Ally2518 Posted January 12, 2016 Posted January 12, 2016 (edited) Hey guys! I've been having this issue for quite some time now and I'm not entirely sure how to handle it. It's more of a personal issue, and even though I've asked my closest friends about their opinions, I would love to hear what others have to say and what other have gone through. And I tried searching this on the internet but I can't come across this subject anywhere so hopefully I'll get some insight from you guys. LONG story short, I've been in a serious 4 year relationship. Very much in love, hoping on getting married soon and finding a place of our own as soon as we get our finances all sorted out. But at the beginning of me and my boyfriends relationship we were a little rocky (I was 17, he was 23, I am now going to be 22 soon and he will be 26) and my friend thought that she could give a guy my number in hopes of breaking me and my BF apart because she thought it would be best for me. I hold nothing against her anymore, I know she was trying to look out for me and being 17 I was stupid and kind of trusted everyone and I was naive so I had no idea that this guy was even trying to get in my pants. I thought we were just friends. We would text every now and then and he would give me advice on my relationship. As soon as I felt that he had feelings for me I backed off, I made it clear from the beginning that I was not interested. We caught up again months later and I felt that he started to like me again so I asked him why and he told me all these things so I decided that the friendship just wasn't working out seeing that he had different intentions. We never hung out, rarely talked. We worked in the same mall at the time so we would wave hi every now and then, never made any physical contact. Well as time went on after ending the relationship, I come to find out that my friend Lauren who gave him my number told him I thought he was hot (I know, sounds like highschool drama) and pretty much egged him on to think that because me and my boyfriend were going through a rough patch that he should try and squeeze his way in and "save me." That made me so angry because I told her countless times that I was not interested in that way. I always wanted to fix what me and my boyfriend were going through and now I can only imagine what was going through the guys head whenever we would talk. Well needless to say I ended my friendship with Lauren as well. I don't need that kind of drama and anxiety in my life. And though this was almost 4 years ago, I can't help but wonder if someone will try and break me and my boyfriend up. What if Lauren or my guy friend one day try and meddle again and tell my boyfriend I cheated on him? What if they tell him I had feelings for other guys or say SOMETHING to my boyfriend to try and ruin what we have? I know I sound crazy...and my friends are saying that if they wanted to do that they would've done that by now but I don't find that necessarily true. I'm just scared that people will try and get in the middle of my relationship. Has anyone had this happen? Not really exactly what I've been through but has anyone had people get in the middle and try and break you and your significant other apart? How did you handle it? Edited January 12, 2016 by Ally2518
RySant Posted January 12, 2016 Posted January 12, 2016 Scary. Never thought of this kind of scenario... being set-up! But you can't be set-up if all these things have been communicated with your boyfriend... did you? And I have this feeling that Lauren might have a thing on your BF so she's trying to break you up... I am not helping am i?
Author Ally2518 Posted January 12, 2016 Author Posted January 12, 2016 Well I've talked to him about it. More like little conversations here and there. I don't want him to feel like I have feelings for this guy if I keep bringing him up or make him feel "why are you so paranoid? You shouldn't be paranoid if nothing happened." But it's gotten to the point where I'll think of every possibility and it's always the worst outcomes and I just don't want to feel like people are trying to ruin one of the best things I have in my life. I even got back in touch with my guy friend to see if he felt like I did anything to give him the wrong impression and he said no and that he felt like I didn't do anything wrong. Which was nice to know but now I feel like I gave him the upper hand. Lmao. I sound so crazy. I get so scared of losing my boyfriend I become paranoid about everything and everyone. Im hoping this will pass.
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