Speika Posted January 31, 2016 Posted January 31, 2016 Basically this part two: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/555377-messing-me-around-more Insight into whether I made the right decision and what the point of her text was appreciated. So she got back in touch with me and we began seeing each other again on a non serious basis. After the way things had ended before and she'd treated me I didn't want anything serious with her however couldn't deny the fact that I really liked her and enjoyed spending time with her. Every now and then she would make comments still as if she was after something serious or saw some kind of future with us which I ignored as she'd done that before and apparently not entirely meant it and she was the one that had said she wasn't in a place for anything serious. Things were nice though the fact that I like her more than I should have for something less than serious was always on my mind. I wasn't really looking for anyone else as I was happy to be seeing her though the fact that it was by definition going nowhere and the possibility of her meeting someone played on my mind as much as I tried to tell myself it didn't bother me. We met for the last time just before Christmas and agreed to meet the next week. I came away from it however feeling more than ever that it was a bad idea and the whole thing was generally stressing me out. I contacted her just before christmas, on christmas day and new years day. None of which were ignored and led to conversations though all of which were initiated by me. I largely wanted to see if she would contact me and the fact that she didn't reinforced my belief that us seeing each other in any way was not worth it. We never met up the next week as I never brought it up and neither did she. I didn't contact her again as I felt if she did want to see me there was no reason she couldn't contact me. Especially as it had been me that had contacted her the last few times. I was feeling fine about it until I got a text from her a week ago. In short it went along the lines of - "haven't heard anything from you since christmas but I've been really busy and I've got another test coming up so I'll be busy for a bit still". I replied wishing her luck on her exam and told her not to worry and let me know. She didn't reply to that and I haven't heard from her since. Since then I've been going back to the point of thinking about her all the time and regretting not getting together with her again. Does it sound like I made the right decision here? I feel like it definitely is but at the same time the fact that she's all I think about really clouds my judgement. I could have possibly let her know that I didn't want to continue but a part of me wanted to leave the door open and see if she'd reach out to me. Also what her text to me meant baffles me. Insight into that would be a bonus. It's like she's making excuses for us not meeting up and sort of sounds like an excuse for why she can't meet up in the future. Though why she mentioned me not contacting her before that doesn't make sense. If she didn't want to see me she could have just not contacted me. I know I'm probably over analysing things here but I can't help it. Not reaching out to her is a constant battle.
Versacehottie Posted January 31, 2016 Posted January 31, 2016 Yes you did the right thing. That she didn't answer your last text at all shows that she is barely invested. She is stringing you along. Ball is 100% in her court. Let her make next contact/move and proceed with extreme caution if you do end up going out. Good luck
Author Speika Posted February 1, 2016 Author Posted February 1, 2016 Thanks. Yeah that's basically what I thought. She did still feel very affectionate for the most part when we were together though the fact that it was mostly me texting her after the last date with little attempt from her to contact me probably says it all. I still don't really understand what the point of her texting me last week was though or what it meant?
Versacehottie Posted February 1, 2016 Posted February 1, 2016 Thanks. Yeah that's basically what I thought. She did still feel very affectionate for the most part when we were together though the fact that it was mostly me texting her after the last date with little attempt from her to contact me probably says it all. I still don't really understand what the point of her texting me last week was though or what it meant? Sometimes this kind of person who strings people along has good intentions for a second or two, then go back to being flakey, not ready and effectively have misled you about their priorities. Shoot you aren't even asking to be number one but this is too much (her behavior/time frames!). Major string along. The other and most common reason they do it is because they crave the attention and want you on the back burner for either the attention or for real. They can be emotional people too, especially in the girl version, so one moment she thinks "what happened to Speika he made me feel really good about myself and I think I like him because he hasn't been paying any attention to me"--then they switch gears again. It's not about you--it's an insatiable need for ego boosts wherever they can get them. With little regard to dragging another human into their sh*t. good luck
Author Speika Posted February 1, 2016 Author Posted February 1, 2016 Sometimes this kind of person who strings people along has good intentions for a second or two, then go back to being flakey, not ready and effectively have misled you about their priorities. Shoot you aren't even asking to be number one but this is too much (her behavior/time frames!). Major string along. The other and most common reason they do it is because they crave the attention and want you on the back burner for either the attention or for real. They can be emotional people too, especially in the girl version, so one moment she thinks "what happened to Speika he made me feel really good about myself and I think I like him because he hasn't been paying any attention to me"--then they switch gears again. It's not about you--it's an insatiable need for ego boosts wherever they can get them. With little regard to dragging another human into their sh*t. good luck Ok thanks for that. I'm gonna presume based on the lack of responses that this is a pretty obvious one and I'm perhaps being a bit blind.
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