twistedsister1969 Posted January 24, 2016 Posted January 24, 2016 My boyfriend and I decided we moved way too fast by immediately moving in with each other straight out of previous relationships. I moved out so we can start over and date (exclusively ). I'm not handling this very well at all. I miss him and I want to go to sleep with him at night and wake up with him every morning. Has anyone else ever went backwards to move forward?
ExpatInItaly Posted January 24, 2016 Posted January 24, 2016 Can you give a bit more information, OP? For example: 1) How long did you know each other before you moved in together, and whose idea was it? 2) Who initiated the discussion about moving too quickly, and what preceded this? Had you been fighting or something? 3) How long have you now been together? 4) How long have you now been living apart? 5) Does he know you're not handling it well? If so, how does he respond? Generally I haven't really seen any examples of couples coming back from this, to be honest. But answering the above questions would provide some helpful insights for the posters here.
Author twistedsister1969 Posted January 24, 2016 Author Posted January 24, 2016 We've known each other for several years. We were both married to other people and both divorced. Really good friends. Started dating in 2014. Moved in together in march 2015. I moved out last week. He does know I'm having a hard time with it at times. Neither of us have ever lived alone. I am in counseling and my counselor says this is a great idea.....I don't agree. Oh and yes we argue all of the time...but I still miss him like crazy
ExpatInItaly Posted January 24, 2016 Posted January 24, 2016 And who initiated both the move-in and move-out? What were you fighting about? Why don't you agree it's a great idea to live on your own for a while? And what does your boyfriend say when he knows you're struggling with this? A lot of questions, yes. But important ones, I think.
preraph Posted January 24, 2016 Posted January 24, 2016 Look, it's not what you want to hear, but you both need to live alone. You just don't realize how influenced you are by other people until you are making all your own decisions, plus surviving alone gives you confidence so you're not scared every time you break up with someone or stay in a crap relationship. Everyone needs to have a couple of years on their own to really develop their true selves. 1
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