Me and my long distance gf broke up and since we became friends we are only fighting

[AndrewFrost]

- It took me a while to reach help because I thought I'd be able to deal with it my way but I seriously don't know what to do. Here's our story. -

 

SHORT INTRO

My girlfriend broke up with me after being in a long distance relationship for about 3 months, it may not sound much but in that time we both spend chatting on skype and calling each other we felt a bond that was truly unique.

 

HOW WE BECAME A COUPLE

I met her on a social website and quickly got chatting in skype. She was 18, I was 19. I discovered she's in a LDR with someone but lately they aren't getting along too well. That's when I knew I should go for her.

She was an awesome person that I could talk anything and was also very honest (and so was I), quickly after a few months of flirting and fun conversations we become a couple.

 

From there everything went out extremely smoothly, we used to chat everyday, have fun and she loved the heck out of me (so did I of course), we both knew it it was gonna last.

 

BREAKUP

3 months passed like a fly, I felt like heaven being around her (she was also my first gf btw). Until one week in october/november when she basically did not send me any type of message, nothing! I became concerned and I had my suspicions but I prayed it was just her being busy or something. Sent her a message and said she was at a sleepover (she didn't have a sleep over in like 10 years btw) and I got even more suspicious of why she wouldn't tell me about that.

 

Next week monday she comes to me and says that she fell in love with a guy she knew for 3 years, but still she doesn't want to throw me away. My heart basically exploded, I called her and had a long chat of why she did that. She told me everything and says she's sorry and she understands if I hate her. She respected me and told me the situation, also saying that she didn't know was able to fall for someone else. The girl that I felt the most love in the world cheated on me. I was devastated. She used to date that guy since a while (2 or 3 weeks I thought) and only lately seems like it became more serious. After the long talk we decided to keep our honest friendship and still chat and such but we didn't know if we want to be friends or..... a weird kind of relationship.

 

AFTER BREAKUP

In the second day after the break-up she actually said "You can be my daddy (she used to call me like that all the time), but I donno what we will do with it." It's clear that she still had feelings for me. I quickly became very clingy around her and tried to have as many conversations as possible. After a while things started to cool off and I took a 2 week break doing the "No contact rule" hoping it may work, it did and she came to me being all goofy and happy, we chat a bit but she invited her bf to dinner so I said see ya later.

 

After some other chats she started to become cold, it may've been the school problems and such but at one point she even became rude like saying "I only do favors when they work in mine". Anyway I took another long break and had some one-sided chats after...

 

New year passed, It's January and my feelings come back to me again in waves and I seriously have no idea what to do. We used to fight about it and she said its getting annoying now. I got in a really bad spot a week ago but thankfully she came back and messaged me.

 

RIGHT NOW

At this right moment I saw a fb post of them being in a relationship since august half and I quickly messaged her on whatsapp because I was confused of why did she hid it for so long, I wanted to know the full truth. She got mad and said she will block me, and so she did. Whatsapp was the only one that I got blocked from her, I'm not blocked on facebook or skype so I can still contact her (was this intentional or did she forgot to block me everywhere? I think it was intentional) but I want to give myself a break from her. I want to cut my feelings off for her but still keep her as a friend, still... I kinda want her back but I don't think I have a chance. How can I deal with my emotions?

 

Thank you very much for reading, it means a lot.

[mightycpa]

What you do, Mr. Frost, is to find your doo-dads, endure the pain, and finish the blocking job that she started. Whether or not you realize it, you need to make yourself impossible to reach electronically. That's why you need those doo-dads, because that will take courage.

 

Your heart, my friend, speaks honestly but lies to you, all at the same time. You need to ignore it for now.

 

But what if she.... STOP RIGHT THERE. The answer is "so what if she...".

 

You can do what you need to do the hard and slow way or the really hard and really slow way. What I've outlined above is the hard way. What you're doing is the really hard way. Take your pick, because you're going to end up in the same place. It's just a matter of time and effort on your part.