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When a woman says "women hate me".


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Posted (edited)
Anytime I've heard that (I'm a woman) it's been because the woman has no loyalty or boundaries with other women and will have no conscience about moving in on their men, so they dump her and she ends up with only male companions. She tells herself it's jealousy, but like a severe narcissist or sociopath, she is the one lacking in empathy. She is likely to only feel sorry for herself.

 

This matches the woman I immediately think of when this kind of thing comes up. I knew her in college.

 

her "I'm going to hang out with the guys because they're less drama."

 

Myself and the rest of the guys notice way more drama immediately. The women tell us they have way less drama right away. Everyone put the pieces together.

Edited by JustGettingBy
fixed spelling
Posted
People hate others that have ugly character flaws. Women don't hate other women because they are pretty and successful.

 

If a pretty woman told me women hate her I'd right away think she is a B deep down, and she is just not aware of her abrasive personality.

 

I would also view it as she is blowing her own horn. It's just not something you wanna hear out of woman's mouth.

 

At least true for me. I don't hate anybody because of their beauties and success if they have good characters.

 

but probably not true for ALL people though...

Posted

One of my co-workers said outright, I dont have any female friends, I am too popular with men, they are all jealous of me.

 

I didnt say anything but my immediate thought was, no, you're just a B i t c h.

  • Like 1
Posted
In my experience, telling other people that "women hate me" is usually a kind of humblebrag where the woman saying it is implying that they are all jealous of her. I think a woman saying that is a red flag because what is her motivation for doing so? To get attention and intrigue. If it's true it's not a good thing either.

 

Bingo. on the humblebrag. And if it's true, and there's usually some truth to it, bad judgement to advertise it!!!

 

The majority girls have no problem being friends with girls who have envy-producing qualities, like being pretty---if they are nice, friendly enough, sometimes even when they aren't as much. To make it into the "women hate me" category is really bad. Every girl I know that has ever made it into that category definitely deserved it--due to character flaws. I have tons of envy-producing and well-loved gorgeous girlfriends; they are girls girls; some are even guys girls. The girl that is hated by women is usually the one that will backstab any girl, even a close friend, to get what she wants. There's a consequence for that.

Posted

"I don't know why, I just get along so much better with guys than I do girls!"

 

"I have way more guys friends than girlfriends, just because guys are easier to get along with".

 

"Girls are so dramatic.. I don't know why but most of the girls I meet just are cold and bitchy towards me"

 

 

When you hear those things.. The girl saying it...... Is never a virgin lol, she can usually drink or bartends at some point in her life, tells you that the guys she chills with are just like older brothers, but if you asked them truthfully, each and every one of them wants to or would have sex with her if she gave them the slightest opening.

Posted (edited)

I work in a female dominated industry, there's enough oestrogen in my daily workplace to supply a fertility clinic. Here's what I notice, watching women interact with each other.

 

- Women without typically female interests and quiet personalities get sledged a lot. There is nothing even slightly narcissistic nor untoward about them. These are generally quite sweet natured people but they are not gregarious and get lost in the sea of personalities I work with. Most of the time these women tend to focus on tasks at hand as a way to cope with being overwhelmed and they are routinely criticised for that too. It seems that their interest in their work and lack of interest in the most attention seeking female in the workplace is enough to warrant severe judgement.

 

- Women judge each other mercilessly, the younger they are, the more likely they are to ostracise anyone who does not equate to their personal experience. I will work with a certain person one day and hear the most horrendous backstabbing about them the next coming out of the mouth of some random. I routinely here snide comments about such and such's personal interests merely because it's different to whoever's doing the backstabbing. What I personally know of these people does not warrant the discussions I over hear.

 

- Cliques don't just happen in high school they continue on in workplaces and other adult interests too. From what I've seen an awful lot of women do not mature past a certain age and are more than happy to continue on a high school mentality in corporate environments.

 

- Personal hatreds seem to bear little resemblance to reality or any kind of objectivity. I routinely see women hate each other for no real reason other than a personality clash or differing interests.

 

I work in a very large pool of women of various ages. My rotation within different groups is very high. Much higher than most people experience within regular corporate environments. I no longer buy into the kind of sentiments littered in this thread as a result of my exposure to a great number of different women. My experience is that most of the time, people are unfairly judged, ostracised and avoided with very little provocation. What I witness is a hell of a lot of knee-jerking and snap judgements without regard to the true content of someone's character. Some of the most two-faced individuals I know are highly popular and universally liked while many genuine people I know are maligned. Which is why I'm not likely to pay credence to a lot of this well.....well if someone complains of maltreatment then they must be the one with the issue.

 

I've witnessed far too much of the opposite to really buy into it now and charisma ranks higher socially than integrity. I know some very morally suspect individuals who can work it like no other. I think it's a very great mistake to think that social skills or finesse in that regard makes someone a good person.

Edited by Buddhist
  • Like 8
Posted
Bingo. on the humblebrag. And if it's true, and there's usually some truth to it, bad judgement to advertise it!!!

 

The majority girls have no problem being friends with girls who have envy-producing qualities, like being pretty---if they are nice, friendly enough, sometimes even when they aren't as much. To make it into the "women hate me" category is really bad. Every girl I know that has ever made it into that category definitely deserved it--due to character flaws. I have tons of envy-producing and well-loved gorgeous girlfriends; they are girls girls; some are even guys girls. The girl that is hated by women is usually the one that will backstab any girl, even a close friend, to get what she wants. There's a consequence for that.

 

This isn't always true. Although I haven't been hated by ALL women, I've been through periods of life in which I have had trouble with girls in school, or women in my family. The family issue surprised the hell out of me, because they turned against me for a bridezilla who incorrectly decided that I was jealous of her, so she was allowed to bully me as she pleased. I had all sorts of rubbish spread about me, and it's been the worst part of my adult life - not only hurting me, which I thought was *really* selfish.

 

It all depends on the person and the circumstances. I've also known a few who thought that all women hated them, because they were gorgeous, or for some other reason, and they were actually wrong. Once you've been bullied, it can be easy to assume that it will always happen, and you can be on the defensive when it isn't necessary.

Posted

I've never said out loud that women hate me but I don't get along well with most women. I am in a male dominated industry and am VERY logical so I don't understand the high pitched screams, cattiness, and similar stuff that I see so many women do. I tend to make friends with women who are drawn to the sciences, engineering, military, etc. I have learned I just don't fit well into a typical women's group. I also do very well with finding male friends and many of them have laughed when I have recounted my experiences with women and agreed.

Posted
I've never said out loud that women hate me but I don't get along well with most women.

 

Better watch out - if you ever utter those words than you'll officially be an evil, conniving b***h. :p;)

  • Like 1
Posted
Better watch out - if you ever utter those words than you'll officially be an evil, conniving b***h. :p;)

 

This thread alone is an example of how quickly and with little provocation strong feelings bubble to surface.

 

I hope it gives good women pause....there is something to it and it's a damb shame.

 

100% Right on Buddhist....I've seen it too many times to count. Enough already.

  • Like 4
Posted
I've never said out loud that women hate me but I don't get along well with most women. I am in a male dominated industry and am VERY logical so I don't understand the high pitched screams, cattiness, and similar stuff that I see so many women do. I tend to make friends with women who are drawn to the sciences, engineering, military, etc. I have learned I just don't fit well into a typical women's group. I also do very well with finding male friends and many of them have laughed when I have recounted my experiences with women and agreed.

 

Men can be just as catty. You haven't noticed that? Bridezilla I mentioned before was spurred on by her husband - about whom I have nothing good to say.

Posted

Almost none of the women I know who say women hate them are exceedingly gorgeous, smart, successful, or intimidating. They just THINK they are exceedingly gorgeous, smart, successful, or intimidating. What is really going on is that they are tactless, arrogant, condescending, unfeminine, and think they know it all.

 

Normal women don't like that.

  • Like 1
Posted
I work in a female dominated industry, there's enough oestrogen in my daily workplace to supply a fertility clinic. Here's what I notice, watching women interact with each other.

 

- Women without typically female interests and quiet personalities get sledged a lot. There is nothing even slightly narcissistic nor untoward about them. These are generally quite sweet natured people but they are not gregarious and get lost in the sea of personalities I work with. Most of the time these women tend to focus on tasks at hand as a way to cope with being overwhelmed and they are routinely criticised for that too. It seems that their interest in their work and lack of interest in the most attention seeking female in the workplace is enough to warrant severe judgement.

 

- Women judge each other mercilessly, the younger they are, the more likely they are to ostracise anyone who does not equate to their personal experience. I will work with a certain person one day and hear the most horrendous backstabbing about them the next coming out of the mouth of some random. I routinely here snide comments about such and such's personal interests merely because it's different to whoever's doing the backstabbing. What I personally know of these people does not warrant the discussions I over hear.

 

- Cliques don't just happen in high school they continue on in workplaces and other adult interests too. From what I've seen an awful lot of women do not mature past a certain age and are more than happy to continue on a high school mentality in corporate environments.

 

- Personal hatreds seem to bear little resemblance to reality or any kind of objectivity. I routinely see women hate each other for no real reason other than a personality clash or differing interests.

 

I work in a very large pool of women of various ages. My rotation within different groups is very high. Much higher than most people experience within regular corporate environments. I no longer buy into the kind of sentiments littered in this thread as a result of my exposure to a great number of different women. My experience is that most of the time, people are unfairly judged, ostracised and avoided with very little provocation. What I witness is a hell of a lot of knee-jerking and snap judgements without regard to the true content of someone's character. Some of the most two-faced individuals I know are highly popular and universally liked while many genuine people I know are maligned. Which is why I'm not likely to pay credence to a lot of this well.....well if someone complains of maltreatment then they must be the one with the issue.

 

I've witnessed far too much of the opposite to really buy into it now and charisma ranks higher socially than integrity. I know some very morally suspect individuals who can work it like no other. I think it's a very great mistake to think that social skills or finesse in that regard makes someone a good person.

 

Idk, I know a few women who are like the ones you describe (genuine but lack the traditional female interests), and they can usually be seen with other women of the same description, and most of them get along with each other great.

Posted
A buddy of mine told me that whenever a woman says "women hate me", she is trying to imply that they're all jealous, hence why they hate her.

 

Is this true?

 

Well, no woman has ever said that to me, but if she did, I guess I would ask, "What do you mean?" That's the only way to know, and even then...

Posted
Idk, I know a few women who are like the ones you describe (genuine but lack the traditional female interests), and they can usually be seen with other women of the same description, and most of them get along with each other great.

 

So you know a few? Do you know over 2,000 women like I do? Your few women who hang out with each other don't exhibit the larger dynamics that mixed groups of people do. Sure they hang out with each other, but how are they treated by women who are not like them? That's the point I was making.

 

Being an introverted female with non-female interests I can assure you life isn't peaches and cream for me when it comes to dealing with the vast majority of women. Sure I get on great with other women like me, who represent approximately 2% of the entire female population.

 

That means the other 98% of them are a real mixed bag for me. Very few extroverted, females with gregarious social natures really take a shine to me. It's not because I'm a bitch or sociopathic, or unfeminine or any of that crap being projected in this thread. It's because we don't share common interests and have vastly different interaction styles. Being in that 2% it's not like I meet similar minds every day of the week.

 

For an example, I love to renovate antique furniture for a hobby. I'm a decent upholsterer, taught myself french polishing, can handpaint decoration in a chinoiserie style. Most of the women I work with would have no idea what most of those words mean and when I attempt to explain the eyes glaze over as they reach for another gossip mag and prepare to ignore me. Does loving antiques, interior decorating and researching traditional methods of woodwork finishing make me a bitch? I mean, really?

 

I get laughed at for taking home discarded paper cups for using as seedling trays. OMG....I like gardening. Shoot me now for being devious and underhanded. I know plenty of men however who are keenly interested in gardening, permaculture, working the land, hobby farming to chat to though. They even think my business idea's are pretty interesting and don't mind a chat.

  • Like 2
Posted (edited)

If women are truly hating you, you maybe getting their back up? A woman told me once getting a compliment from another woman means is a big thing and says a lot about you.

 

I can understand women hating when it involes going after the same guy-that's natural and territorial. Otherwise one should feel she can be just as nice as any other flower out there and feel ok enough to not feel the hate.

 

These women who hate on your friend-surely she has a inkling as to why...if she does not, maybe she's insecure/low self esteem. These feelings maybe due to a particular incident. You need to delve in and find out more.

 

Everythings stems from something.

Edited by shadyp
Typo
Posted
What is really going on is that they are tactless, arrogant, condescending, unfeminine, and think they know it all.

 

Normal women don't like that.

 

Interesting that you throw "unfeminine" in with a whole lot of really negative personality traits. I just don't even know where to go with that.

  • Like 1
Posted

There is one woman I know who is hated by all the other women in our social circle- she has never acknowledged that she is hated- maybe she's unaware or just doesn't care what other women think of her? The reason why? She refuses to socialise with any woman and she waits until the boyfriends/husbands are alone and invites herself to join them.

Sure the guys love her- she's an easy Lay. Why wouldn't they?

No one is jealous of her, we just detest her loose morals and disrespect for the sisterhood.

  • Like 1
Posted
I've never said out loud that women hate me but I don't get along well with most women. I am in a male dominated industry and am VERY logical so I don't understand the high pitched screams, cattiness, and similar stuff that I see so many women do. I tend to make friends with women who are drawn to the sciences, engineering, military, etc. I have learned I just don't fit well into a typical women's group. I also do very well with finding male friends and many of them have laughed when I have recounted my experiences with women and agreed.

 

This is what I'm accustomed to hearing. "I don't get along well with other women because they're just so catty/petty/dramatic/ditzy/annoying/[other negative stereotype] and I'm just so different!" I don't know... maybe I've just been blessed with good girlfriends, but I don't associate these negative traits with women on the whole.

Posted
Interesting that you throw "unfeminine" in with a whole lot of really negative personality traits. I just don't even know where to go with that.

 

I should clarify: I mean women who demean the idea of feminity. Feminity can mean many things, from pearls to Rosie the Riveter to felling trees in the woods.

 

A woman who is anti-feminine is one who seems to go to great lengths to avoid being a woman, so to speak. They bash women with the bitterest of men in some odd attempt to be "one of the guys." These women are typically unmarried but have no problem bashing wives and childless but with no shortage of opinions on how children should be raised.

Posted
This is what I'm accustomed to hearing. "I don't get along well with other women because they're just so catty/petty/dramatic/ditzy/annoying/[other negative stereotype] and I'm just so different!" I don't know... maybe I've just been blessed with good girlfriends, but I don't associate these negative traits with women on the whole.

 

The reason you do not encounter this is because you are NOT this.

Posted

And Peaches is! I knew it! :p

Posted

yes some not all women are jealous creatures. women can be very competitive. It's usually directed at someone that is not part of their inner circle of hens. I have experienced this hate, been called a slut, easy, can't be trusted by women I hardly even know....I am so far from being a slut or even dress like one. it's like they see me and think they have me all figured out just by my looks. It has always bewildered me why they would say such things when I'm not even like that.

Posted
yes some not all women are jealous creatures. women can be very competitive. It's usually directed at someone that is not part of their inner circle of hens. I have experienced this hate, been called a slut, easy, can't be trusted by women I hardly even know....I am so far from being a slut or even dress like one. it's like they see me and think they have me all figured out just by my looks. It has always bewildered me why they would say such things when I'm not even like that.

 

Women are catty by nature. The women who are not jealous are the ones who are pretty and get all the attention in the world. It's the one friend in the group who isn't the prettiest who is secretly jealous and privately wishes for the pretty girlfriend to fall on her face.

 

Why women call you a slut, Smackie? Obviously, they see you as a threat.

Posted
Women are catty by nature. The women who are not jealous are the ones who are pretty and get all the attention in the world. It's the one friend in the group who isn't the prettiest who is secretly jealous and privately wishes for the pretty girlfriend to fall on her face.

 

Why women call you a slut, Smackie? Obviously, they see you as a threat.

 

This is one of the most ridiculous things I have ever heard. I was definitely not "the pretty friend," and I have never felt that catty jealousy. I have friends who fall all over the spectrum of stereotypical beauty, and I love them all.

 

People who have this view of women (especially other women) make me sad.

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