Sunyata Posted January 24, 2016 Share Posted January 24, 2016 Could you tell me if this message is okay? This is a girl I've met 3 times in real life. Friend of a friend. I messaged her, she added me on FB, invited me to a concert when she couldn't make coffee (the plan that made her have to cancel coffee was later corroborated in Facebook photos, it was a surprise party for a friend). We've chatted consistently since then, but she doesn't initiate. But she replies and asks questions when I start, and told me to message her whenever I want. She has a lot of trauma in her past like myself. I like her and could like her just as a friend, since I'm not trying to be in a serious relationship. This is the message I was going to write: Hey! Let's still get coffee sometime. Talk about life, starting new things, or whatever else. It will be good! I know you don't have a car for awhile, is there anywhere near you that would be good? Is that too pushy or creepy? Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted January 24, 2016 Share Posted January 24, 2016 geeez no one knows how to flirt anymore...... 3 Link to post Share on other sites
ilovemusic3 Posted January 24, 2016 Share Posted January 24, 2016 That sounds good Sunyata. Link to post Share on other sites
risjurad Posted January 24, 2016 Share Posted January 24, 2016 (edited) geeez no one knows how to flirt anymore...... I can't speak for others, but I know if I did, I wouldn't be asking. Edited January 24, 2016 by risjurad Link to post Share on other sites
Robratory Posted January 24, 2016 Share Posted January 24, 2016 (edited) Hey! Let's still get coffee sometime. Talk about life, starting new things, or whatever else. It will be good! I know you don't have a car for awhile, is there anywhere near you that would be good? Is that too pushy or creepy? No, definitely not! It's a perfectly fine message. I've not gone through your posting history, so I don't know what you mean by "trauma," but I would insert a note of caution. Two people struggling to overcome something can be of mutual help and support, but it can also happen that the combination of the two quickly turns toxic and bad for both. Don't walk on eggshells, but be observant enough, and if she gets weird, well, back off. Edited January 24, 2016 by Robratory Link to post Share on other sites
PogoStick Posted January 25, 2016 Share Posted January 25, 2016 Hey! Let's still get coffee sometime. Talk about life, starting new things, or whatever else. It will be good! I know you don't have a car for awhile, is there anywhere near you that would be good? It would still be better to be specific. Instead of "coffee sometime", say "I've been craving an iced latte, want to join me for one on Thursday?" (pick a day about 2-3 days out) If she says she's busy that day, then you can respond with "What time/day works for you?" And if after that she says "I'm really busy and don't have time right now", then you know she's just not interested. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts