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Is it possible for someone to be very experienced and yet a bad kisser?

Northwestern1011

By Northwestern1011
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Northwestern1011 Member

Northwestern1011

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Is it possible for a man to make it past his 30th birthday, become very sexually experienced, and yet still not be a good kisser? I would figure experience in bed and experience with someone as simple as kissing would always parallel each other, making it difficult for you to get good at one without the other. I would figure by 30ish, a guy has kissed several dozen women, so how could he not get better at kissing?

mrldii Established Member

mrldii

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Absolutely, it's possible. Sex and kissing are two completely different acts, which utilize completely different *muscles*.

 

 

 

It's equally possible that he's just not your kind of a "good kisser", so you find him to be a "bad kisser".

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RecentChange Established Member

RecentChange

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While I agree, kissing is generally a good litmus test....

 

A lot of it comes down to preferences, how YOU like to kiss, verses how they do etc.

 

I think of kissing like a dance, generally I like to lead... and set the tone.

 

I have known some great kissers who turned out to be kinda lousy lovers... and vice versa.

 

And some I didn't mesh with that well when it came to kissing - but ahh, they knew how to handle me in other ways :love:

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Northwestern1011 Member

Northwestern1011

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No this is legitimately not good kissing. I've never kissed anyone who does it like this. It's almost as if it's aggressive? Like he will smash his nose against me, like he never learned to tip his head just slightly, and I've never HEARD myself kiss.

 

It's not that I mind, it's more that I'm curious. It's not a turn off. I've kind of been trying to get him to tip his head a little.

Edited by Northwestern1011
thecrucible Established Member

thecrucible

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I think kissing is pretty much a prequel to the bedroom. If the kiss doesn't do it for me in any way, I start to lose interest...and I have tested this theory out before. But yeah I think it would be a possible for a guy not to know what he's doing in that department, especially if he has only known a woman as a hot body before. IMO the guys who have been in LTRs before tend to be good at that sort of thing so it's the quality of the interactions they have had and not the quantity that influences their skills.

Robratory Established Member

Robratory

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No this is legitimately not good kissing. I've never kissed anyone who does it like this. It's almost as if it's aggressive? Like he will smash his nose against me

 

Maybe his last girlfriend had an itty bitty tiny little nose? You don't happen to have a huge honker, do you? :laugh:

 

Seriously, if he's otherwise all right and you want different kisses, you kiss him. You control the kiss. Don't let him become as if aggressive.

Phoenician Established Member

Phoenician

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well it proves one thing ,

he was having mainly physical relations that don't involve a lot of kissin .

when passion exists ,he will take great time in kissing and foreplay...

Erik30 Established Member

Erik30

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I think he actually could be inexperienced, and might have "lied" about his past relationships. (If you ever discussed that)

It's a turn off for some women at his age, so maybe he hides his lack of experience.

StBreton Established Member

StBreton

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Kissing, when done right, is crazy good. I've broken up with guys who were not bad kissers...I can teach a mediocre kisser but a bad one ... Next. I'm a girl with a little nose and don't like being beaten up with such an intimate activity. Some guys are just clueless or really think they are great kissers.

 

Maybe you could jokingly say, "kissing is so amazing but it's hard to figure out what to do with the noses" giggle giggle

Edited by StBreton
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Northwestern1011 Member

Northwestern1011

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For those wondering: I do not have a big nose, and neither does he. That's why I don't get why this happens. I've also never had a "noisey" kiss. Like with sound. In my experience, with kissing there's kind of a lean in-an approach--with him there is no approach. It's like it's 0 to 60 instantly.

 

I don't think he lied at all about having many partners--I do believe that. Whole heartedly. So that's why I'm so confused--could a few dozen women not correct a man on kissing? Do they just say nothing?

StBreton Established Member

StBreton

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Did he have many partners but no real longer term relationships? Maybe the girls gave up after a few weeks. What kind of experience did he truly have? How about making suggestions to him if he's the guy for you? Why be shy about it? He sounds clueless or just an overbearing jerk. You know him ...we can only guess

Edited by StBreton
Redhead14 Established Member

Redhead14

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Is it possible for a man to make it past his 30th birthday, become very sexually experienced, and yet still not be a good kisser? I would figure experience in bed and experience with someone as simple as kissing would always parallel each other, making it difficult for you to get good at one without the other. I would figure by 30ish, a guy has kissed several dozen women, so how could he not get better at kissing?

 

It may not be that he is a bad kisser, he just doesn't kiss the way you like to kiss. Another woman may be happy with the way he kisses. Who knows? But, I'd say if you are kissing and/or being intimate, it should be OK for you to say, "hey, I'd like it if we ___ while kissing". Some people don't even really like kissing deeply for reasons known only to them usually, but if they are willing/open to trying different things, great.

lord193 Member

lord193

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So what if he's a bad kisser? If you blame someone because of that like one said "next" then you are just not worthy of his time. You move on and find a great kisser and a guy with bad personality.

MightyQuinn Established Member

MightyQuinn

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My ex got better at sex and worse at kissing as time went by. I think kissing basically became a stepping stone to sex that he just wanted to get past so he could get to the main course.

Redhead14 Established Member

Redhead14

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There is one substantiated caveat regarding kissing I will add . . . men who are either emotionally stunted or uninvolved, will shy away from kissing or acts of tenderness -- caressing, not much foreplay, etc. On some level, to them, those things are more intimate than sex even. So, those types of men will usually get right down to "biness" . . .

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StBreton Established Member

StBreton

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So what if he's a bad kisser? If you blame someone because of that like one said "next" then you are just not worthy of his time. You move on and find a great kisser and a guy with bad personality.

 

You mean because it's so nice to have someone aggressively and repeatedly smash their face and nose against me? Right.

 

Lots of guys with great personalities and awesome kissers. I have zero desire to endure feeling physically violated with an intimate and wonderful activity such as kissing.

Michelle ma Belle Established Member

Michelle ma Belle

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My experience has been yes.

 

My last boyfriend who also happens to be the love of my life, was an amazing lover but not the best kisser unfortunately. It didn't matter all that much despite my love of kissing because he was wonderful in so many other areas of our relationship.

 

I've dated two other men who I would classify as really bad kissers. One moaned while he kissed and another shoved his tongue so far down my throat I always felt the need to gag! The first guy was just as horrible in bed as he was a kisser (very selfish) but the other man was quite good in bed, very attentive (he was much older).

 

Moral of the story? One does not exclude the other necessarily.

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