unforgotten Posted January 7, 2016 Posted January 7, 2016 (edited) Dude, I am going through a very similar thing. I went out a couple of times with this cutie and really fell for her. We fooled around and I wasn't clingy or suffocating her at all. if anything I was too available and being a nice guy but hey that's me, I don't play games. She was future planing with me ffs. She'd call me often. She said she got me a christmas gift (which I never saw) and then suddenly would start acting hot and cold, telling me everything went too fast for her, that she'd like us to be friends, that she has things to sort out and would like to be alone, it's not you it's me bla bla bla bla. This suddenly came out of a girl's mouth that would at the same time say that I made her feel butterflies the first time she saw me and that has never happened to her before. That I'm such a awesome guy she never met anyone like me before. That we are such a great fit etc. etc. Why the hell did you friendzone me then, wtf? I just took it as a man and when she apologized that she gave me a "false hope" I said she's a good irl and she should take care. then I went NC on her and it helps but I can't say I don't think of her or wonder what has happened and try to make sense of everything. But I guess it'slike someone here said "you can't make sense out of nonsense". God knows what she's thinking and frankly, who cares? It's not your problem man and it's not you who's the problem. We are dealing with immature little confused girls that don't know what they want they want. If they want chasing badasses and getting their heart ripped aparat let them do it right? I think this: "It really sounds like she's uncomfortable because she does not reciprocate your feelings." happened to me too and it was because I was too nice and available. It makes me nervous the moment I realize this and that maybe we would be together if I just wasn't so god damn nice to her. But at the same time I'm thinking she's just immature and if this kind of behavior showed so early on nothing good would wait me around the corner I guess. I'm sad just as you are. I'm sad that world operates like this. How can you "punish" someone for being too nice and "reward" someone for being a dickhead?! Edited January 7, 2016 by unforgotten
trailrunner1975 Posted January 7, 2016 Posted January 7, 2016 My opinion may not be popular among the female crowd, but here goes. The women who choose the ahole get what is coming to them. Being nice does work but you have to find a sane person who expects to be treated right. I question the intelligence of a person who consistently chooses the bad seeds of the dating world. Don't date dumb people.
trailrunner1975 Posted January 7, 2016 Posted January 7, 2016 Suggested reading on this subject: *******s Finish First (Tucker Max)
marky00 Posted January 7, 2016 Posted January 7, 2016 Hmmm this kind of happened to me but I think its easy to just say we were too nice to explain things. Looking at things more closely, I think its not because you were nice but more that you didn't value yourself as much as you did her. This is the mistake many dumpees make. So what do we do to be perfect in all aspects of a relationship. BE AS NICE TO THEM AS YOU LIKE BUT BE JUST AS NICE TO YOU, IF NOT MORE. I think if you do that, you are very unlikely to be dumped by a rational partner.
Author Dashottcalla Posted January 7, 2016 Author Posted January 7, 2016 Wait, why does this need to be another thread? In essence it doesn't. But most people that came to read my topic said it was too long so they didn't bother to read it, so I condensed it. Asides from that I had new information that I wanted some insight on with regards to her inviting me to her sons bday party.
Sar112 Posted January 7, 2016 Posted January 7, 2016 Just be careful re the birthday party - it sounds like this might just be an attempt at friendship again on her behalf. I really feel where you are coming from and have had similar reasons given to me for a break up - 'I do too much' hence they 'don't want to let me down'. Me 'doing too much' means them feeling 'pressured' to act the same. They 'can't be with someone who thinks the world of them, incase they can't live up to their expectations' - etc etc... Personally I'm beginning to think that all these 'reasons' are just excuses and unfair excuses at that. If someone can't appreciate the fact that you are a nice person, then that says a lot about them as a person. Don't be willing to change for someone who can't even recognise your worth.
William Posted January 7, 2016 Posted January 7, 2016 Moderation merged two threads on a similar/identical topic. Please continue that discussion here. Thanks!
Author Dashottcalla Posted January 7, 2016 Author Posted January 7, 2016 Just be careful re the birthday party - it sounds like this might just be an attempt at friendship again on her behalf. I really feel where you are coming from and have had similar reasons given to me for a break up - 'I do too much' hence they 'don't want to let me down'. Me 'doing too much' means them feeling 'pressured' to act the same. They 'can't be with someone who thinks the world of them, incase they can't live up to their expectations' - etc etc... Personally I'm beginning to think that all these 'reasons' are just excuses and unfair excuses at that. If someone can't appreciate the fact that you are a nice person, then that says a lot about them as a person. Don't be willing to change for someone who can't even recognise your worth. Yea, i dont think I'll be going to that bday party anymore. I say this because I follow her on instagram and I notice that her close friends tagged her in a picture meme with two dogs laughing in it called #wastehistime2016.. The post reads "when he's pouring his heart out to you through text and you're showing your best friends". Immediately I know that's what she's been doing with her friends with my messages, now I just feel like an idiot for sending her any texts after she broke it off. Because I really poured my heart out to her and did all I could do in two very long messages, outside of begging, to convince her back. And all I can think of is her and her best friends laughing at all I wrote..
ff12343 Posted January 7, 2016 Posted January 7, 2016 Personally I'm beginning to think that all these 'reasons' are just excuses and unfair excuses at that. If someone can't appreciate the fact that you are a nice person, then that says a lot about them as a person. Don't be willing to change for someone who can't even recognise your worth. They are excuses. Promise.
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