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Saying 'I love you' too soon?


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Posted

My bf and I have been dating for close to 3 months. We weren't intimate until almost a month into dating. I won't speak about the relationship, 'cuz then I'll be here forever, but it's going very well. One day, he drops me off at my mom's and I run to get a gift I bought him (no special occasion) and give it to him. As we say bye, he says "I love you" as part of his parting (first time ever). It took me by surprise because at that point, it was barely 2 months into dating. I am not scared of commitment at all, but scared of feelings if it's too fast. I usually take my time and I'm very cautious. I guess my face said it all and that fact I shook my head, that he hasn't said it again since then.

 

This weekend, I was at a birthday party with him at his Aunt's house. We were on the couch, and he said in our native language, that he likes me very much (it could also translate into "I love you" in English, but it's not really "love"). Then he switched to English and joked by saying "I would say the L word, but someone doesn't want me to.. what is that word again?" and we laughed and just kept conversation going by switching subject.

 

The thing is, it's not that I don't like that word, it's just I'm scared of it being too soon and this is just the "honeymoon" stage. I actually have been wanting to tell him that I love him the past week, but I stop myself because I'm scared of it being too soon. Like I feel this honeymoon stage will be over and then it won't feel the same and we've already said how much we love each other. I don't know, maybe I'm way over thinking those words.

 

We do spend alot of time together, so I can't even count how many "dates" we've had. Met both families already. Spend almost every weekend with each other (on top of some week days). Just incase someone asks how long we see each other and how many dates in the past 2-3 months.

Posted

None of the stats matter - how do YOU feel about him? There is no right or wrong timeline.

  • Like 2
Posted
None of the stats matter - how do YOU feel about him? There is no right or wrong timeline.

 

This is all you need to know.

Posted

Feeling an affection we interpret as "love" can happen very quickly. Like VeveCakes said, how do you feel? Don't be afraid of love. Just don't do dumb things because you're in love. :)

Posted

You're over thinking it. Even if he does say "I love you" while still in the infatuation stage, what's the harm? It's not like he's proposing marriage.

Posted

You are over thinking it. I get it, those words are important. I only ever say them if I feel them. But that isn't dependent on time. Who cares if its the honeymoon stage? Isn't that when you're supposed to fall in love? Otherwise, when that stage ends, you wouldn't want to be with them because you aren't in love with them. Saying them at any point doesn't make it any less special any other time. It's kind of like saying you don't want to say I love you until your wedding day or it isn't as special when you're married. Chill out. Say them when you feel it and when you want. Don't worry about it being too early or too late, there is no timeline for these things.

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Posted

Thanks, I guess I am definitely over analyzing the time frame too much. I do love him and I'll muster up the courage to say it soon :) Don't want to discourage him from saying it either because of how I usually am with going slow.

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