Mjm1014 Posted February 2, 2016 Posted February 2, 2016 I'm 28 years old, and am getting to the point in my life I'm really looking for something long term that will "stick." I need some opinions as to whether I should pursue this next relationship or not... Long story short, I had the biggest crush on a girl about 10 years ago when we were taking a college course together, but was in a relationship at the time so I didn't persue...for years I always wondered "what if" and I honestly have never been so attracted to someone. We both liked eachother but we're in relationships at the time. A few weeks ago, I randomly got a friend request from her over Facebook, and we've been texting ever since, and even talk on the phone almost every night. We both want eachother so bad, but the problem is she lives on the other side of the country now, and I'm about to start my new job in a completely new city in a few weeks. For my particular field, working out of her city isn't an option, and she still has another year or two of school there. Basically her and I are unsure if we will ever be in the same city again. Do you think it's stupid to get too attached when things are so complicated? Like I said, I had the biggest crush on her, but the situation sucks, and we seem crazy about eachother-remember it's been 10 years since we met and saw eachother. I feel like that alone is enough to "try" like maybe it's meant to be, but the other part of me thinks there is no way it would work:/
red.velvet Posted February 2, 2016 Posted February 2, 2016 I'd say meet up, see if the spark is still there. I wouldn't dismiss her yet. I've seen a couple work, and they lived continents apart. Since it was worth it, they did the long distance for two years, they'd visit eachother for a month twice a year, and then the lady moved to the guy's country, into his house and now they are living happily ever after. It's hard to meet people you like, are attracted to and connect with and it sucks sometimes that people give up so fast and so easily. If something is worth it, you work for it. I think it's how it should be. 1
Zippy2000 Posted February 2, 2016 Posted February 2, 2016 A few weeks ago, I randomly got a friend request from her over Facebook, and we've been texting ever since, and even talk on the phone almost every night. We both want eachother so bad, but the problem is she lives on the other side of the country now, and I'm about to start my new job in a completely new city in a few weeks. For my particular field, working out of her city isn't an option, and she still has another year or two of school there. Basically her and I are unsure if we will ever be in the same city again. Do you think it's stupid to get too attached when things are so complicated? Like I said, I had the biggest crush on her, but the situation sucks, and we seem crazy about eachother-remember it's been 10 years since we met and saw eachother. I feel like that alone is enough to "try" like maybe it's meant to be, but the other part of me thinks there is no way it would work:/ Nothing wrong with exploring an option. However is depends what you mean by the other end of the country. If youre in the States then thats a massive gap. If its the UK then its more practical. Long distance relations do and can work. I have 2 colleauges from work. Im from the UK and one of them is married to a South African and anotehr one across the Atlandtic from Florida, America. If you find out if this will work then ask her what her opinion is. Ten years ago is along time and she may have changed and see you as a friend. Ask and you shall find out.
Gaeta Posted February 2, 2016 Posted February 2, 2016 How far apart are you? Can you afford traveling back and forth? Start by visiting and spending some time together then decide if you want to pursue or not. In 2 years when she graduate you can both move to a city of your choice to be together.
d0nnivain Posted February 2, 2016 Posted February 2, 2016 Just because you can't work where she is currently going to school, doesn't mean much. Once she gets a job, don't you anticipate she will relocate? For now enjoy the flirtation & the excitement but keep it light . . . no exclusivity. Figure out a way one of you can travel to the other for a long weekend or so. Spend some time together. Date casually & keep in touch over the computer etc. but keep your options open. As she nears graduation & whatever is next for her, see if you can close the distance. If you can, great. If you can't, don't bother continuing.
Ami1uwant Posted February 2, 2016 Posted February 2, 2016 Plan on meeting g her and see what happens...if you don't 10 yrs from now you will regret it even more. A big issue yo address is what Re her career goals? Where does she want to live? In your field how many places can you work??? Is there a 3rd option you could agree on trying g to live yogether at?
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