Bobbi7 Posted January 2, 2016 Posted January 2, 2016 I was kind of pissed of what my friend said about my hair. Awhile back, a co-worker was giving me a compliment on my hair-because I just got it colored, my friend-another co-worker was sitting with us and she flat out said, "I think its a waste of money" getting your hair done. Now, I don't know what her problem is-but its like the 2nd time she made this comment. I know, that everyone has opinions on what "they" think is a waste-but she should keep her mouth shut. I'm not spending HER money. So, what if I payed to get my hair done??? I payed only $40! My god, its not like I spend $500 on my hair. I know that she can't afford it, but there's no need to bitch at people on what they should spend. Heck, there's people that spend money on things that I would never pay for like video games, or an xbox, designer clothes, high-end makeup, coach purse, but I don't tell them that its a waste of money for them. They can afford it, so they are free to buy what they want. A lousy $40 on getting my hair colored and I get bitched from her is what I get? She might be jealous.
acapelo_dp Posted January 2, 2016 Posted January 2, 2016 I'm thinking that she may be a bit jealous and that is why she made the comments. Especially since you said she doesn't have a lot of money to spend on that stuff. But $40 isn't a lot at all, usually when I go to the salon it's about $150. You can certainly spend your money how you like
basil67 Posted January 2, 2016 Posted January 2, 2016 Probably not jealous. Just bitter. If you don't like her then do your best to avoid her.
AspenBaldwin Posted January 2, 2016 Posted January 2, 2016 You should do a sexy hair flip whenever she says that. Show her is worth every penny. 4
BettyDraper Posted January 2, 2016 Posted January 2, 2016 She sounds jealous and bitter. You don't need friends like that.
NewLeaf512 Posted January 2, 2016 Posted January 2, 2016 $4, $40, $400, or $4,000 it is none of her bloody business what you spend on anything at all. Next time she buys anything, do the same. And if she says it again say: "I can see that you clearly do not think spending money to make yourself look more attractive or stylish is important to you" That should shut her right up.
CarrieT Posted January 2, 2016 Posted January 2, 2016 I just got it colored, my friend-another co-worker was sitting with us and she flat out said, "I think its a waste of money" getting your hair done. Now, I don't know what her problem is-but its like the 2nd time she made this comment. Why are you internalizing this!?!? What she was probably saying was, "getting ONE'S hair done is a waste of money." i.e., for HER, it is not worth spending money on. There are people who get mani-pedis. I am one of those who think *that* is a waste of money but it is not an indictment against those who have it done, it is just a general statement of worth from my perspective. This chick probably means nothing against you - just that she doesn't see the worth to having one's hair colored. I think you need to take a chill-pill. 10
acrosstheuniverse Posted January 2, 2016 Posted January 2, 2016 I think you need to relax. It sounds like she's just saying that for her it's a waste of money. If you truly felt like what you spend your money on is your business, nobody else's, this comment wouldn't bother you at all. I just spent $100 on a fancy diary for 2016 because I use paper diaries obsessively and will get a lot of use and enjoyment out of it every day, I use a filofax but decided to try something new and treat myself, if it doesn't work for me or isn't worth the money I'll go back to cheap options the following year. When I told my friends and family I'd spent that much on a diary they all laughed at the price and acted in mock horror at how I could spend so much on something I could use a notebook for. It didn't bother me at all, everyone has different priorities. I have friends who'll spent hundreds on a handbag, whereas I rarely spend anymore more than about $50. Why would I get all butthurt over other people's opinions on my spending habits? Why does it even matter to you? 1
CarrieT Posted January 2, 2016 Posted January 2, 2016 (edited) Next time she buys anything, do the same. And if she says it again say: "I can see that you clearly do not think spending money to make yourself look more attractive or stylish is important to you" That should shut her right up. That is an extremely passive-aggressive stance to take just to make a point. Edited January 2, 2016 by CarrieT 1
guy93 Posted January 2, 2016 Posted January 2, 2016 (edited) these are not friends, they are friendly-mannered co-workers, they are more like acquaintances, more like people who you might have to be careful of promotion prospects could be at stake, so just let it ride, do not argue, do nothing that makes you seem obnoxious or you run the risk of nobody promoting you, you are in two against one situation, leave it long enough and they will bitch at each other, lol Edited January 2, 2016 by guy93
SpiralOut Posted January 3, 2016 Posted January 3, 2016 (edited) It's annoying, but it's not that big a deal. Maybe it bothers her to see you getting a compliment. She may be jealous of the positive attention you are getting, not of the haircut itself. Whatever the case, I wouldn't consider her much of a friend. Edited January 3, 2016 by SpiralOut
preraph Posted January 3, 2016 Posted January 3, 2016 She's not talking about you. She's talking about to HER, it seems like a waste of money and she wouldn't do it for herself. You take things too personally. You can't take anything even close to disagreement and take it as criticism when it's just her giving her opinion about what she would spend money on for her own self.
burnt Posted January 3, 2016 Posted January 3, 2016 these are not friends, they are friendly-mannered co-workers, they are more like acquaintances, more like people who you might have to be careful of Guess my definition of 'friends' is not 'people who complement you about everything you are', but rather people who speak their minds openly even if they sometimes end up saying something less than pleasant. I often say 'oh that looks nice' to people just to be nice and polite and to make peachy small-talks. So I guess I prefer sincere open obnoxious over pleasant fake politeness. I guess I value crude honesty more than sweet etiquette.
BettyDraper Posted January 3, 2016 Posted January 3, 2016 (edited) What I've learned is that just because I have an opinion, it doesn't mean that it is appropriate to share it at all times. For example, I have a friend whose house is disgusting. Her house smells like rotten food, her floors are dirty and her kids are practically feral. I don't tell her how I feel about her housekeeping skills because that would be rude. I simply do not visit her home. Edited January 3, 2016 by BettyDraper
BettyDraper Posted January 3, 2016 Posted January 3, 2016 Guess my definition of 'friends' is not 'people who complement you about everything you are', but rather people who speak their minds openly even if they sometimes end up saying something less than pleasant. I often say 'oh that looks nice' to people just to be nice and polite and to make peachy small-talks. So I guess I prefer sincere open obnoxious over pleasant fake politeness. I guess I value crude honesty more than sweet etiquette. Who was saying that friends have to compliment everything you are? It is more than possible to be honest without being cruel or presumptuous.
carhill Posted January 3, 2016 Posted January 3, 2016 40 for a good color job is a helluva deal. IMO, find friends who compliment you on your stylish color and cut.
Jammer25 Posted January 4, 2016 Posted January 4, 2016 So...why is this an issue if you don't care what she thinks? I find it odd when people become super reactionary on a random person's comment.
Belle88 Posted January 5, 2016 Posted January 5, 2016 I think sometimes people say things without thinking. I know many people who spend triple that amount on their hair when they cant pay their basic bills, but its not my business nor do i comment on it. I'd just ignore it.
NewLeaf512 Posted January 5, 2016 Posted January 5, 2016 That is an extremely passive-aggressive stance to take just to make a point. It depends how egregious one feels the passive aggressive stance on telling someone the money they spent on improving their appearance is. 1
Author Bobbi7 Posted March 18, 2016 Author Posted March 18, 2016 I'm wasn't waiting for her to make a compliment on my hair, the fact that she had the nerve to tell me that its a waste of money to do something that I'm free to do and as little as getting my hair colored to improve my appearance was just rude. Apparently she doesn't care about her appearance given that she has nappy hair and would probably cost her thousands of dollars and would need to be in a salon for 4 hours, I'm not her and I don't have her type of hair.
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