Is he really sick or play or playing games?

[BugMeLilly]

I met this guy online. Right off the bat he was telling me he felt this fantastic connection to me and that me and that he hoped I would like him when we finally met. Well our first date came and went and quite honestly it was the best first date I've ever had and all of my 40 something years and I easily can see myself falling in love with him he's all I think about. At the end of the day we started talking about our second date which happened a few days later he came over to my place and we watched movies . This was equally as fantastic of the date he left telling me that he really liked me I gave them a big kiss and a hug I left the meeting happy just totally excited about what was going to come I asked him what he thought about me he said he couldn't wait to get to know me and left it at that. We have had the dreaded are you seeing any other people conversation I am not he also tells me he is not however I did find him on OkCupid online he says he was just checking messages which I trust him if he says that he's not seeing anybody else I trust that because that's the kind of person that I am maybe stupid maybe not I don't know but it's too early for me to be flinging accusations somebody I really like. When he was here for our second date he started coughing a little bit and he said he felt like he was getting sick I'm a nurse I did feel his four head he felt a little warm his cheeks were flushed so I do think that there was some legit Ness to what was going on with his illness but now here we are a week later and he's been sick and I've been texting him he hardly response to his text because he sleeping all the time when he's not sleeping he's at work and he can't respond to his messages at work unless he's having A slow day which working in the public in retail hardly ever happens. When he wakes up and he sees that I've texted him a half dozen times or so while he's sleeping he tells me how I knew really need to lay off that's a bit too much you're going to scare me away this is happened twice I don't want to scare him away because I really like him in fact I would go as far as saying I'm pretty close to falling in love with him but I have yet to tell him that . My question is I feel like he's using his sickness as a reason not to talk to me like yesterday was his day off we talked a little bit in the morning and then in the afternoon I sent him a message that said I was lonesome are you sleeping if not do you want to chat and I never heard from them is it possible that he slept all afternoon and never woke up I suppose it's possible if he's really sick but I haven't Heard from him and so I sit here by myself day after day thinking about him just wanting to be with him I want him to come home to me after work so I can make him dinner and we can cuddle up and watch TV and just be together we don't have to do anything fancy I just want to spend time with them and get to know with get to know him. In the beginning of the relationship he was asking me all kinds of questions about can you see us married someday and he was nervous about our first date I hope that you like me I really want you to follow up with me I feel a strong connection with you all of those things that he was worried about it happens I can see myself married to this guy I can see my future with him I want to be with him I want to be close to them I want to learn everything I can about him to push forward to and ultimate happily ever after but I feel like I'm being brushed off now when he was here he told me that when he gets sick he gets grouchy so I don't know if maybe that is part of the reason I haven't heard from them so I don't know what to do I don't know if I should just leave it be and wait for him to contact me or if I should just assume he's no longer interested in me and MoveOn I really really really like this guy he's everything I've always wanted all of it and he has the special connection when I look at him that I've never had with anybody else my friends think I'm crazy and that maybe so but I'm crazy about him please help me, he isn't talking to me the was before and I fear I might be getting the let's just be friends talk shortly and i do go want that, I want a chance for much more with him. He is the real deal.

Edited January 14, 2016 by BugMeLilly
Typo

[lilmissjava]

This was so hard to read but when someone tells you to lay off, that's what you do.

 

You are coming across as needy and clingy and if he says he is sick, believe that he is sick. You aren't even close enough to a relationship with him to be having these trust issues.

 

Don't contact him. If he wants to reach out to you then he will do that. In the meantime, keep your options open.

[katiegrl]

Good heavens, back off!

 

Half a dozen text messages while he was sick and sleeping?

 

Come on now girl, get a grip...you are turning him off...with all that neediness and clinginess.

 

I realize you're anxious, we all get anxious, but you need to learn to contain, contain, contain.

 

Go for a run or something, jeez.

 

He has already told you to "lay off" -- that's pretty harsh, but if I were you I would listen to what he is telling you, and back off....let him come to you.

 

Hopefully, once you do that, his attraction for you will return...but it was way too soon for you to get this intense with him.....it would have most people running for the hills no matter how attracted they were initially.

[BugMeLilly]

In the beginning he would text me every 10 or 15 minutes asking me what are you thinking what are you doing hi did I lose you every five minutes he was on me and it was almost distracting and annoying but I like the attention and I'm not getting it anymore I assume because he's sick but he's not missing work he doesn't text me during workday anymore either so I don't really know what to make of this guy I don't know if he's just not into me anymore or if I just ****ed up I don't know I really like this guy I don't know what to do to get myself back on track to his way of thinking where we were I really like them and I thought he really liked me I've taken that step back I don't know how to get his attention back

[Redhead14]

I met this guy online. Right off the bat he was telling me he felt this fantastic connection to me and that me and that he hoped I would like him when we finally met. Well our first date came and went and quite honestly it was the best first date I've ever had and all of my 40 something years and I easily can see myself falling in love with him he's all I think about. At the end of the day we started talking about our second date which happened a few days later he came over to my place and we watched movies . This was equally as fantastic of the date he left telling me that he really liked me I gave them a big kiss and a hug I left the meeting happy just totally excited about what was going to come I asked him what he thought about me he said he couldn't wait to get to know me and left it at that. We have had the dreaded are you seeing any other people conversation I am not he also tells me he is not however I did find him on OkCupid online he says he was just checking messages which I trust him if he says that he's not seeing anybody else I trust that because that's the kind of person that I am maybe stupid maybe not I don't know but it's too early for me to be flinging accusations somebody I really like. When he was here for our second date he started coughing a little bit and he said he felt like he was getting sick I'm a nurse I did feel his four head he felt a little warm his cheeks were flushed so I do think that there was some legit Ness to what was going on with his illness but now here we are a week later and he's been sick and I've been texting him he hardly response to his text because he sleeping all the time when he's not sleeping he's at work and he can't respond to his messages at work unless he's having A slow day which working in the public in retail hardly ever happens. When he wakes up and he sees that I've texted him a half dozen times or so while he's sleeping he tells me how I knew really need to lay off that's a bit too much you're going to scare me away this is happened twice I don't want to scare him away because I really like him in fact I would go as far as saying I'm pretty close to falling in love with him but I have yet to tell him that . My question is I feel like he's using his sickness as a reason not to talk to me like yesterday was his day off we talked a little bit in the morning and then in the afternoon I sent him a message that said I was lonesome are you sleeping if not do you want to chat and I never heard from them is it possible that he slept all afternoon and never woke up I suppose it's possible if he's really sick but I haven't Heard from him and so I sit here by myself day after day thinking about him just wanting to be with him I want him to come home to me after work so I can make him dinner and we can cuddle up and watch TV and just be together we don't have to do anything fancy I just want to spend time with them and get to know with get to know him. In the beginning of the relationship he was asking me all kinds of questions about can you see us married someday and he was nervous about our first date I hope that you like me I really want you to follow up with me I feel a strong connection with you all of those things that he was worried about it happens I can see myself married to this guy I can see my future with him I want to be with him I want to be close to them I want to learn everything I can about him to push forward to and ultimate happily ever after but I feel like I'm being brushed off now when he was here he told me that when he gets sick he gets grouchy so I don't know if maybe that is part of the reason I haven't heard from them so I don't know what to do I don't know if I should just leave it be and wait for him to contact me or if I should just assume he's no longer interested in me and MoveOn I really really really like this guy he's everything I've always wanted all of it and he has the special connection when I look at him that I've never had with anybody else my friends think I'm crazy and that maybe so but I'm crazy about him please help me, he isn't talking to me the was before and I fear I might be getting the let's just be friends talk shortly and i do go want that, I want a chance for much more with him. He is the real deal. ��

 

You're close to falling in love with him??? After 2 dates????

 

I don't know but it's too early for me to be flinging accusations somebody I really like -- But it's not too early to be falling in love???

 

my friends think I'm crazy and that maybe so but I'm crazy about him -- you are not crazy about him, you are crazy about the "idea" you have about him and the potential . . .

 

In the beginning of the relationship -- It's been two dates and now he's being sketchy, going dark on you . . . there is no relationship -- yet, and it's appears unlikely at the moment.

 

You are rushing this! Sit back. Don't initiate anything and observe what he does. Resist the temptation to reach out anymore, please. If you do, he may go along with it, but you'll still be wondering if he would have done it himself. Let him come to you if he is going to.

[smudge21]

You so need to take a step back. I've recently received some eye-opening advice and it made me realise I was smothering someone and therefore not giving them the chance to miss me or even work out how she feels about me. You're doing the same, if not worse. Let him go for a few days, a week and see if he gets in touch but also see how you feel. Yes, it will be hard (I know full well how it can affect ones ego to go from so much contact to no contact from someone you like) but what's your alternative, carry on chasing to the point of stalking.

 

Back off and if he comes to you then play it cool, but if he doesn't then at least you know. I firmly believe that if someone likes another, they will always show it. If they don't, then they never did.

[sin miedo]

In the beginning he would text me every 10 or 15 minutes asking me what are you thinking what are you doing hi did I lose you every five minutes he was on me and it was almost distracting and annoying but I like the attention and I'm not getting it anymore I assume because he's sick but he's not missing work he doesn't text me during workday anymore either so I don't really know what to make of this guy I don't know if he's just not into me anymore or if I just ****ed up I don't know I really like this guy I don't know what to do to get myself back on track to his way of thinking where we were I really like them and I thought he really liked me I've taken that step back I don't know how to get his attention back

 

Whoa, ever heard of a period? It makes sentences sooo much easier to read.

 

Anyway, you're coming across as very needy, and that's a major turn-off to guys. I think you need to work on yourself before trying to get this guy back. Clearly you have low self-worth, so I'd personally recommend seeing a therapist.