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Valentine's Day- not a HUGE fan, to do something or ignore?


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Posted

My bf and I (yes bf now for those of you who have been following-- we had a talk and he and I both agreed to "call it what it is" aka graduate form exclusively dating to bf and gf) have been together for about 8 months.

 

With Valentine's Day approaching I'm not sure what to do... let him take the lead and don't mention it at all? (I feel like guys generally don't care/perhaps dread valentine's day) or suggest going out to dinner for it?

 

I'm not interested in going ALL OUT for it, but would just like to mark the day/acknowledge it somehow.

 

I've had 1 longterm bf before during Valentine's Day and I suggested dinner then he picked the place and that seemed to work fine. I've always struggled with gifts for guys though...

 

What's a good/small Valentine's gift for a guy?

 

(For those of you that have been following my posts.... he has introduced me to more people in his life without me having to ask. He invited me to his cousin's bday party out of state, his college reunion out of state, as well as drinks with his close friend and friend's wife. We have plans this weekend to hang out with that same friend again at show.)

Posted

dress up in sexy lingerie. make it fun.

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Posted

Whilst i hate the stigma assosicated round Valentines day, and it's just another commercialised fad, i'd be quite upset if the person I was dating wasn't interested and didn't do anything on Valentines day, now i've always taken my girl out for a meal, I've been single for nearly three years now so I kind of forget what it feels like, but i'd expect a nice meal out and maybe a romantic night in at the least, as above, wear something diferent and have some fun :)

Posted

Congrats on the bf-gf new status.

 

If you ignore Valentine's Day then what message are you sending out? If you don't mention anything and don't do anything then you'll have to live by that for the rest of your relationship with him. If these events are important to you than make it known you like them and are looking forward to it.

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Posted

Guys like Valentines Day because getting laid is pretty much a given.

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Posted
Congrats on the bf-gf new status.

 

If you ignore Valentine's Day then what message are you sending out? If you don't mention anything and don't do anything then you'll have to live by that for the rest of your relationship with him. If these events are important to you than make it known you like them and are looking forward to it.

 

So to say something along the lines of, "looking forward to the longweekend and it's also VD... do you want to go to dinner or something?"

 

want it to come across that i'm not crazy obsessed with it, but definitely want to do something/mark the day

Posted
Guys like Valentines Day because getting laid is pretty much a given.

 

Guys like it for other reasons too, like celebrating love and special connection. What guys don't like is huge expectations and the possibility that whatever we do won't be deemed good enough. Ladies, if you want to make it really nice, lower expectations and let him know there's no pressure... and do a little something for him too, like buy him a card. Unsubscribe from the media/ad hype.

  • Like 2
Posted

Suggest a nice place you have seen but haven't eaten in before and say to him, "wouldn't that restaurant be lovely for Valentines Day?" and flutter your eyelashes. He should definitely take the hint. Just act like it's a given you'll be doing something but give him the chance to make plans.

 

Also sexy lingerie is the way forward.

  • Like 1
Posted
Guys like it for other reasons too, like celebrating love and special connection. What guys don't like is huge expectations and the possibility that whatever we do won't be deemed good enough. Ladies, if you want to make it really nice, lower expectations and let him know there's no pressure... and do a little something for him too, like buy him a card. Unsubscribe from the media/ad hype.

 

I agree with this. Let him know you appreciate whatever he comes up with as the guy if he cares will likely worry somewhat about whether you'll like what he decides to do for it. That's why I don't think it does any harm to at least indirectly indicate what you'd like to do so he has some idea.

 

One thing I've learned in my past relationships is that I was stubborn before. I thought, "why should I mention this? He should know to do it". I now know that I don't have to be surprised all the time and can give the guy a chance.

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Posted

I always pick ones that don't like it. I occasionally give a black anti-valentine gift, but most importantly...

 

Celebrate the whole rest of the year as if it were valentines day

  • Author
Posted (edited)
I agree with this. Let him know you appreciate whatever he comes up with as the guy if he cares will likely worry somewhat about whether you'll like what he decides to do for it. That's why I don't think it does any harm to at least indirectly indicate what you'd like to do so he has some idea.

 

One thing I've learned in my past relationships is that I was stubborn before. I thought, "why should I mention this? He should know to do it". I now know that I don't have to be surprised all the time and can give the guy a chance.

 

yeah, i'm definitely willing to suggest something rather than let him come up with everything from scratch... seems like a lot of pressure that way and I wouldn't like if someone did that to me without even an inkling of a hint.

 

I'm not expecting anything grand and will be appreciative of whatever he does. I've found (bday and xmas) if I ask for something he usually does just that/ he does what he knows will make me happy.

 

 

As far as a gift, I was thinking:

 

1) An engraved (red) swiss army knife

 

OR

 

2) An edible arrangement (loves fruit but not so much chocolate, and said he would eat an arrangement)

 

OR

 

3) socks... just bc have an inside joke about it and he really likes them/collection of fun ones

 

any suggestions?

 

Thanks!

Edited by ThisisIt606
added gift question
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