frus69 Posted January 10, 2016 Posted January 10, 2016 This guy I met online a week ago used to text me everyday , all the time. Then we met up, then next day he still texted me, seemingly no difference . But the day after (today) I haven't heard a thing. I noticed that he became friends with a new girl last night ,so I immediately think maybe he is getting hot with her now ? I am thinking about asking him something like "hey are you seeing anyone. You can do it, but I would just like to know" Will that make me look desperate ? Because l feel he broke his pattern and something is definitely up
Gaeta Posted January 10, 2016 Posted January 10, 2016 No no no no, you have no business asking him something like this. You only had 1 date with him, that does not qualify as 'seeing' someone. You may never go on another date with him. When you have at least gone on 3-4 dates then you can ask. 2
TunaCat Posted January 10, 2016 Posted January 10, 2016 You've only known the guy for a week, you don't really know his pattern. Maybe he is seeing someone else, maybe he's seeing LOTS of other somebodies. Go ahead and ask him about it.
Author frus69 Posted January 10, 2016 Author Posted January 10, 2016 I know if he wants to see other people he can. But I usually don't multi date and it just doesn't make me feel good if he is. I even feel like not continuing this if he is multi dating. It just drives me crazy when he suddenly goes quiet. And I can't help but think he is just going to fade. What should I do to about these feelings?
Gaeta Posted January 10, 2016 Posted January 10, 2016 I know if he wants to see other people he can. But I usually don't multi date and it just doesn't make me feel good if he is. I even feel like not continuing this if he is multi dating. It just drives me crazy when he suddenly goes quiet. And I can't help but think he is just going to fade. What should I do to about these feelings? Hon, why do you say it's ok if he multi-dates when it's not true? First you are NOT dating him. You only had a first meeting. Wait for him to invite you on a second date then after you can ask what is his dating style and if he's a multi dater. Don't go telling him you don't mind! it's not true. You go crazy when he goes quiet? You've only met him once. There is no reason here for you to go crazy. You don't even know him, you should not care at all if he talks to you again or not. So RELAX. If he spends 3 days not contacting you then go back online and find someone that wants to date you. 2
hippychick3 Posted January 10, 2016 Posted January 10, 2016 You need to be dating other people too. You've had one date with no mention of exclusivity. You both should be keeping options open and dating others at this point. Any kind of "confrontation" about multi-dating would make you appear needy and desperate at this early stage. Date others so you're not fixated on this one guy after one date.
Author frus69 Posted January 10, 2016 Author Posted January 10, 2016 It just sucks that I didn't find anyone else that I'm interested in...don't even have anyone else to go on date with
Gaeta Posted January 10, 2016 Posted January 10, 2016 It just sucks that I didn't find anyone else that I'm interested in...don't even have anyone else to go on date with I read your last thread. He told you he hoped to see you again soon. What did you reply to that? Did you tell him you'd like to see him again too?
Gaeta Posted January 10, 2016 Posted January 10, 2016 It just sucks that I didn't find anyone else that I'm interested in...don't even have anyone else to go on date with There are new profiles online every day. Just go back and fish. Sometimes the best surprises are when we expect it the least. Also expect it will take time to meet a good one and you will be disappointed more than once. 1
Author frus69 Posted January 10, 2016 Author Posted January 10, 2016 I read your last thread. He told you he hoped to see you again soon. What did you reply to that? Did you tell him you'd like to see him again too? Yeah I told him I'd like that. But for some reason I just don't feel like the second date is going to happen any time soon. Last night when we were texting, I was sort of hinting "do you like spending time with me " to which he replied "yes I had fun (last night ) . Did you ". Of course I said yes but then no reply anymore. Silence till now. Don't know if I'm over thinking, but I find his reply "yeah I had fun" a little off
Gaeta Posted January 10, 2016 Posted January 10, 2016 Yeah I told him I'd like that. But for some reason I just don't feel like the second date is going to happen any time soon. Last night when we were texting, I was sort of hinting "do you like spending time with me " to which he replied "yes I had fun (last night ) . Did you ". Of course I said yes but then no reply anymore. Silence till now. Don't know if I'm over thinking, but I find his reply "yeah I had fun" a little off Frus69: He had a good time but I don't think he's interested in seeing you again. He is continuing his search and you should do the same. If I were you I would not wait after him and go back online right away. If he wanted to see you again he would have invited you again already.
Author frus69 Posted January 10, 2016 Author Posted January 10, 2016 Yes, it will make you look desperate - given the circumstances. You met him once. He hasn't asked you out on a formal date yet. Start dating other men. Maybe one won't be elusive. This guy is still fishing in his pond. Don't get attached. So I can't ask him if he's seeing anyone. Then can I say something like "hey you are a little quiet" or "hey you don't text me much anymore anything ok?"
Author frus69 Posted January 10, 2016 Author Posted January 10, 2016 Frus69: He had a good time but I don't think he's interested in seeing you again. He is continuing his search and you should do the same. If I were you I would not wait after him and go back online right away. If he wanted to see you again he would have invited you again already. He also said "I'm home. My shirt smells like you . Too bad you are not here " and that's when I asked "do you like spending time with me" Hmm I was hoping something more can happen between us
Gaeta Posted January 10, 2016 Posted January 10, 2016 He also said "I'm home. My shirt smells like you . Too bad you are not here That's not something a man serious about dating you would say.
Gaeta Posted January 10, 2016 Posted January 10, 2016 So I can't ask him if he's seeing anyone. Then can I say something like "hey you are a little quiet" or "hey you don't text me much anymore anything ok?" NO NO NO NO Frus: If a man wants to date you he will do everything to date you!! If he doesn't text as much it's because he's not thinking of you. Let it go! He is not interested.
Author frus69 Posted January 10, 2016 Author Posted January 10, 2016 I guess I should stop thinking about him , don't initiate texting anymore and just prepare to move on
Gaeta Posted January 10, 2016 Posted January 10, 2016 I guess I should stop thinking about him , don't initiate texting anymore and just prepare to move on You should not put so much heart in a man you met once. You will be meeting many men that won't connect with you and will be flaking after your 1st meeting. It's normal. It takes time to meet someone and it clicks on both sides.
dobielover Posted January 10, 2016 Posted January 10, 2016 He also said "I'm home. My shirt smells like you . Too bad you are not here " and that's when I asked "do you like spending time with me" Ack. You should not have said that. That's not something a man serious about dating you would say. I don't agree with you, G.
Author frus69 Posted January 10, 2016 Author Posted January 10, 2016 You should not put so much heart in a man you met once. You will be meeting many men that won't connect with you and will be flaking after your 1st meeting. It's normal. It takes time to meet someone and it clicks on both sides. Ah..he clicked with me soo well before we met
Gaeta Posted January 10, 2016 Posted January 10, 2016 Ah..he clicked with me soo well before we met Ok so from now on remember. Everything that is going on before a face to face meeting means nothing. The real test is in real life, not online, not on the phone.
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