night my dad remarried. I was 16 at the time, and I had been drinking quite a bit that day as my dad had an open tab and told me and my brother that we could have what we wanted. By three o'clock I was already quite drunk because I was a bridesmaid, and had been drinking champagne while getting ready that morning. This guy, who I had never really thought much of before was helping me... He bought me food, and kept bringing me water in an attempt to sober me up slightly so that I would be ready for the dinner. I thanked him, and we ended up talking a fair amount. He was a lot nicer than I thought he was... Later that evening, after all the festivities of a wedding had already taken place, I was once again quite drunk. I had decided that I wanted to go back up to my room to have a cigarette, so in my drunken state I stumbled outside and headed towards the main building, when I once again ran into the guy who I'm pretty sure was also quite drunk at that stage. I told him I was going to my room, and he refused to let me go alone, which I was annoyed about because no one knew I smoked and I didn't want him to find out. He walked my upstairs to my room which I happened to be sharing with his sister. I have up on tying to hide my smoking and told him I wanted a cigarette, which he was surprised about, but wasn't all that shocked as he smoked too. We smoked together, leaning out the window of the building, and once again ended up chatting as if we had always been great friends... And then he got up to go to the bathroom. Tired, and not used to the sensation of being drunk, I climbed onto my bed, and I'm not even sure how it happened, but he ended up practically on top of me, with his hand on my boob, and something shifted inside of me and I suddenly wanted him to kiss me, and I'm pretty sure he was about to, but he had a girlfriend, had just become my step-cousin thing... And his sister opened the door to the room, and freaked out. The rest of the night was pretty confusing... Ever since that night, I can't stop thinking about him or about what would've happened if we had locked the door. I'm 17 now, and I've been though it all in my mind. I've felt used, and confused, but mostly regret.. for not just going for it. We've been talking consistently ever since, but it's never come up. I'm not sure if he even remembers, or if he does and just thinks that I don't remember.. Or maybe it was all just a misunderstanding on my part, but the way he was acting and the things he said make me think otherwise. Part of me wants to bring it up. To act upon how I feel, because I like him.. quite a lot. But we're technically family and that complicates things... And he's also a good bit older, which complicates it more... I just can't figure out if I should just go with my gut and act on it.. Or keep quiet in order to avoid trouble...
d0nnivain Posted February 3, 2016 Posted February 3, 2016 There are no laws against step-cousins dating. the prohibition when it exists is about blood relatives, which you are not. There are however laws against 16 year olds drinking & smoking. So cut back on the booze & the cigarettes. You are just a kid, even if you are 17 now. (sorry but I'm more than old enough to be your mom so I can't let those things slide) it's been a year since all of this happened. Even though you talk, he's never brought it up or asked you out. That alone tells me he's not as interested in you as you are in him. Sorry.
GunslingerRoland Posted February 3, 2016 Posted February 3, 2016 It's not legally wrong, and considering that you guys are already almost adults meeting I don't really think it's morally wrong either. However, it sounds like your family is pretty close. So what happens if you have a relationship with him and it goes bad? Do you really want to see your ex at every family event for the rest of your life? My advice, keep it in your pants! There are lots of attractive young men in the world, find a different one! 1
sandylee1 Posted February 3, 2016 Posted February 3, 2016 There's no blood between you. ..but it doesn't sound like he's interested. Alcohol to the point you have difficulty controlling what's going on is really dangerous. Don't drink to that point unless you are with trusted people who aren't drinking so much as well. You could end up getting raped. ..pregnant or with an STD. I don't mean to lecture you. ...but be careful. You're pretty much my daughters age and I'd be horrified if this happened to her.
Author EternallyDistant Posted February 4, 2016 Author Posted February 4, 2016 I haven't gotten that drunk since, in fact I've barely gotten drunk at all since. It was just a weird day for me so I decided to get drunk to make it more bearable. And I know I shouldn't smoke, but... Yeah... There has been flirting back and forth between us. Mostly innocent, but I know he's probably not interested. I guess these posts helped that to sink in, and I'm not gonna lie, I'm a little disappointed... But you're probably right. I think I'm just looking too much into things 1
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