toomellow Posted January 2, 2016 Posted January 2, 2016 (edited) Its been 5 years since I was dumped over a text message. We had been together for 3 years but it felt so much longer because we saw each other everyday and spent every night together. Things were going well and I was going off to college. I had been in a couple relationships before this but as you can see I was still very young. From my understanding, the relationship ended because I wasn't giving her as much attention while I was in college, which is true and I know it was my fault for losing her. However, I loved her very much and not once did I cheat on her or even thought about it. I had so many opportunities but it wasn't something I wanted to do. Randomly in spring , I got a text and it said she didnt think I cared about the relationship anymore and that she couldn't handle trying to make it work for the both of us. Now I was furious that she would try to talk to me over text because I'm not much of a texter but especially with a break up. I was so angry that she texted me and that she wouldnt answer my phone call that day or the next. So at the time, I remember just trying to forget the text and to just let a week or two go by and then try to call her. A week or so went by and the same thing happened, she ignored my calls. Then 2 weeks or so later, I get one final text from her and it says that she wants to see me in person to **** because she misses me. (I forget how it was worded but thats pretty much what she said) Now I'm not gay and I really loved her and she had hurt me so I was still pretty angry, So I told her that I didnt want to just meet up with her to ****, and she never responded back so that was that. Fast forward a couple months towards the end of the summer, I messaged her on facebook, and I told her I was going to be in town and that I really wanted to talk to her and that we should go get something to drink. She messaged me back and she said she had no money to go out. Now at this point, the anger came back because of the way she responded about not having money so I didnt respond and left it at that. Now 5 years later, I find out that I am going to have to spend a day with her because shes going to be at my good friends wedding. I have no feelings for her and I havnt really thought about her since the facebook message, but I also never really thought about our breakup. Because at the time I thought it was just a small deal that would pass. My way of dealing with the breakup at the time was to be angry at her for the way things ended. But really deep down inside I truly loved her and I did miss her alot that year after breaking up but I had always clung onto my anger I had for her. Me and her will both be 25 now, Would it be awkward to not talk to her at the wedding? Also something to mention is she did get into a relationship and still is in one with a guy that I had introduced her to. (Also this guy owed me some money and had some of my things and he was ignoring me for a while because he didnt want to have to talk to me cause he knew i knew that they were having a thing only a couple months after the break up in the summer. And because of that I ended up robbing him of some things which I dont know if he knows it was me.) Also I have been in 2 relationships since then and I dont think about either ex's. But after hearing that I was going to see my ex from 5 years ago, feelings and thoughts are creeping up on me and I feel like I still miss her alot and that there is so much I want to say and hear from her Edited January 2, 2016 by toomellow
Qboro90 Posted January 2, 2016 Posted January 2, 2016 The best way to go about it is when your paths cross at the wedding, act like you haven't thought about her whatsoever and your life is going perfectly great as it is. "Heyy! How are you? Long time no see.. How's everything/are you working/etc" Make it appear as if you know nothing about what she's done since you two broke up. If you show that you're still upset and angry, then that gives her the upper hand and she can toy/make fun of you once you part ways. However, if you come across as mature and a grown up with other priorities besides a young breakup scorn from 5 years back, then that's the "screw you" she will feel hardest. If you end up talking to her more in depth during the wedding, and you really want to discuss it. The best way is to do so with humor. Definitely don't bring it up like you've been practicing your speech all this time when u finally could confront her. Maybe after a few drinks and making small talk, if relationships come up or the convo gives you an opportunity to speak about it, work along the lines of "ill tell you one thing... Your breakup text would've been a lot easier to comprehend if emojis were available back then" light heartedly. Or if you really wanna set her up and you're around a few friends that you know well enough, wave her over with "Heyy.. ___(her name), we were just talking about the worst way someone broke up with you... What exactly did you text me when we broke up? "Hey bro, not into you anymore, later"... Or something like that?" ... If you have the personality to tease her then do so. Understand that it's not for everyone. Oh.. And disregard All of that if there's a better than good chance she knows you robbed her current BF. Odds are they think you're an ******* for doing so even if he owed you money. Don't want her to call you a theif and sully your rep at a wedding amongst friends.
Author toomellow Posted January 2, 2016 Author Posted January 2, 2016 Yeah I would most likely do that but I know I would want to mention what actually happened between us and I'd prefer she would just say she met that other guy and things just happened cause I would be fine with that. But if she mentions that she thought I was ****ing around , it might **** with my head because I never did and it led to a chain of events that really I today regret the most.
Qboro90 Posted January 2, 2016 Posted January 2, 2016 Yeah I would most likely do that but I know I would want to mention what actually happened between us and I'd prefer she would just say she met that other guy and things just happened cause I would be fine with that. But if she mentions that she thought I was ****ing around , it might **** with my head because I never did and it led to a chain of events that really I today regret the most. She's not thinking about it as in depth as you are. She's moved in with her life and probably won't even think about it when she sees you. If you haven't seen her in years then assume you haven't crossed her mind in years as well.
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