TeddyPSmith Posted January 10, 2016 Posted January 10, 2016 Matched with a girl on Tinder about 6 weeks ago. We've been texting every day and have gone out three times. We had a great time each time we went out. I found myself really developing feelings for this girl but wasn't sure if the feelings were mutual. The feelings were so strong that it scared me. We never really talked about anything like that and hadn't kissed yet. I read some articles about dating other women so as not to put all of your eggs in one basket...so thats what i did. I went on two dates with two different women. One of those dates was the same day as the one that I really liked. Somehow she found out and asked me about it. I was honest with her. Since then, I feel like she's gone cold on me. I apologized for it and told her that I assumed she was also seeing other people. She said that she didn't know why i would think that. Our texting as been so sporadic lately that it's hard to get a clear picture. Any advice on what I can do? I asked her out to lunch and she pretty much turned me down. I really don't want to let this one slip by. Thanks
Buddhist Posted January 10, 2016 Posted January 10, 2016 Matched with a girl on Tinder about 6 weeks ago. We've been texting every day and have gone out three times. We had a great time each time we went out. I found myself really developing feelings for this girl but wasn't sure if the feelings were mutual. The feelings were so strong that it scared me. We never really talked about anything like that and hadn't kissed yet. I read some articles about dating other women so as not to put all of your eggs in one basket...so thats what i did. I went on two dates with two different women. One of those dates was the same day as the one that I really liked. Somehow she found out and asked me about it. I was honest with her. Since then, I feel like she's gone cold on me. I apologized for it and told her that I assumed she was also seeing other people. She said that she didn't know why i would think that. Our texting as been so sporadic lately that it's hard to get a clear picture. Any advice on what I can do? I asked her out to lunch and she pretty much turned me down. I really don't want to let this one slip by. Thanks Sounds like its too late Teddy, the horse has bolted. She was clearly offended that you didn't see her as enough to stop looking around. She's gone. Your actions have spoken for you. I would do the same to be honest. Some women won't tolerate multi-daters, she appears to be one of them.
xcupid Posted January 10, 2016 Posted January 10, 2016 Sounds like she's lost interest in you, sorry to say. Not much you can do about that but move on.
Author TeddyPSmith Posted January 10, 2016 Author Posted January 10, 2016 well thats not what i wanted to hear. Any chance i could explain my reasoning?
hippychick3 Posted January 10, 2016 Posted January 10, 2016 I think there's still a chance. The fact that she was upset you had dated others after her shows interest on her part. I would attempt to contact her again and let her know that you'd like to pursue dating her and only her (if that's what you want). She may need further reassurance from you. You have nothing to lose by reaching out again.
Buddhist Posted January 10, 2016 Posted January 10, 2016 well thats not what i wanted to hear. Any chance i could explain my reasoning? Explain away but unless she's interested in hearing it, it won't make any difference. For educational purposes here's how I see it.... If a guy did that to me I would immediately assume he wasn't into me very much and was just hanging onto dating me until someone better comes along. Yeah, no contest I would be disappointed sure and then move on. If he then tried to explain to me that he was dating someone else because he was getting too emotionally invested in me, I'd call BS on that and move on. After all I want a guy who's emotionally invested in me. Why would I want a guy who isn't? Yes, yes I know it's your defence mechanism but I'm not dating someone who's taking action to keep themselves un-invested. I suspect a lot of women share this mindset.
Author TeddyPSmith Posted January 10, 2016 Author Posted January 10, 2016 well, Im gonna do what Im gonna do. Maybe it will work and maybe not. At least Ill know I tried! Thanks for the advice!
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