Thatmixedotaku Posted January 1, 2016 Posted January 1, 2016 Came across some pictures today of my ex that her friends tagged her in on FB . I dont know how to describe it. Yesterday night my heart ache was on 1000000000000 just thinking that i am entering the year alone , when i thought it would be with her, i have been a mess for weeks , and she looks so...happy. Positively glowing. Loving life, after crushing mine , after chewing me and spitting me out . How can a person be this way? How is any of this fair? Why do i have to suffer and feel like absolute ****e , while to her i am a mere after thought ? Somehow this fact is hurting me now more than ever .
Marco Valerio Posted January 1, 2016 Posted January 1, 2016 As doctor House said: People lie You never know how people are really feeling, maybe she is happy partying and doing stuff, or maybe she's not, and she's just trying to move on the best way she can (faking happiness) 1
D.r.e Posted January 1, 2016 Posted January 1, 2016 Would you put how sad you are on social media? Or do you tend to filter things so that your pages show the highlights of your life? Regardlesd, maybe she is happy. She has no bearing on your happiness. You are responsible for your own. 1
TaraMaiden2 Posted January 1, 2016 Posted January 1, 2016 Came across some pictures today of my ex that her friends tagged her in on FB . I dont know how to describe it. Yesterday night my heart ache was on 1000000000000 just thinking that i am entering the year alone , when i thought it would be with her, i have been a mess for weeks , and she looks so...happy. Positively glowing. Loving life, after crushing mine , after chewing me and spitting me out . How can a person be this way? How is any of this fair? Why do i have to suffer and feel like absolute ****e , while to her i am a mere after thought ? Somehow this fact is hurting me now more than ever . She isn't hurting you. YOU are. Delete fb. Close every avenue off and do not participate in any social media interaction. It can be done, it HAS been done, people survived without FB before it was created, and please trust me on this - so will you. 1
Author Thatmixedotaku Posted January 1, 2016 Author Posted January 1, 2016 She isn't hurting you. YOU are. Delete fb. Close every avenue off and do not participate in any social media interaction. It can be done, it HAS been done, people survived without FB before it was created, and please trust me on this - so will you. Well, problem is i see her everyday in real life as well, however much i dont want to . Not only on social media. The pics were just a nice little reminder
Chronotrgr Posted January 1, 2016 Posted January 1, 2016 I haven't been a Facebook user for quite some time, I used to like MySpace though, those bulletins where great for getting a wad off your chest, as an adult now I see no reason for Facebook, I don't want it and don't care for it, I don't even know if my ex is on it or not, I don't want to know, I don't want to see what she's up to, I don't want any part of it, I used to use hangouts and Skype to contact friends and if they didn't have it, then oh well. 1
Author Thatmixedotaku Posted January 1, 2016 Author Posted January 1, 2016 Would you put how sad you are on social media? Or do you tend to filter things so that your pages show the highlights of your life? Regardlesd, maybe she is happy. She has no bearing on your happiness. You are responsible for your own. Thing is, i see her everyday OUTSIDE social media. In real life .
Pamvhv Posted January 1, 2016 Posted January 1, 2016 I am a firm believer that happiness is a decision. If she's happy even though you broke up she's decided to be. You can decide to be happy too. Sure, I wallowed for a couple of months after my breakup but then I decided it was time to find my happiness. I put my big girl pants on and faked it till I made it. You can do that too. Positive thoughts like "I'm seeing her right now but it really doesn't break me" said over and over in your head like a mantra until you believe it. 1
TaraMaiden2 Posted January 1, 2016 Posted January 1, 2016 So what? I mean, really, so f - u - c - k - i - n - g what?? So? You see her every day....? Well here's the thing: Every single bit of angst, torment, sadness, grief, misery, anguish, is there and present, because you allow it, give it access and grant it permission. "Put your hands in the air like you don't care!" Fake it 'til you make it. Don't give a d(s) a(h) m(i) n(t). It's only by you stressing and thinking "Oooh, no, I'm gonna see her again, ooh-er, it's gonna hurt, gonna bring al the pain up again and again!" that it hurts and brings up the pain. Because you let it. Time to let go and get over it, my son. Keep treading on egg-shells and your life will be one great big crappy mess of broken eggs. 1
D.r.e Posted January 1, 2016 Posted January 1, 2016 Thing is, i see her everyday OUTSIDE social media. In real life . You see her everyday and yet you still go on facebook to see her?
Author Thatmixedotaku Posted January 1, 2016 Author Posted January 1, 2016 You see her everyday and yet you still go on facebook to see her? I didnt go on Facebook to see her. I removed her as my friend, deleted contacts , etc. Just so happens one of my friends was at a party and she was there and they took photos, etc , that ended up on my timeline .
Author Thatmixedotaku Posted January 1, 2016 Author Posted January 1, 2016 HAahhahaha, best reply i could have hoped for 1
Author Thatmixedotaku Posted January 1, 2016 Author Posted January 1, 2016 So what? I mean, really, so f - u - c - k - i - n - g what?? So? You see her every day....? Well here's the thing: Every single bit of angst, torment, sadness, grief, misery, anguish, is there and present, because you allow it, give it access and grant it permission. "Put your hands in the air like you don't care!" Fake it 'til you make it. Don't give a d(s) a(h) m(i) n(t). It's only by you stressing and thinking "Oooh, no, I'm gonna see her again, ooh-er, it's gonna hurt, gonna bring al the pain up again and again!" that it hurts and brings up the pain. Because you let it. Time to let go and get over it, my son. Keep treading on egg-shells and your life will be one great big crappy mess of broken eggs. Well, tough advice, but very true ...i need an immediate attitude change ..the moping has to go . wont be easy, but i am most definately taking your advice for the long run Not giving a d(s) a(h) m(i) n(t)
ExtraSpice Posted January 1, 2016 Posted January 1, 2016 Social media is the kryptonite for people after a breakup. I make it a point not to go on Facebook. Life doesn't really operate on what is fair and what is not. It just goes, without regard to anything life moves on. And the best way to live is probably move with it. Not concentrate on the what ifs and the hows of the past, but learn from it and live in the present. Granted that is a lot easier said than done and I could benefit from my own advice as well. I am sure seeing her everyday makes it difficult but you have to make it a point to tell yourself not to care. It may be difficult to do but you will reach a point when you get sick of it all. It is okay to feel sad, hurt as long as you don't get consumed by it.
Jax13 Posted January 1, 2016 Posted January 1, 2016 I was with my ex for 4.5 years so I know all her little quirks and how she deals with emotional stuff. For my ex, she is great at really putting on a happy face and going out and trying to make it look like she is having a great time when she is really dealing with everything inside. Lots of the time it's all just an act. A friend of mine brought up that she saw my ex last night and she looked to be having a great time out drinking and seemed to have a new guy hanging onto her like they were a couple. Not 24 hours earlier, my ex had texted me telling me that she was in a bad situation and felt awful... So I don't think you get over feeling awful in under 24 hours. Alcohol seems to help though I guess (at least temporarily) 1
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