rastafari Posted June 3, 2005 Posted June 3, 2005 well you see im having a tough time getting over this whole breakup. its almost been four months, but it makes it tough because i think she dumped me and started hooking up with my roomate immeaditly. i cant tell if my roomate is with her or her roomate though. its really hard to tell and makes it tough to get off of my mind. i dont live with this guy anymore... but the letter basically just tells about the times she disrespected me for this other guy. how she wanted to take nudes of him without asking me first(photo major). and told me that she didnt want to go out one night because her and this guy allready got a movie and wine. and how i had to take a medical leave from school because i almost commited suacide twice due to that and school..then when i get back this dood sleeps in her apartment for the remaining part of the semister. just how crappy she made me feal and how their "little angel" is a piece of sh*t. but i dont know if she is with this guy or what, her roomate is all over the guy..sooo i dont know if its going to help anyhting, so i dont know if i should send it. i just want to let them know what there little girl did to me and how screwed up she really is(becuuse they dont know). what do you think?
ReluctantRomeo Posted June 3, 2005 Posted June 3, 2005 Originally posted by rastafari i dont know if its going to help anyhting, so i dont know if i should send it. i just want to let them know what there little girl did to me and how screwed up she really is(becuuse they dont know). what do you think? My advice? Don't send it. What do you expect to achieve? And you sound pretty messed up yourself, what with the suicide and everything. All of us need to deal with our own issues before we start a moral crusade to deal with other people. No matter how much they deserve it. Here's a quote which your username suggests you'd appreciate: "First take the log out of your own eye, then you'll see clearly to remove the speck of dust from your brothers' eye".
Jess xx Posted June 3, 2005 Posted June 3, 2005 Do not send this letter! As RR said what do you want to achieve...because if they don't respond you will be left reeling. Blood is thicker than water and although they may see where you are coming from and feel compassionate they are not going to treat their daughter any differently. Trust me, my ex cheated BADLY and I told his mum who was lovely about it and even told me I deserved better but ultimately her feelings were still the same for her son, I got nothing out of it...what could I?
Author rastafari Posted June 3, 2005 Author Posted June 3, 2005 i was thinking that her father might give her a talking to. me and him are/were pretty close and he has stuck up for me in the past. i dont know. im not shure what else i can possibly do to get this off my mind, its honestly taking over mylife. i just wish i knew one way or the other so i could have some closure with this whole deal. i have been going to therapy for the past 3 months or so(because of other issues as well) and nothings helping me at all. i almost ended it all twice last night,very close, im seriously falling apart and dont know what to do.
LucreziaBorgia Posted June 3, 2005 Posted June 3, 2005 Get some help - seriously. Go find a counselor or therapist to talk to on campus. You are drowning, but taking people down with you isn't going to save you or make things better.
Forget About Her Posted June 4, 2005 Posted June 4, 2005 Yea bro, I have to agree. DO NOT send this letter! It's one thing if it's like a happy mother's day card, and your hoping she will call you and strike up a conversation, but do not put your problems between you and her on her parents. That's really childish. I could never imagine involving mine or her parents in our own problems.
westernxer Posted June 4, 2005 Posted June 4, 2005 Telling them about their little girl will only make you sound like a little boy who can't handle himself properly. I can't believe I'm hearing this...
MWC_LifeBeginsAt40 Posted June 4, 2005 Posted June 4, 2005 not to mention it's none of their business, or anyone else's. It's also none of your business what your EX girlfriend is up to. move on.
Author rastafari Posted June 5, 2005 Author Posted June 5, 2005 true, i suppose it is pretty childish.its like im telling on her or some ish. all i know is its the most pain that i have ever been in in my life. i have hed relatives die, pets die and friends die like everyone else and this tops it all. yea it may not be my business what is going on with my ex now. but a lot of that stuff was going on before we even broke up. and now that she dumped it is in my face. its really tough when your first love leaves you and is running around with your roomate before you break up. then after you break up he sleeps in her apartment for the rest of the year. personally i think it is my business because it is shoved in my face, an thats f*cked up. perhaps they are just friends are something, becuse he seems real close to her roomate as well. but this cause me to think of what could be going on all the time. i cant get it out of my head and we broke up like 4 months ago.
westernxer Posted June 5, 2005 Posted June 5, 2005 Took me some time to get over my first serious girlfriend, too... in fact, she lived right across the street from me at the time we broke up. That was my worst year of college, but I finally got over it for good when school let out for summer. Helps that I made no attempt to contact her, too. I ran into her several times the next year, and on a couple occasions she tried to "befriend" me, but I rebuffed her efforts. Chick was a psycho!
Marshbear Posted June 5, 2005 Posted June 5, 2005 Is this girl worth you life? If you do the deed do you think you will punish her for treating you sooo bad? She might be sorry for a day or two but she will think what a psycho you are for doing it and forget you. You will have ended your life for nothing. If you can't handle things then get a different counselor. All are not created equal. Do not send the letter to her parents. You cannot take their love from her and you will just be putting a wall between you and them. You need to end all contact with her. Do not see her. Let time heal your hurt. She is a immature gal and not worthy of all the attention you are giving her. Hold you head up and ACT like you are doing fine when you see her. Don't let her think she hurt you and start talking to other friends and get yourself together. You should be pissed at the roommate as well but you seem to be focusing the blame on her. Find new friends and get on worth your life. Drowning in self pity will not help you. Don't let her tear you down. You're worth better than her. Peace...
Author rastafari Posted June 5, 2005 Author Posted June 5, 2005 i wouldnt do the deed to myself over just a silly girl. everything else went to sh*t as well and is continuing down that wonderful sh*t path. you work and then you die anyways. its summer now and i cant stop thinking about it. she lived 2 floors down and i saw her all the time after becasue we had 2 classes together as well. i have been doin nc for a month(a little before school let out) and it still hurts, she doesnt know it hurts though. she knew i was hurting in the beggining, but for the past 2 months i played it off real nice. i wish i continued to not talk to her and be an as*hole like i was in the beginning, because she didnt want that, it was great. being nice is exactly what she wants though. i went from being a a*s to buying her breakfast. im so weeek. everytime i see her she pulls a 10minute conversation out of me and i end up being mr. nice guy... i dont know if she is running with this guy or not. her roomate might be, my other 2 roomates are closer to me and seem to think so. but they havent seen what i have seen. so i go through this damn vicious cycle of a thought process every signal day. trying to figure out if she is that screwed up, or if her roomates with this guy. it just wont leave my mind. i wish i knew one way or the other so i could have some closure. that is the onlything that is making this hard to get over. if i just knew it would be done.
moimeme Posted June 5, 2005 Posted June 5, 2005 i just want to let them know what there little girl did to me and how screwed up she really is(becuuse they dont know). what do you think? I think I've rarely heard a dumber plan. All you'll do is confirm to the parents and the girl that you are way too messed up for her to be with. Really, you need therapy. Go see a counsellor because you are not thinking straight and you need professional help to get over this person and fly straight.
greenhorn Posted June 5, 2005 Posted June 5, 2005 Hmm, it is difficult when a girl dumps, and more difficult when she starts sleeping with your room-mate the very next day and worse when she was doing this while being in relationship with you. But what you have to do now, is to take care of yourself and not her. Say to yourself that she is gone from your life and gone for good, even if she comes back would you accept a cheat and such a morally depraved person ? I guess your answer is NO. So move on. It is good that you are doing NC, and so be committed to it. It might be difficult, but whatever you do, don't break NC. Don't think of result of NC, just do it. One day you will find that you have moved on and you have got someone nice. And try to stop thinking of her, try to absorb some other thoughts when she comes in your mind. There are lot many crap in this world so don't think of becoming a crusader right now. Bring your life on track and then you will get many opportunities to do such work. Good Luck
westernxer Posted June 5, 2005 Posted June 5, 2005 Originally posted by rastafari i wish i knew one way or the other so i could have some closure. that is the onlything that is making this hard to get over. if i just knew it would be done. What you do know is she doesn't want you... that's all the closure you need. Everything else is immaterial.
alphamale Posted June 5, 2005 Posted June 5, 2005 Originally posted by rastafari what do you think? RASTAFARI, you need quite a few shots of testosterone, oh....and don't send the letter.
XNemesisX Posted June 5, 2005 Posted June 5, 2005 Rastafari, I think you know that sending the letter is not a good idea. What I'm really concerned with is your mental state. You are clearly suicidal. Have you considered checking yourself in to a mental facility? Just seeing a therapist or talking to a counselor doesn't sound like it's enough. Consider admitting yourself and get round the clock help for this.
suegail Posted June 5, 2005 Posted June 5, 2005 I'm sorry for you for many reasons, none of which has anything to do with this girl. I agree with the poster who said you sound as though you need a time of hospitalization. You are in a crisis and you need to get proper care and stabilization. Please do this for yourself.
Author rastafari Posted June 5, 2005 Author Posted June 5, 2005 Originally posted by moimeme I think I've rarely heard a dumber plan. All you'll do is confirm to the parents and the girl that you are way too messed up for her to be with. Really, you need therapy. Go see a counsellor because you are not thinking straight and you need professional help to get over this person and fly straight. haha, thats soo true. i get these damn dumb plans in my mind and think they are going to help me or make things better or whatnot. yea, i guess her parents would truley think of me as crazy and her daughter could do much better. but she cant because im the ****.haha. i have my ups and downs. i am fine at times when i go to therapy, but then i sink over the next few days after and become really negative about everything. i reach these peeks where i do really good, then i just fall apart completely and go to my lowest where i just want to die. and like i said before its not just becuse of a girl, there is lots more to do with it. she was the icing on the cake. but i guess on the bright side it cant get much worse. things can only get better and i need to grow some balls, maby even a d*ck. maby she is sleeping with him, maby not. maby her roomate is sleeping with him, maby not. they are equal suspects. thats what goes through my mind all day long. i wish i just knew so it would help me get over it. if non of that bs was going on then i would have been over this by now.
moimeme Posted June 5, 2005 Posted June 5, 2005 if non of that bs was going on then i would have been over this by now. Wrongo. You're not over it because you let it take over your mind. You have to keep yourself busy doing other things so you don't mope and pine. And if you get depressed every time you leave therapy, tell your doc. Talk therapy might not be enough for you.
Author rastafari Posted June 6, 2005 Author Posted June 6, 2005 ok, thanks guys. what a terrible idea i had. thats horrible i even thought about doing that, its even worse that i posted it on the internet. im just going through horrible times, i need to get my head straight. i need to get out of the house and stay busy, take my own damn advice. if she wants to be a whooooore why should i care about a whooooooore. **** why sould i care about someone that doesnt care about me, damn. what the hell is wrong with me.
XNemesisX Posted June 8, 2005 Posted June 8, 2005 What the hell is wrong with you? You are in love. Most of us here can relate to what you are going through. Doesn't seem fair, does it? I have had the impulses to make my ex's life a living nightmare but don't be like the woman in Fatal Attraction. You are better than that. Seriously though, are you taking into consideration the thought of possibly admitting yourself to a mental health facility? One day you will look back on all this and you will feel glad you didn't end up with her. Odds are, you WILL find someone else that will make you so much happier one day. It just takes patience (at least that is what I am telling myself these days).
Author rastafari Posted June 8, 2005 Author Posted June 8, 2005 LETS RETIRE THIS THRED. im not by any means going to send anything to her or her parents ever. i have been having highs and lows over the past months and last week i hit a major low and freeked out and felt as if there was something i could do to make thigs better. i wasent thinking straight at all obvisouly because that letter wouldnt have done anything but made things worse by letteing her parents know i cant handel my sh*t and im a nutbag. yea i have tried to get all the help i could get, minus going to the damn hospital, f*uck that. i have been diagnosed depressed a long time ago, i took meds for a few weeks but it didnt do a whole lot so i got off them. i got some new meds today that i dont want to take, but i have to for the time being so i dont freek out and do dumb shi+ like send the ex's parents pointless letters along with other things. this is really random, but i found it strange, you should try. or maby not. i was just looking at photos of my ex and photos of us together. its soo weird, it feels like i dont even know her at all. last few times i came in contact with her was like a month ago, and it felt the same. like i dont even know her.
ReluctantRomeo Posted June 8, 2005 Posted June 8, 2005 Originally posted by rastafari i have been diagnosed depressed a long time ago, i took meds for a few weeks but it didnt do a whole lot so i got off them. i got some new meds today that i dont want to take, but i have to for the time being so i dont freek out and do dumb shi+ like send the ex's parents pointless letters along with other things. Antidepressants take time to work. You should keep taking them anyhow - they will kick in. Eventually.
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